I quess I have to do this at sometime, so why not now, this is only going to sting the moment I press post.. hopefully.
I come from a Christian family and as a child I had faith in Jesus, but then got dissapointed and went to the world. I was partly led to the wrong paths by a friend, but not her fault, just mine because I had a choice and just didn't make a great one.
Tried to be something I was not. Because at one point everything in me was shouting "No, I don't like this, this is wrong", but I suppressed that and just continued in that path, solely for the reason of not to be left without friends. It is funny how people around you can influence you.. You become something you are not and then you start to believe that is what you are, yet feeling miserable.
When in the world, I did not let anyone to say bad things about God, He still was my parents God. I used to sush my friends if they spoke degradingly about God, but hey, I wasn't any better, because I didn't have my faith in Him and dwelled in the world.
But He, Jesus, seeked me out in 2012 and now I am His. Although, I have to admit that I became lukewarm Christian for a while after few years. I am a bit perfectionist, if I cannot do something perfect, I just might give it up, so that might have left me lukewarm. Because I didn't think I read enough the Bible, or spent enough time with the Lord etc, so it kind of slipped from me, I still believed in Him but didn't feel I did enough, so I didn't read His word for a while and just lived my life as "christian".
Also God has done great things. I was utterly terrified, with panic attacs, of the dark, for 3 to 4 years, but back in 2012 God freed me from that fear! I love walking outside in the evening and night time, because I have my Heavenly Father watching over me. I remember the first time after that I walked in the dark and I felt so, hard to describe, but like I had my hand in Fathers hand and there were nothing that could harm me because He was there protecting me. Wonderful feeling like of childlike joy of being able to be in the dark without a fear.
Well, if you managed to wade through all that, and probably all the mistakes I made, thank you,
I am here hoping to find some like-minded friends if possible.
God bless!
I come from a Christian family and as a child I had faith in Jesus, but then got dissapointed and went to the world. I was partly led to the wrong paths by a friend, but not her fault, just mine because I had a choice and just didn't make a great one.
Tried to be something I was not. Because at one point everything in me was shouting "No, I don't like this, this is wrong", but I suppressed that and just continued in that path, solely for the reason of not to be left without friends. It is funny how people around you can influence you.. You become something you are not and then you start to believe that is what you are, yet feeling miserable.
When in the world, I did not let anyone to say bad things about God, He still was my parents God. I used to sush my friends if they spoke degradingly about God, but hey, I wasn't any better, because I didn't have my faith in Him and dwelled in the world.
But He, Jesus, seeked me out in 2012 and now I am His. Although, I have to admit that I became lukewarm Christian for a while after few years. I am a bit perfectionist, if I cannot do something perfect, I just might give it up, so that might have left me lukewarm. Because I didn't think I read enough the Bible, or spent enough time with the Lord etc, so it kind of slipped from me, I still believed in Him but didn't feel I did enough, so I didn't read His word for a while and just lived my life as "christian".
Also God has done great things. I was utterly terrified, with panic attacs, of the dark, for 3 to 4 years, but back in 2012 God freed me from that fear! I love walking outside in the evening and night time, because I have my Heavenly Father watching over me. I remember the first time after that I walked in the dark and I felt so, hard to describe, but like I had my hand in Fathers hand and there were nothing that could harm me because He was there protecting me. Wonderful feeling like of childlike joy of being able to be in the dark without a fear.
Well, if you managed to wade through all that, and probably all the mistakes I made, thank you,
I am here hoping to find some like-minded friends if possible.
God bless!
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