Single at Christmas

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It was during Christmas week of 2004 that I broke up with my first and still only girlfriend. That makes 2012 my 8th consecutive Christmas as a single guy (to put it in another perspective, I was single during the entire 8 season run of the TV show House, M.D.) and to be completely honest, I'm kinda used to it. I'm not so sure that Christmas feels that much different than any other time of the year when you're single, and for me personally, Christmas stands out because of the breakup itself, not necessarily due to a general lonely feeling.
 
ya know, single at Christmas doesn't sound so bad compared to being with the wrong person. Trust me, it could be A LOT worse.
 
This is my second Christmas without anyone and Ive had waves of depression with it. Its my favorite time of the year and it sucks. I just miss the ex. I see him and we still have this strong connection....but hes engaged, even tho hes setteling. I know its not always going to be like this, but I do have my grandpa and I know I wont always have this time with him. Im going to enjoy it as much as I can!! :)
 
To me it is not so much Christmas or any other big holiday that bothers me about not being in a relationship, it the everyday stuff like not having someone to do crossword puzzles with or always being the one who has to pick up the dry cleaning! :D
 
I don't really feel alone at Christmas. It's such a hectic time for me making presents and visiting people and eating, and eating, and eating... mmmmm.

The only time I feel lonely is during certain family gatherings. I'm the youngest in a family of three. My sister is married, my brother is married... sometimes when we're sitting in the living room talking I reflect on what I see: My brother and his wife, my sister and her husband, my mom and dad together and then me, the square peg. (sad trombone) Although I am lucky to be surrounded by such great examples of marriage. That at least comforts me that there is still hope.
 
I know Christmas has come and gone, however. I don't think its an issue of being single at Christmas as much as it is being lonely during the Holidays.

I love this time of year and it would be so much better to have a love to share it with.

Maybe next year.
 
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