Basically, I haven't been able to goto church lately because of school and work. Now that I'm done with semester I go out and goto church(and look for a girlfriend too ^_^) so I'm pretty much better than I used(Being a little less shy) to be when it comes to talking to girls. But I still don't know how to go from small talk to some deeper conversation... Any Ideas?
Well, the best bet is to stop even thinking about it and let things happen? When you have a normal conversation, do you sit and think about what you're going to say most of the time, or do you just go out and say it?
I'm probably insane, and I talk way too much, all the time, but it works for me somehow with women. I think it's because I take all the awkwardness out of meeting someone, because they never have that awkward "silent" moment with me. I'm either talking nonstop, or I'm listening and waiting on the chance to cut them off and jump back in, which is extremely rude, but I'm claiming insanity as my excuse.
Anyway, point being, just... talk! Who cares what you say? Do you ever care what she says when a cute girl is talking to you, or do you just listen, agree, have the conversation, and think to yourself how cute she is? Maybe I'm alone on that aspect, meaning I'm a horrible listener or something, but still... I think there are a lot of guys just like me out there. If there are a lot of guys like that, there are a lot of women like that too, and they just don't admit it.
So... how do you get into a deeper conversation? You bring up deeper subjects. That's it. It's that easy.
Let's say you are talking about something completely stupid and insignificant, like politics (haha). Where do you go from here? This subject goes nowhere fast, doesn't it? The weather is a deep topic that you want to talk about, so here's what you do. You say... "So, beyond that whole politic thing, I don't really care about that stuff. I was just wondering, what do you think about the weather?"
Easy!
Now, if we are being serious here... let's say you want to talk about spirituality. That's a tough subject to bring up if you aren't actually in church, or if you don't know if the girl is a real christian or not.
Just say "So, do you see yourself as a spiritual person? I always thought I was, but I guess I wanna know how others define it? What do you think?"
Easy!
Now, let's say you wanted to talk to her about going on a date.
You are talking to her about something insignificant and petty, like... the meaning of life. You tell her that the meaning of life is a great idea and all, but what you're really interested in is something deeper. You're kind of a deep guy, and well... you were wondering... what kind of guy does she usually date? What's her 'type?' Does she like guys that are a little deeper than the normal snowflake, or is she more into the all brains and no meat on their bones: jocks? You are asking because, you've always noticed her and always had a little crush, and just thought it would be fun if you two went out for some coffee sometime. Maybe grab some lunch and just get to know each other better. You'll pay, unless she's against all that chivalry nonsense, in which case, you'll let her pay for her own meal thank you very much! Also, you're a really nice guy (but not too nice, since you don't finish last!), you don't bite very hard (and only during involuntary muscle spasms, can't be helped, genetic disorder and all), and if she doesn't have fun, you'll refund her money and her time, because you've invented a time machine and you'll take her back to precisely the moment before she ever knew you existed, which was like 10 minutes ago.
See that? A bunch of rambling nonsense, but it works. Trust me. I don't know how, but it works.
Basically, you make a girl giggle, even if you aren't really funny but she sees you are trying to be, and you're golden. Beyond that, just be yourself and usually you'll be more interesting than 99% of the rest of the world. Most people are low-IQ meatheads, to be honest, and if you're a nice guy with a positive outlook, well... she might just dig ya!
So basically, all I'm saying is.... just take a chance, because you know what? Who cares? That's the whole point. The LESS you care about what people think about you, the HIGHER people think of you, and MORE people think about you as well! The same goes for women too. The less you really care what she says, be it yes or no, then the more likely she will say yes. Desperate people aren't attractive. Plus, there's the whole push/pull theory, which basically is that everyone wants what they can't have (Adam and Eve, classic example! Can't eat that apple? So Eve listens to a talking snake? And eats the apple? Really Eve? Way to drop the ball there figtree-for-brains).
So, now, are we clear? Just stop caring and stop thinking. You'll get results. Trust me on this. I'm a Doctor. Well, I stayed at a Holiday Inn once, and I switched my car insurance to Geico, and then to Progressive. I probably even saved 10%, although it's still 100% more than what I'd really like to pay.
Think before hand if there are specifics you would most like to chat about. What side of her you most want to get to know. And what you don't mind sharing about you. Things like that.
