Streams of Consciousness & Thoughts~~~

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Snow + flip flops + slippery rocks = Cristen fell on her rear-end.

I do own boots. I just...apparently...prefer to live dangerously.
 
arwen83 said:
Disabled my Facebook. Feels like I've cut the strings of social media. Those from cc that I am friends with, I didn't unfriend you :)
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Yay! Not unfriended!

Don't worry, doll. Life goes on without FB. I haven't done anything with my newsfeed in almost two years; in fact, the only thing I use FB for is messaging directly with people. I don't read updates on anyone, and I don't post updates myself. Wanna know what's going on in my life? ACTUALLY TALK TO ME. And if I want to know what's going on in yours, I will talk to you. It's not mean, it's just reality: I don't have time to read about everytime someone buys a shirt, or to scroll past the Ohio State marching band's video 37 times. I have living to do, and I can't do it by living vicariously through my friends.

I think you'll be surprised how much free time you suddenly have when you're not checking the feed. ^_^
 
Shouryu said:
Yay! Not unfriended!

Don't worry, doll. Life goes on without FB. I haven't done anything with my newsfeed in almost two years; in fact, the only thing I use FB for is messaging directly with people. I don't read updates on anyone, and I don't post updates myself. Wanna know what's going on in my life? ACTUALLY TALK TO ME. And if I want to know what's going on in yours, I will talk to you. It's not mean, it's just reality: I don't have time to read about everytime someone buys a shirt, or to scroll past the Ohio State marching band's video 37 times. I have living to do, and I can't do it by living vicariously through my friends.

I think you'll be surprised how much free time you suddenly have when you're not checking the feed. ^_^
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Mhmm, I agree. Today I read 126 pages in a new book that I bought. I would have been too distracted otherwise.
 
So I think I might have some unresolved issues over my Mom's death last summer. I woke up this morning around 4:30 talking so loudly it actually woke me up and I was still talking & couldn't stop...all I remember was saying something like,"Why did you leave?" "You Lied about everything!" "Everything you ever told me was a lie."
... and then I actually started crying,for like a minute...I dunno what happened...then I stopped,and I just felt sick.
I'm not even sure what the dream was about. All I know is that my Mom was in it...and I was a younger version of me,but at the age I am now (if that makes sense?)
I have never had any sort of dreams about her since she's passed. This was the first time. I hope it was the last if this is how my memories of her are going to play out when I sleep.
I love my Mother. I still do.
I think I am upset with her giving up. Her death was pointless & she could have easily gotten better if she'd gone to the doctor sooner. She hated doctors & hospitals,so she refused & just got sicker.
Of course I had no clue as to what was going on because she knew I'd be hounding her to go get things looked at.
I'm not ever sure why I am posting about this.
Today I felt as though nothing mattered anymore.
I don't like letting my feelings control me.
I guess a part of me feels very abandoned & betrayed...
it's stupid.
I know Jesus went through so much more than I'll ever know,and yet that truth only makes me feel more horrible for what is in my heart.
 
If I knew if I could sleep decently tonight, I'd just curl up in a ball and sleep till whatever time tomorrow morning. I...do not feel good at this moment. But I know I will in the morning.
 
Took a walk through the snow (separate from my falling down incident, and wearing boots this time) after the sun went down. Was very pleasant, even with snowflakes getting stuck to the inside of my glasses...and my eye lashes....and the outside of my glasses...

So, aside from not being able to see a thing, it was quite nice.
 
Originally Posted by Loveneverfails I've had enough of the 'tude from you, mister. I am not afraid to poke you in your suspicious eye.
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Ugly said:
Bring It On!

View attachment 61667
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Ah, HisLoveneverfails , you're making ugly cry (see that tear on ugly's lip-eye?)


Po' baby. CAn't you see what's happening?
images


Someone of you, ladies, please, say something to make ugleye feel better D:
 
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iTOREtheSKY said:
So I think I might have some unresolved issues over my Mom's death last summer. I woke up this morning around 4:30 talking so loudly it actually woke me up and I was still talking & couldn't stop...all I remember was saying something like,"Why did you leave?" "You Lied about everything!" "Everything you ever told me was a lie."
... and then I actually started crying,for like a minute...I dunno what happened...then I stopped,and I just felt sick.
I'm not even sure what the dream was about. All I know is that my Mom was in it...and I was a younger version of me,but at the age I am now (if that makes sense?)
I have never had any sort of dreams about her since she's passed. This was the first time. I hope it was the last if this is how my memories of her are going to play out when I sleep.
I love my Mother. I still do.
I think I am upset with her giving up. Her death was pointless & she could have easily gotten better if she'd gone to the doctor sooner. She hated doctors & hospitals,so she refused & just got sicker.
Of course I had no clue as to what was going on because she knew I'd be hounding her to go get things looked at.
I'm not ever sure why I am posting about this.
Today I felt as though nothing mattered anymore.
I don't like letting my feelings control me.
I guess a part of me feels very abandoned & betrayed...
it's stupid.
I know Jesus went through so much more than I'll ever know,and yet that truth only makes me feel more horrible for what is in my heart.
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Dreams are strange and confusing sometimes I-Tore. I was 16 when my Dad passed away, I had a really tough time with that for years. Right after he died I had this dream where I was by myself sitting in the center of all these folding chairs in a funeral home. There was a casket in the front of the room, like a regular viewing. My Dad was walking around the room in circles, like he'd come in one door, circle by me and go out another.

At some point in the dream I asked him something, he stopped and said, "I can't because I'm dead!" His face was like in 3d when he said it. It was the most bizarre and scary dream I've ever had. To this day I've never had a dream like that. My Dad was very ill he had cancer for years and his death wasn't a surprise, he couldn't have prevented it, like you said your Mom had. a

Sometimes when we have unresolved issues with things our minds will go there. It can feel like every sad thing you could possibly think of comes out in a dream. When you wake up it can seem so real that you might not be able to shake that freaky feeling for a while.

It's only been a year since your Mom died, You're still healing. If you can I'd seek grief counseling from a professional. Someone who can help you through this. Write your feelings down in a journal. I'm not trying to sound like a know it all wanna be Dr. Phil, I just remember how hard it was for me to lose my Dad.

I still have moments where I feel jilted or ripped off because I didn't have him in my life for very long. I still after all these years think of him everyday and look forward to seeing him again. But it takes time and share your feelings, it's better to do that then keep things bottled up.

Praying for you.
 
Sometimes I feel as strong as a deep-rooted, well-tended oak tree. Other times I feel as fragile as the leaves it bears.

Or perhaps I'm just tired and worn out right now.
 
Arwen, why dost thou lurk? I haven't seen you post at all since I've been back on CC
 
Loveneverfails said:
He is not my cat.

He is my minion.
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That just brings it to a whole new level of scary. You made my innards quiver in fear.

I suggest heeding Green and notice the agony and anguish you're putting me through!


And, ladies, i notice no support. None of you are getting anything for Xmas now. Not that you were anyways. But now you're getting a double helping of nothing!
 
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