I have to work all the time and it really really sucks. I'm really sad tonight because I treat everyone around me like dirt....I'm losing a lot of people because of who I've become. I feel like this monster who tries to hug other people but they run away and are scared of me because of how my heart really looks.:'( I don't know why I'm so depressed. I don't have any friends and the ones I do have never ask me to hang out...I feel like everyone is afraid of me. Why are people afraid of me? Have you ever felt like I do? Where all you want to do all day is curl up on the couch covered with a blanket, eat some ice cream and bawl your eyes out while watching "The Fault In Our Stars"...only wishing your life could be perfect. That's how I feel...my job and my career are my only life right now and it has kicked a lot of people out of my life. God keeps telling me to keep listening to His instruction. I feel like I've been listening to Him pretty well.I'm physically, mentally, and spiritually worn out from working on my life recently. I just need to take a step back and find out what's truly important. Maybe have a mini cry session with my family? I don't know. Maybe that might work...God is definitely my #1 priority because I know He can get me out of this mess I'm in. He's done a great job so far. This stress has my physical realm a mess. Please pray for me as you follow me in my crazy twisted messed up life.