Taken for a ride

[Lanolin]

Have you've ever been scammed or duped? Cheated on or deceived?

If so can you share so we can learn from it - I mean so we can learn to be wiser, and avoid those traps.
After you found out, what did you do? And did the person who scammed or duped you get any consequences..I mean did they go to jail or return your time or money or whatever it is they scammed you for?

Do you have any safety tips - aside from buckle up and put your seatbelt on!
I don't mean just 'watch for red flags' I mean things we need to really know before we hand over our money/lives/personal information. Or not give that out at all. Especially to someone who we never met before/doesn't have any friends to vouch for them/love bombs us.

 

[Gideon300]

Have you've ever been scammed or duped? Cheated on or deceived?

If so can you share so we can learn from it - I mean so we can learn to be wiser, and avoid those traps.
After you found out, what did you do? And did the person who scammed or duped you get any consequences..I mean did they go to jail or return your time or money or whatever it is they scammed you for?

Do you have any safety tips - aside from buckle up and put your seatbelt on!
I don't mean just 'watch for red flags' I mean things we need to really know before we hand over our money/lives/personal information. Or not give that out at all. Especially to someone who we never met before/doesn't have any friends to vouch for them/love bombs us.

I was scammed by a fake advertising campaign. We'd started a Bible School and obviously someone got wind of it. It seemed to be a worthy cause and I placed a small ad. The scammers sent us a copy of the publication. Alarm bells rang. It was a pretty ordinary production. Some of the "advertisers" were public companies and I could not contact them.

I looked closely at the details provided by the scammer. The address was a private home. There was no signage. They sent me another email, stating that they'd placed an ad in the next publication. I refused to pay for it. They got a little upset until I told them that I had not approved the ad, which was against the law.

It can be difficult. Most of the scams directed at me are from people I can barely understand. I have some fun sometimes, leaving them hanging for a while. Or I'll say something like, "Are you recording this?" They hang us pretty quick.

Some ways to avoid scams:

1. Check the business independently. Don't use the information provided to you by email or phone
2. Check if the business is genuine. Australia has business registration numbers
3. If there a rush to make a decision (I was told a deadline was close). Don't be pushed. Check first.
4. Don't give any information away unless absolutely necessary. Some scams are simply to get us to divulge information that can be used later.
5. Do not give access to your computer remotely. It's surprising how many people do. It's like giving the crook a key to your house and the car keys. I came close because the scammer caught me at the right time (for him). It all sounded legit. As soon as he asked for me to log in so he could see my computer remotely, I hung up.
6. Scammers can find personal information about you that makes them seem legitimate. Don't let familiarity fool you.

 

[Aussie52]

I had an email from what I thought was my internet provider requesting an update of my credit card details. Needless to say, it wasn't my provider and they put a sizable amount on my card. Fortunately, my bank, after some investigating, refunded the amount.
I am more the wiser after this incident.

 

[Lynx]

Keep in mind: If somebody is calling you and you have never met this person before, it is ALWAYS for the benefit of the one calling. Nobody is going to call you out of the blue just to inform you of some great deal, out of the goodness of their hearts.

As the xkcd author said, nobody is going to spend money to get the word out that they want to give you something for free.

 

[Lanolin]

I used to have this problem of telemarketers always calling (I don't even know how they got my number) and asking me to do a survey, or saying my computer is wrong and they need to fix it, when it wasn't and I'd never asked them to, or asking for money for a charity I'd had no interest in, etc. I end up only answering calls from people I know. If it's a 'private number' or one with many 000s and looks like from overseas, I just don't answer. They can leave a message if they that desperate. Thank God for caller ID.

And then there's people trying to do the hard sell. People saying gym memberships for $1 and then roping you into a contract that you can't break to siphon money off you for a year or so.

People who want you to sign things and not giving you time to read the fine print. Marketing people saying 'hurry' sale ends soon. They play on 'FOMO' fear of missing out. Mostly they just want to get rid of old stock. I.e the stuff that's not selling because people don't want it!

Who walks around a shop, with bags of money, waiting for people to sell you stuff? Do they think people really do this?

Most people go shopping with a list of things they are looking for and need to get. If its there they'll buy it, if it's not they'll ask for it, if they can't make up their mind they may do a browse and comparison shop to get the best deal, but nobody really likes being approached by people thinking they know what you want to buy and then giving you a product and then demanding payment. If they do that, more often than not its too good to be true or they think they can mind read of what you want and then expect you to drop your wallet into their hands.

I'll do the 'I'm now friends with you so now I have the right to steal your time and money' kind of cheat person in another post.

 

[SoulFaith]

Yes, I was deceived once and I hope others can learn from my mistake.

Not long after my divorce, I got to know a man online. We talked a lot and had video calls from time to time. After about six months, he started asking me to come and visit him for a vacation.

I hesitated for a long time because it was during the COVID pandemic. I also told him that traveling was expensive and that I would need to pay for a visa. Eventually, I managed to save enough money and decided to go.

When I arrived, he never came to the airport.

It was my very first time flying and I had never traveled abroad before. I was alone in a country that felt completely unfamiliar and frightening. Thankfully, I met some kind people who helped me and I was able to get through the situation safely.

Later I found out that the man was actually married. I never met him in person.

Looking back, I learned a painful lesson. No matter how much you think you know someone online, don't travel alone to another country to meet someone you've never met in person.

If you do decide to meet someone you've met online, choose a public place, let your family or trusted friends know exactly where you're going and don't ignore any warning signs. Your safety is always more important than giving someone the benefit of the doubt.

Please don't make the same mistake I did.

 

[SoulFaith]

As I was driving to work on Monday, I felt the Lord put it on my heart to share this experience, along with some of my other experiences. If my story can help even one woman avoid going through what I went through, then it's worth telling. I've learned a lot from it and I pray God will use even my painful experiences to protect and encourage others.

 

[passion84god]

Yes, I was deceived once and I hope others can learn from my mistake.

Not long after my divorce, I got to know a man online. We talked a lot and had video calls from time to time. After about six months, he started asking me to come and visit him for a vacation.

I hesitated for a long time because it was during the COVID pandemic. I also told him that traveling was expensive and that I would need to pay for a visa. Eventually, I managed to save enough money and decided to go.

When I arrived, he never came to the airport.

It was my very first time flying and I had never traveled abroad before. I was alone in a country that felt completely unfamiliar and frightening. Thankfully, I met some kind people who helped me and I was able to get through the situation safely.

Later I found out that the man was actually married. I never met him in person.

Looking back, I learned a painful lesson. No matter how much you think you know someone online, don't travel alone to another country to meet someone you've never met in person.

If you do decide to meet someone you've met online, choose a public place, let your family or trusted friends know exactly where you're going and don't ignore any warning signs. Your safety is always more important than giving someone the benefit of the doubt.

Please don't make the same mistake I did.

As a man, I am verry sorry that you had to endure all of that. A real man would never lay the financial burden of traveling solely upon you, so that should be a red flag for anybody if they ever find themselves in a similar situation in the future. May I ask how you later learned that he was married? In a situation like you described, it is perfectly reasonable to ask the man or woman, if the roles are reversed, for a valid form of identification before even considering such a journey. If he or she gets bothered by such a request and refuses to agree to it, then that should be a major red flag. I am about to hopefully start a new job soon, and yesterday I needed to give my consent for a background check to my future employer. In case you are not already aware of this, ordinary people like us can perform background checks of our own on other individuals. There are many websites where we can gain a lot of information about others for a small fee if we have some legitimate basic information about them at our disposal. In fact, I have run reports on some people myself in the past and found them not to be who they claimed to be.

Personally, I have never been scammed, even though I have been contacted by scammers many times and in many ways. Just yesterday, I received a "friend request" from a woman, if it really was a woman, on another social media website. The first red flag was that her profile was brand new. I performed a quick online search of some of her profile pictures, and I wasn't the least bit surprised to find that they were pictures of a porn actress. Of course, I didn't accept the friend request, and I did report the profile so nobody else might be scammed.

Like you suggested, if you ever are going to meet someone in person for the first time, it is wise to meet in a public place, preferably during the daytime, and to let others know as much information about the person and place where you are meeting. Again, I am sorry that you had to endure what you did.​

 

[SoulFaith]

As a man, I am verry sorry that you had to endure all of that. A real man would never lay the financial burden of traveling solely upon you, so that should be a red flag for anybody if they ever find themselves in a similar situation in the future. May I ask how you later learned that he was married? In a situation like you described, it is perfectly reasonable to ask the man or woman, if the roles are reversed, for a valid form of identification before even considering such a journey. If he or she gets bothered by such a request and refuses to agree to it, then that should be a major red flag. I am about to hopefully start a new job soon, and yesterday I needed to give my consent for a background check to my future employer. In case you are not already aware of this, ordinary people like us can perform background checks of our own on other individuals. There are many websites where we can gain a lot of information about others for a small fee if we have some legitimate basic information about them at our disposal. In fact, I have run reports on some people myself in the past and found them not to be who they claimed to be.

Personally, I have never been scammed, even though I have been contacted by scammers many times and in many ways. Just yesterday, I received a "friend request" from a woman, if it really was a woman, on another social media website. The first red flag was that her profile was brand new. I performed a quick online search of some of her profile pictures, and I wasn't the least bit surprised to find that they were pictures of a porn actress. Of course, I didn't accept the friend request, and I did report the profile so nobody else might be scammed.

Like you suggested, if you ever are going to meet someone in person for the first time, it is wise to meet in a public place, preferably during the daytime, and to let others know as much information about the person and place where you are meeting. Again, I am sorry that you had to endure what you did.​

Thank you for your kind words.

While I was in the country, I traveled to three different cities. I also went to the city where he lived. At a secure hotel, I spoke with some of the staff and a few local people. I showed them his photo and they recognized him. They told me who he was, where he lived, that he was married and even how many children he had.

That was how I found out the truth. It was heartbreaking, but at least I finally had answers.

 

[passion84god]

Thank you for your kind words.

While I was in the country, I traveled to three different cities. I also went to the city where he lived. At a secure hotel, I spoke with some of the staff and a few local people. I showed them his photo and they recognized him. They told me who he was, where he lived, that he was married and even how many children he had.

That was how I found out the truth. It was heartbreaking, but at least I finally had answers.

I don't know who I feel worse for. You or his wife and children? I am sorry that men like that exist. ​

 

[cinder]

But what about when your online friend tells you that they've always wanted to meet you and need a travel buddy for an all expenses paid cruise? Is that a scam? Asking for a friend.

 

[Churchgoer]

Great sharing and discussion.
I am always meet in person, get to know his circle first kind of approach.
Online is a pathway, but meet in person is real. Someone said dating does not start until meet in person, which I think is a awesome advice.

If people refuse to meet in person with you, then only consider them as internet chat people, no need to be serious.

 

[Lynx]

But what about when your online friend tells you that they've always wanted to meet you and need a travel buddy for an all expenses paid cruise? Is that a scam? Asking for a friend.

Or your friend says a bunch of you are meeting in pigeon forge and all chipping in to rent a house there for a week...

 

[Karlon]

Have you've ever been scammed or duped? Cheated on or deceived?

If so can you share so we can learn from it - I mean so we can learn to be wiser, and avoid those traps.
After you found out, what did you do? And did the person who scammed or duped you get any consequences..I mean did they go to jail or return your time or money or whatever it is they scammed you for?

Do you have any safety tips - aside from buckle up and put your seatbelt on!
I don't mean just 'watch for red flags' I mean things we need to really know before we hand over our money/lives/personal information. Or not give that out at all. Especially to someone who we never met before/doesn't have any friends to vouch for them/love bombs us.

way back, 1 of my brothers told me my g.f. cheated on me. it was never proven but my guess is she did. she was an alcoholic, she kicked me out of our relationship & i was glad of it. as time goes on, finding a g.f. becomes more like an interrogation. so many questions to ask & much checking too. i was duped on a few landscape jobs but later, sometimes much later, the customer would call me up for another job & i charged them more than it was worth just to cover myself. my boss at the factory cheated me out of income in this way: when he asked if i would do the landscape work at his house, i said that i would lose time at the factory which would result in less of an unemployment check in the winter. he said he would keep my timecard punched in. he never did. more than 30 years later, he called me to see if i wanted to purchase any antiques because he was moving. i went over & made some purchases. on 1 purchase which was an 1899 "chief one papa" large size $5, he wanted $20 & i agreed. i sold that for $400! & i surpassed my expectations on all else that i purchased. after i became a Christian, Jesus took care of anyone who duped me. safety tips: yeah, if anyone is a born again Christian, allow Jesus to correct everything: Hebrews 10:30- "wherefore we know Him that hath said: "vengeance belongeth unto Me, I will recompense saith the Lord. & again, the Lord shall judge His people". always pray to Jesus for guarding, protection & security. find some people who know what to say & do when trouble time visits you. blessings to you.

 

[Churchgoer]

Thank you for your kind words.

While I was in the country, I traveled to three different cities. I also went to the city where he lived. At a secure hotel, I spoke with some of the staff and a few local people. I showed them his photo and they recognized him. They told me who he was, where he lived, that he was married and even how many children he had.

That was how I found out the truth. It was heartbreaking, but at least I finally had answers.

You are very smart and brave at the hotel.

 

[JohnDB]

But what about when your online friend tells you that they've always wanted to meet you and need a travel buddy for an all expenses paid cruise? Is that a scam? Asking for a friend.

Only if you need to put up any sort of deposit for ANYTHING.

Because how many people actually know what a cruise ship boarding pass looks like?

 

[SoulFaith]

But what about when your online friend tells you that they've always wanted to meet you and need a travel buddy for an all expenses paid cruise? Is that a scam? Asking for a friend.

Hmm... I've actually been on a trip like that.

I met my pen pal and he paid for the entire trip. We each had our own hotel room and he simply wanted someone to travel with. We had talked on the phone a couple of times, but most of our communication had been through letters.

There was just one little white lie. He wasn't a 50 year old dance instructor who enjoyed jogging. He was a 75 year old retired gentleman. I have to admit, I was a little disappointed when I discovered the truth.

Still, I kept my promise and enjoyed the trip as his travel companion. He was kind and respectful and everything went well.

Even so, I'd encourage everyone to be careful. Not every story has a happy ending.

 

[JohnDB]

Have you've ever been scammed or duped? Cheated on or deceived?

If so can you share so we can learn from it - I mean so we can learn to be wiser, and avoid those traps.
After you found out, what did you do? And did the person who scammed or duped you get any consequences..I mean did they go to jail or return your time or money or whatever it is they scammed you for?

Do you have any safety tips - aside from buckle up and put your seatbelt on!
I don't mean just 'watch for red flags' I mean things we need to really know before we hand over our money/lives/personal information. Or not give that out at all. Especially to someone who we never met before/doesn't have any friends to vouch for them/love bombs us.

But but but....
That Nigerian Princess and coffee plantation heir needs my help....

Just a little bit....she said she loves me.

 

[Churchgoer]

Or your friend says a bunch of you are meeting in pigeon forge and all chipping in to rent a house there for a week...

Before meeting in person, no need to get into extravagant plan. 1st meeting should be simple at a public place, library, big store, or something, no need to be fancy, but need to be easy and public, no pressure for people to commit finance, time.... just casual.

It is like visiting a church, one will not commit on the first few time to be a member, correct?

 

[Churchgoer]

I personally would not accept any money offer from people. If I do, then it is a job, such as cooking, hosting, assisting. ...