Tell your member crush here

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CarolSampaio said:
Nah... I don't think that's it...

She's got that natural charm... ;)

The end up being like moths attracted to light... not the light's fault... it's just the way things are... :)

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D'awww, thanks Carol :)
 
Tintin said:
But I'm dance-impaired. And an Aussie.
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No one is totally dance-impaired... slow dancing was invented to make sure of that ;) and being an Aussie is a plus!! :)

Trust your game! ;) When you're confident, girls notice! And that's a fact! ;)
 
CarolSampaio said:
No one is totally dance-impaired... slow dancing was invented to make sure of that ;) and being an Aussie is a plus!! :)

Trust your game! ;) When you're confident, girls notice! And that's a fact! ;)
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Ah, slow-dancing. I remember those days. My first and last ever slow-dance was with a girl I really, really liked. Her party was a disco (weren't they all in the early to mid-90s? Haha). It was glorious.

Yes, thanks, Carol. I do need to grow in confidence.
 
CarolSampaio said:
No one is totally dance-impaired... slow dancing was invented to make sure of that ;) and being an Aussie is a plus!! :)

Trust your game! ;) When you're confident, girls notice! And that's a fact! ;)
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Takes notes ... but has some questions :confused:
 
Mitspa said:
lol....ok I know women are attracted to confidence in a man...but where do they draw the line between confidence and just ugly pride type stuff?
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When the guy goes from being confident to acting like a royal jerk..lol.. nobody likes a person who acts like a donkey.. and I know plenty of donkeys.. :/ lol
 
blue_ladybug said:
When the guy goes from being confident to acting like a royal jerk..lol.. nobody likes a person who acts like a donkey.. and I know plenty of donkeys.. :/ lol
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That don't help...:( when does confidence turn to be a jerk.... I know the answer...just trying to see if you guys do hehe
 
Mitspa said:
lol....ok I know women are attracted to confidence in a man...but where do they draw the line between confidence and just ugly pride type stuff?
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Wow... you don't aim low, do ya... hahahahaha

It's hard to explain... when a person is confident, they know who they are, they know their qualities, their faults, and they are fine with them! You know? They are comfortable in their own shoes!! :)

When a person is proud (that ugly pride, I mean) it's pedantic, it's pretentious... I don't know, it's easy to notice the difference, but kinda hard to put to words... hahahaha

I guess I'll go with that chinese saying that goes like this "When a bucket is full, it is silent. But if a bucket is half full, it makes noise"

:)
 
Mitspa said:
lol....ok I know women are attracted to confidence in a man...but where do they draw the line between confidence and just ugly pride type stuff?
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You can easily tell. The difference between confidence and cockiness is this: Confidence is when you feel good about yourselves, productive, confident, etc. It's not arrogant, it's not prideful, it's knowing that you can still be wrong in your mistakes because you're confident enough that you can be wrong. Cockiness typically involves itself with egotism and arrogance.

I am MORE attracted to men who are confident. When I feel like I need to speak into their lives, I'm fine with it, but I'm not God and their confidence doesn't come from me. It's happened several times and I'm just simply not attracted to that. I already do this as a life coach and as a person who works in the ministry. The least I ask from a guy is not to ask me to build you up. We are to compliment each other in the ways we act and to make each other a better person, but speaking into your insecurities in order to make you whole? No, that's just not fair to either me or to God.
 
CarolSampaio said:
Wow... you don't aim low, do ya... hahahahaha

It's hard to explain... when a person is confident, they know who they are, they know their qualities, their faults, and they are fine with them! You know? They are comfortable in their own shoes!! :)

When a person is proud (that ugly pride, I mean) it's pedantic, it's pretentious... I don't know, it's easy to notice the difference, but kinda hard to put to words... hahahaha

I guess I'll go with that chinese saying that goes like this "When a bucket is full, it is silent. But if a bucket is half full, it makes noise"

:)
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This is my understanding....a man who knows and likes who he is, is confident in who he is... a good woman is attracted to that.

A man who don't know or like who he is trying to put on show to be something and behind the mask is no real virtue...this a good woman will figure out....
 
I wouldn't mind some guide on how to become confident. That would come in handy. But people just say, "be more confident". Well, that's fine and dandy, but how? Ugh.
 
shineyourlight said:
You can easily tell. The difference between confidence and cockiness is this: Confidence is when you feel good about yourselves, productive, confident, etc. It's not arrogant, it's not prideful, it's knowing that you can still be wrong in your mistakes because you're confident enough that you can be wrong. Cockiness typically involves itself with egotism and arrogance.

I am MORE attracted to men who are confident. When I feel like I need to speak into their lives, I'm fine with it, but I'm not God and their confidence doesn't come from me. It's happened several times and I'm just simply not attracted to that. I already do this as a life coach and as a person who works in the ministry. The least I ask from a guy is not to ask me to build you up. We are to compliment each other in the ways we act and to make each other a better person, but speaking into your insecurities in order to make you whole? No, that's just not fair to either me or to God.
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You guys are great :)
 
Mitspa said:
This is my understanding....a man who knows and likes who he is, is confident in who he is... a good woman is attracted to that.

A man who don't know or like who he is trying to put on show to be something and behind the mask is no real virtue...this a good woman will figure out....
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Added note to my response to this a few posts ago....confidence are traits that are desirable to have from others. It draws people in because they are traits that are desirable.

Cockiness are traits that push people away and are less desirable to have. I mean, if you meet a cocky person, it's not as easy to love them as it is with a confident person.

5 facts about pride/cockiness
1) They can never admit that they are wront
2) They don't accept anyone's advice/input but does everything by themselves (becaues they don't need anyone)
3) Gets angry when they are being corrected or given advice.
4) Doesn't care about others, it's about them. They don't take others into account.
5) They need public and private recognition from people. doesn’t take others into account.

6 truths about confidence
1) They use wisdom to measure out their choices and actions
2) Values input and advice from others.
3) They proceed in selfless ambitions and not selfish ambitions.
4) They know they need others to help them and know they can't do it on their own.
5) They know who they are and who they aren't.
6) They know where they are gifted.
 
Tintin said:
I wouldn't mind some guide on how to become confident. That would come in handy. But people just say, "be more confident". Well, that's fine and dandy, but how? Ugh.
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Now that's the thing... :) I can try to answer this because I'm learning this now myself...

I stopped thinking about other people.. I mean, I stopped thinking about how to please them, how to impress them, I stopped caring so much about how to act so I could be more likable... :)

I just started to focus on me, and be myself regardless of what other people thought of it... I've actually had some male friends tell me that I am too much of a "guy" and I should act more like a "girl"... and you know what? I don't care a wit about what they think... I like who I am now... and I know the Lord likes who I am now because He made me like this... :)

And I know that when He wants me to find someone (if He wants it), He will introduce us... and he will like me the way I am... :)
 
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