Today I went on my husband's computer, he has been acting strange recently so I went to check his browsing history. He had been watching videos of father's running over their children and of Isis beheadings! I just found out and I'm terrified. I don't know what to do but I am so scared. Christmas is in a few days and I want to survive the holidays but I am scared. I don't know who to tell, or if I should confront him. I have a 1 year old daughter and he has been violent once but that was 9 months ago
Terrified: Husband watches raw Gore
- Thread starter MariaJoy01
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Just to clarify our relationship is not good and he has been very angry and temperamental. I honestly don't know what to do. I am scared and concerned about his mental health and my and my daughter's safety. When I mentioned Christmas I don't want to just disappear on him right then. I don't know what to think or do.
Hubby needs help, and you need to leave and get to a safe place before he decides to go all homicide-bomber on you..
If he does have a problem, the holidays are a stressful time that may exacerbate his dysfunction. But, this has to be your call.
J
joefizz
Guest
Probably not,what you have discovered is that he is building the evil within him to motivate himself to kill someone,which whether you are his target or not I agree with blue lady bug get to a safe place before he goes ballistic because whether he attacks you or not if you stay around him you can be counted as "accessory" to what he probably will do,so leave somewhere or stay with someone you trust.
I agree with this, and also, in case it needs to be said: don't tell him where you're going.
T
toinena
Guest
If you are afraid, you should leave. I don't know his motivation for watching those videos. Some watch ISIL beheadings to nurture their hate towards Muslims and that is a thing you can talk about in a neutral manner. Sick? Yes. But not a threat to you. Those father running over kids sounds like sick humour, too. But I am not sure if he identifies with them. Have you noticed he has turned more aggressive? Then move out. Otherwise talk and try to let him see himself as a father and husband with responsibilities.
J
joefizz
Guest
Yeah whatever you do don't mention what you have discovered of him or what your plans are because "he'll seek you as a target if he hasn't already".
What should do when I do leave? Do I just disappear? Should I leave a note why I am leaving? Do I get a restraining order? What about custody?
D
Depleted
Guest
Wisdom isn't taking the suggestions of strangers to make such life changing decisions.
you need to call and work with the battered womans people they will help you with all of this they even go as far as helping you relocate and change your names this is very serious if he is being that weird do not say crap to him call the battered womans hotline in your area and go to a shelter and have them help you with getting away and filing for a divorce and with the custody of your child etc.... Be careful and leave when he is not home like if he works do it while he is at work...
I pray for your safety and for you to call the battered womans people to get away from this man don't make the mistake I made and think it is no big deal it is a very big deal and it will stay a big deal... Bless you and I will pray for you.
Don't leave any note.. Leave and go somewhere safe. If he's incompetent as a father, go for full custody..
U
Ugly
Guest
I'm afraid my husband could be violent. But I don't want to ruin Christmas...??? What kind of backwards logic is that?
Really no one can suggest anything about your husband's mental state or intentions. Your husband may be feeding something violent within him, or he may be going through a phase where he is curious about such violence.
I, for one, used to read and watch about serial killers and whatnot. I also have never been violent nor do i have any desires to be so. I find the mindset behind people fascinating, but not the acts themselves. But you can't separate the two.
It's up to you to decide if there are enough reasons to think he's dangerous. If you feel you have enough reason then it's time to stop worrying about holidays and other insignificant things and take action.
Really no one can suggest anything about your husband's mental state or intentions. Your husband may be feeding something violent within him, or he may be going through a phase where he is curious about such violence.
I, for one, used to read and watch about serial killers and whatnot. I also have never been violent nor do i have any desires to be so. I find the mindset behind people fascinating, but not the acts themselves. But you can't separate the two.
It's up to you to decide if there are enough reasons to think he's dangerous. If you feel you have enough reason then it's time to stop worrying about holidays and other insignificant things and take action.
J
joefizz
Guest
Exactly a person should be thinking on "am I safe" not "will I ruin a holiday"? or other such things,what matters is "if you feel safe" Maria joy,if you feel "unsafe" then don't worry about "what your leaving behind" the top priority here is "are you in danger",alot of women including my own mother have hung around evil guys that make women feel "too self conscious" thinking on a bunch of small what ifs instead of seeking to "fix a problem" it doesn't matter one bit what we advise here,what matters is "You" if you believe this to be a cause for concern that could endanger you or others then "get away" from this guy,if you think it's just some odd thing that he just watches because he's upset or has a reason that's not questionable then stay with him and tell him it bothers you.
But like I said "You" have to decide what you believe and stick with it,we can't decide things for you,all we can do is give advice in good faith and hope it helps you "come to a decision",obviously you came here because you wanted an "outsider's opinion" now you have some opinions,facts,and constructive advice,that you can either accept or not,if anything else pray to God for answers and let him lead you,we can only help so much.
MariaJoy01 - you need to contact the authorities and request their professional advise.
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K
kaylagrl
Guest
You said he has been violent,thats your cue. Get out asap. Dont let him know,don't leave a note. Go to a shelter and they'll help you with what to do next. Its imperative that you leave. Once he has been violent once he will do it again.If you can't do it for yourself,do it for your daughter. She'll do what she sees you do. So get out and you will find help.