The Dangers of Presumption & Haste

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Jullianna

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Do you post the first thing that comes to mind or do you give yourself some time to mull your posts over a bit? Have you ever posted something in haste, maybe even something negative or sarcastic, only to return and find yourself way off base and sounding like a doofus? Do you try to read things from a perspective other than your own whenever possible? Are you open to considering it? Do you read with a judgmental eye rather than a loving eye? Does it poison your words at times, no matter how well intended? Do you ever wish some of your posts would disappear into cybergumbyland forever? :)

I'm finding myself reading threads a time or two before posting these days. Don't mean to ignore anyone, but there's a lot of wisdom in that "slow to speak" thing. :) Helps me not to choke on my foot as often. Anyone else?
 
The only times I respond quickly are when the subject being discussed is something I have already been thinking about so it's easier to express my thoughts.
Eveytime I post I use the preview button and read it back to myself, and then I re-read the post I am responding too to be sure I stayed on topic as I can wander away quite easily.

When I read it's usually with a curious eye.

I haven't regretted many posts in the sense that I think I was wrong to post what I did, but I have thought that some were not necessary, either because they were redundant or because they achieved nothing, by which I mean the person I was responding too was clearly never going to hear me, but either ignore or misunderstand, sometimes on purpose.

I try to never read my own posts again to avoid that moment where I ask myself 'what was I thinking?', which used to happen a lot!
 
It takes me forever to post most of the time because I read things through so many times and make changes, and still regret some of them. :)

There are certain types of threads I don't like to post in at all, but feel led to. Don't care for that much, but it is what it is.

And I hate being redundant so if I see a couple of posts saying what I want to say, I usually won't post. And then, if it's a friend's thread, I worry that they'll think I've ignored their thread. :)
 
Jullianna said:
And I hate being redundant so if I see a couple of posts saying what I want to say, I usually won't post. And then, if it's a friend's thread, I worry that they'll think I've ignored their thread. :)
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Yes I understand that, I have made posts on account of the person asking rather than the question being asked/subject being raised.

Sometimes I do it as well because a thread can set me thinking about something and even if it's been said before I just need get the thoughts out of my head, to express them in some way so that I can get beyond them.
I also think that if there are repetitve replies then it can be helpful to the OP, it shows them how strongly people feel and that can give them greater assurance than if it is just one or two people.

I find myself reading more and posting less nowadays.
 
I try to make sure I understand before posting, but sometimes the question is very confusing or I have trouble just trying to figure out what the OP is trying to say. In cases like that I sometimes give it my best shot, but most of the time I pass on it. I can't tell you how many times I have written a post and deleted it before posting though. I do it a lot. Most of the time its because its something long and I catch myself and realize that no one will care or agree with what I am writing so I just delete it.
 
I get that, Gabe. :) I don't want to ignore anyone or be rude, but I don't want to argue either, and sometimes you know that if you respond in certain situations the person isn't really reading what you're saying, that it won't be received well no matter how you phrase it, and that all it will do is encourage a debate you really don't want to be sucked into and likely further enable someone to derail a thread. Sooo...being able to delete posts is kewl beans. :)
 
Do i even think twice before posting, not sure anywayz..

But i hardly regret my posts.. I'm always right..lol
 
I don't post as often anymore either.

For me it has to do with the direction of the thread. I don't like pouring something meaningful to me into a post only to see 2 posts later that its just be taken over by a picture of a Cat with miscellaneous subtitles. I can become very passionate about some subjects and at the same time because of that I will not post if I believe that what I believe will not be received by more than a few select people.
 
Jullianna said:
I get that, Gabe. :) I don't want to ignore anyone or be rude, but I don't want to argue either, and sometimes you know that if you respond in certain situations the person isn't really reading what you're saying, that it won't be received well no matter how you phrase it, and that all it will do is encourage a debate you really don't want to be sucked into and likely further enable someone to derail a thread. Sooo...being able to delete posts is kewl beans. :)
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Well I think I have a pretty good idea now of how certain viewpoints will be received in these forums so I sometimes write something from the heart and then catch myself writing something that I know most or all people here will probably not even consider because it goes against their way of thinking, so I delete it before it ever gets posted.
 
You never know.... What you have to say may make all of the difference to those one or two people, cat or no cat. :)

What we get out of a topic or what we bring to it is dependant largely upon where we are at the time. A handful of people can be going in different directions that aren't necessarily wrong, but simply not applicable to all or by all. If we can impact or BE impacted in an edifying way, it's worth the effort.

AND..as wyler was saying...there are times when we may not edify anyone other than ourselves by typing out feelings we really don't want to have, but, even then, others can be affected in positive ways, even if it's just the realization that we aren't alone, we aren't as defective as we might think, we're still works in progress, and that God hasn't given up on us just because we still have junk we need to dump.
 
zeroturbulence said:
Well I think I have a pretty good idea now of how certain viewpoints will be received in these forums so I sometimes write something from the heart and then catch myself writing something that I know most or all people here will probably not even consider because it goes against their way of thinking, so I delete it before it ever gets posted.
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I understand :)
 
Another thing I want to guard against is the appearance of self-righteousness....that's the dangerzone. We can get so wrapped up in our OWN walks to the point that we miss how we are affecting others and can actually cause them to stumble. Balance is crucial.

There is a time to chill. There's a time to rest. There's a time to approach topics and individuals from a more sophisticated perspective and a time to climb down from our high horses and be more approachable so as not to discourage those who are younger in the faith.
 
Usually the first thing i think in my head is what i really mean. I rarely wish i could take back something i said in these forums.
I dont like to beat around the bush using lots of big words and phrases to get my point across.
Sometimes i know i can come off as a bit.... rude? or harsh maybe? but im certainly not meaning it that way. It really is just my personality to be straight foward i guess.

I really should think more about the words i use though, i myself am not easily offended, but other people may be more sensitive to certain things and i tend to forget that.
 
Liamson said:
For me it has to do with the direction of the thread. I don't like pouring something meaningful to me into a post only to see 2 posts later that its just be taken over by a picture of a Cat with miscellaneous subtitles.
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I feel that way sometimes too, like there is a time and place for satire and sometimes there are threads with a serious subject but then something appears that moves it toward being a joke thread, and it's fine of course, but when that happens I can't see any point in posting something serious because no-one will care.
 
NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
Usually the first thing i think in my head is what i really mean. I rarely wish i could take back something i said in these forums.
I dont like to beat around the bush using lots of big words and phrases to get my point across.
Sometimes i know i can come off as a bit.... rude? or harsh maybe? but im certainly not meaning it that way. It really is just my personality to be straight foward i guess.

I really should think more about the words i use though, i myself am not easily offended, but other people may be more sensitive to certain things and i tend to forget that.
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Holly, I have to say that your directness is one of the things I admire most about you. :)
 
It sounds like I might be a lot like you Jullianna. I tend to go back and reread what I write several times over... then half the time I don't post it anyways. I'm a worry-wart by nature, so I tend to worry a lot about whether something I said was taken wrong or if I sounded stupid, etc.

Like right now? I've read this tiny little things four times, and I'm thinking about not posting it.... but... I'm going to anyhow. :-P
 
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