The Dating Disaster thread

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zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
Aug 2, 2009
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OK, I can't remember if this has been done before, but it can't hurt to do it again right?

Please tell us your dating disaster stories! Because we all need a good laugh (or cry) :)
 
When I was 14, I asked a boy out to the dance. In my lil mind, we were automatically a "couple". Our first "date" was trick-o-treating with his family. The boy's friend "broke up" with me two weeks later over the phone, and then the boy showed up to school the next day with shaved eyebrows colored in with green permanent marker.

Before him, though, I was "dating" a 13 year old, but I broke up with him after a week because he was too "annoying".

Then I was interested in a wiccan.

Then the next guy I liked turned gay.


lol I'm so glad I got saved. Yay for Jesus rescuing me from such idiocy!!!
 
Me and this guy had been dating i dunno maybe like 6 months when he told me, he wanted us to continue seeing each other, but he liked really skinny women. So he says, i really like you, and i really think your hot, but i would like you even more if you lost 10 pounds.... Yeah let me get right on that :rolleyes:



When i was about 17 One guy i was dating told me he would settle for me, but what he really wanted was my sister. hahahah i love that one


I had been dating the same guy for about a year or more. We were engaged actually. So he takes me to my favorite place to eat... where the whole entire night he does nothing but look our waitress up and down, and smile and flirt with her. By the end of the dinner he had gotten her number....
and i had taken his car keys left him at the resturant and drove home.

This one above all is my favorite.

This wasnt to long ago, this guy i had been out with maybe 3 or 4 times says he wants to take me to this show,and i should wear something that easy to get out of for after the show.......
hahahah that always makes me laugh to think about!!


Great idea for a thread zero!! Remembering all of this stuff really has made me laugh a lot!! :D
 
My first real boyfriend took me out one night for a movie. His plan was to see a horror movie so that anytime I'd get scared I'd have more incentive to cuddle on to the guy close to me for protection. Unfortunately he didn't know me very well, but had he, he would have known I am a HUGE horror buff and I love me some scary films, especially the awful ones because they're almost amusingly awful. But the other thing he didn't take into account was he is very easily scared... and I mean VERY easily scared. So instead of his master plan of being the heroic boyfriend there to comfort my fears away, he ended up being the frightened damsel screaming every 2 seconds and clinging on to me. Even asked me to tell him when it was okay to look at one point.

He took me to another movie a week later, I don't remember which movie it was, I just remember the opening scene because he pulled yet another amusing blunder. The movie opened with a wife getting yelled at and belittled by her obviously abusive husband, and he just kept ripping into her over everything while she was trying to make him breakfast. My boyfriend leans over in the middle of this and says, "If we get married, I will never ever treat you like that," trying to make the mood romantic somehow... I leaned over and said, "You even try to treat me like that, your butt will hit the pavement so fast it'll hit you back."

The final funny blunder with him (I know it sounds like I'm being hard on him, but the other boyfriends I had never had as many funny blunders), was when we went and saw Talladega Nights. For those of you who haven't seen it, it's a comedy about a Nascar racer who is trying to beat this French guy who is very very openly gay. There's a scene in it where two guys kiss. Now, I was pretty sheltered growing up, but even I knew about homosexuality. My boyfriend at the time on the other hand kind of knew about it, but was in denial that people actually do that. Anyways the scene happens where two guys kiss, and my boyfriend, who had an extra large cup of cherry coke, let out the girliest scream I have ever heard come out of a guy, jumped to cover his eyes, and sent his cup flying on me... so for the rest of the night I was modeling his cherry coke.

Needless to say it didn't work out between us lol
 
I once had a boyfriend so sweet he cooked me dinner. He bought batterd fish from a deli that you fry yourself. He knew I was on a diet so he baked them. The fish came out of the oven looking like bleached dog terds on a hot summers day and was hard too.Then I tried the salad he made. I took one bite then asked him if he knew the difference between lettice and cabbage.lol. It was the worst dinner I had but he won brownie points for trying.
 
LOVE LOVE those stories, Vikkikate!! Glad I don't care much for movies, cuz I don't want any of that to happen ;)
 
Well, not to long ago...on another thread I shared my *monster truck date night*....I shall spare you all from having to live through it again LOL

I've never reallly had another that could top that one anyway. LOL :P
 
grace said:
Well, not to long ago...on another thread I shared my *monster truck date night*....I shall spare you all from having to live through it again LOL

I've never reallly had another that could top that one anyway. LOL :P
Click to expand...


hahaha monster truck date night!! I can only imagine!
 
CatWoman said:
I once had a boyfriend so sweet he cooked me dinner. He bought batterd fish from a deli that you fry yourself. He knew I was on a diet so he baked them. The fish came out of the oven looking like bleached dog terds on a hot summers day and was hard too.Then I tried the salad he made. I took one bite then asked him if he knew the difference between lettice and cabbage.lol. It was the worst dinner I had but he won brownie points for trying.
Click to expand...


hahahahahahaha!!!
 
I lived in the country as a teen and once when a guy was taking me to a movie in the rain, his car got BADLY hung up in the mud and he had to be pushed out. The truck that came along and pushed him out broke out both of his headlights and really messed up the front of his car. We were both soaked and covered with mud, so when a neighbor of mine came by, I rode home with the neighbor and called the guy's dad to come out there. I didn't think I would ever hear from him again, but I did. :)
 
LOL.... I know, its funny. *shrugs* I probably have enough material for a book @ this point. Oh well, it makes for a funny memory now @ least. :P
 
There was this girl....
We were on this Jet Ski, the most powerful of its kind. It was a 4 cylinder Ocean going Jet-Ski and it felt like a chopper. It was the 4th of July and we were at my Girlfriends company picnic. Her company owned a Ridiculous monster Jet Ski and I have to admit that I was a little afraid of it at first. So we were messing around on the Jet Ski in the bay, jumping off wakes and doing doughnuts. We were laughing and having too much fun Until.... I was going about 35ish and hit a wave in the middle of a turn. It sent the Jet Ski through the air sideways and when we landed we were both tossed. I popped up laughing and yelled, "Your turn!" SHE screamed and her ankle floated to the surface and looked like it was smuggling golf balls. So I snatched the back of her vest swam her to shore and returned the Jet ski to the beach. When I drove the car around, there was an ambulance on the beach where I left her. I was like, "Really? we called an ambulance?"

I followed the ambulance to the hospital. When I got there, she was Screaming that I broke her ankle and how evil I was for not listening as she was screaming at the top of her lungs for me to slow down the whole time. They took X-rays and the swelling had gone down by the time she was done there. They discovered that her leg/ankle wasn't broken. It was a sprain with some bruising. She practically walked out of the hospital with some ice and some pain medication.

It was then that I discovered something about my girlfriend, she had never broken a bone (still hasn't) or been injured in any way beyond like a paper cut ever.

So I suppose I ruined the date but, I also learned a valuable lesson. :)
 
I remembered one final funny dating story. This was actually right at the end of my relationship with the boyfriend I mentioned before. Something I didn't mention was he is a high functioning autistic person which pretty much was the reason for some of his behavior, but the thing with him was his family is tighter than an Italian mafia family. You mess with one of them and you've messed with all of them. His older brother had decided he hated me (I still don't know why, the only thing I'd ever said that seemed to get him upset with me was I told him I hated rap music), and decided he wanted me out of the picture, so he started telling my boyfriend stories that weren't true, but of course he was going to take the word of his family over mine because that's how he had been raised and that's how his brain was wired. Eventually it all boiled down to his brother finally making up a story that he had seen me in a movie theater with another guy, who was a friend of mine, and said that we had been holding hands and making out. My boyfriend of course believed it at first until I finally argued with him that it wasn't true and got him to start to see that because he knew what I was like as a person that there was no way I'd ever cheat (I promise this gets funny).

So after about a month of just rockiness and struggling to work things out we were finally starting to get back on track and we went out for a date just before Christmas where we exchanged gifts. And we were sitting in the restaurant talking and I told him, "I'm glad this is finally over. I promise there is nothing going on between me and Alex." No sooner had I said those words when there game a knock at the window we were sitting at, and we looked over and there was Alex, smiling and waving at me. I had forgotten he worked there and his timing couldn't have been worse LOL. I tried so hard not to start laughing, even after my boyfriend shot me the, "Oh really?" look, because only I could have that rotten of luck lol. Alex and I still laugh about it to this day. Sometimes all you can do is laugh, lol.
 
I went on a date, I don't date much because my schedule does not allow it taking time off of work and making time for a sitter to be with my daughter, and I thought the world of this girl. She was gorgeous, nice really sweet and alot of my friends who knew her said she was an awesome chick. I picked her up and we went out. She picked the place and we went there. Turns out her ex-boyfriend worked there and she wants to make him jealous. So the whole night she is throwing herself at me in the most unattractive ways. I am just not that type of guy but finally as we are leaving she goes to stand up and her heel catches the hem of her skirt and as she stands pulls it down. She was so embarrassed that i couldn't even laugh. I dropped her off and drove half a block and couldn't stop laughing for like 5 min.
 
The last date I went on (three years ago, but don't tell anybody) was strange. So I met this guy online as my friends suggested and we communicated back and forth for a while and then decided to meet up at a local restaurant, and yes my friends were there too as back up. He had a gap in work history so I asked him why and he told me he was in seminary to be a priest for several years during that time and was kicked out for opening a checking account. So from then on I kept picturing him with the little white collar.

We went on a second date alone this time and it was okay but I knew there was no connection. At the end of the night he took me home and he tried to kiss me and I gasped and probably made a very hideous face because he stopped and just stared at me. I said bye and promptly ran into my house.

A few days later I told him we shouldnt see each other anymore.
 
I was 14 when I first started 'dating'.

I can't remember his name but he was my first kiss (while we were both on mountain bikes believe it or not!)
When my parents found out they told me to invite this boy round to dinner. During the dinner I found out that since he was 5 he has always refused to eat anything for dinner except red meat and potatoes. Nothing wrong with meat and potatoes but being picky enough to refuse vegetables, pasta, seafood and all sorts of other food options astounded me (negatively).

I was raised to eat what was put in front of me and having the cheek to pick at whatever meal my mother made for us was the biggest insult you could throw at her efforts and I remember watching in horror as this boy demanded lemonade instead of chocolate milk (bought especially for the occaision), as well as picking the mince and cheese out of mums yummy lasagne and ignoring the salad she put on his plate.
Oh the embarressment...

Insulting my mother with his weird eating habits was the deal breaker for me.
 
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