Tired of living

  • Thread starter Thread starter The_boy
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BELIEVE ME , I KNOW HOW BAD STUFF CAN GET. TRUST ME, IT WILL GET BETTER AND JESUS WILL CARRY YOU EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. I'VE HAD SOME TOUGH TIMES TOO. FOR EXAMPLE-MY MOM WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A RARE DISEASE BACK IN 2009, SHE SLOWLY GOT WORSE AND WORSE TILL SHE DIED IN APRIL OF THIS YEAR. AFTER THAT MY DAD STARTED HAVE HEART PROBLEMS, HE ENDED UP HAVEING A 4-WAY BYPASS IN AUGUST, WE ALSO FOUND OUT HE HAS A LEAKY HEART VALVE (THANKFULLY IT'S NOT BAD ENOUGH TO HAVE TO REPLACE IT YET), AND WE RECENTLY FOUND OUT HE HAS A KIDNEY STONE THAT WILL HAVE TO BE REMOVED SURGICALLY. MY SISTER AND HER BOYFRIEND HAVE MOVED BACK TO TOWN, AND EVEN THOUGH I SHOW LOVE TOWARDS HER SHE HAS NOTHING BUT HATE FOR ME. AND THEIR ARRIVAL HAS BROUGHT FOURTH TOO MAY PROBLEMS TO LIST. SO I KNOW ABOUT HARD TIMES AND FAMILY STRIFE.

SOMETIMES I FEEL SO LOST AND ALONE, BUT I KNOW ALL I HAVE TO DO IS JUST TELL JESUS THAT I'VE DONE ALL I CAN TO TRY TO TAKE CARE OF THESE PROBLEMS, AND I CAN'T FIX THEM MYSELF, AND THAT I GIVE ALL MY PROBLEMS TO HIM. GUESS WHAT HAPPEN WHEN I DO THAT. THE PROBLEMS ARE STILL THERE, BUT THEY DON'T SEEM AS BIG, AND ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, THINGS TURN OUT FOR THE BEST!

IT'S SO COOL HOW HE CAN TAKE YOUR PROBLEMS AND MAKE THEM EITHER GO AWAY, OR AT LEAST NOT SEEM AS BAD AS THEY ONCE WHERE.JUST GIVE YOUR PROBLEMS TO JESUS, HE'LL HELP YOU GET THROUGH THEM.
 
I wish I could give you a hug, give you a smile, give you anything but pointless words typed on a computer screen for you to read. I understand that you are hurting. I understand that you want it all to end. but what you don't understand is this. we need others to help us in times like this. we can't face it alone. I knowwww that this has been said before, and I know its not what you are looking for... but try to find a counselor... a priest... a suicide hotline number.... (it is 800-273-8255 if you want it...) and accept the fact that you are not alone. you are never alone. I garantee that if you were to privately message anyone on this site... they would talk to you as long as you needed.

I'm not going to pray for someone to kill you. I"m not going to pray for you to "see the error of your ways" and all that stuff you've already heard. I'm going to pray for you to find inner peace, whatever your method might be. but I don't believe that that method will be suicide. live your life. live it to the fullest. you can start over right now, if you let yourself.
 
I was also disowned by my Dad when I joined a Christian church that was not of his choice. He was like an unltraconservative. He made me feel worthless, rebellious, and something much less than a Christian. But I was only 20 years old at the time and trying to find someone, something to love. I know the hurt when your own family rejects you or your good intentions. It is like someone said once, "if you Mom (or family) doesn't love you, who does?" It is the worst hurt in the world. Believe me, I know. But I did recover after a period of time. Keep trying--sometimes just being busy at something--your job, a project, or helping someone else can help. And please consider a good counselor. A good counselor can help you--one step at a time and can be a person to lean on for a while until you regain your sense of worth. I hope tomorrow the sun shines in your life. I will pray for you too.
 
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