Pornography is a real jerk, ya' know? Seems like everyone I know was addicted at one point or another. For me, it's been almost seven years of beating the hell outta' myself for being such a failure. A failure to me, as I honesty believed I was done a year ago. A failure to my mom, who believed that I could, with God's help, pull myself out of the gutter and into the light. And worst of all, a failure to my King, who gave His all to save me, but I seem to have deliberately greased myself up and slipped out from his grasp. Believe me, if I had my way, I'd already be cured. But I guess that I'm just a worthless animal, through and through. I don't want to be like this, always hating myself and pointlessly apologizing to God for my wrongdoings. I wanna be free, I just don't know how to be.