"What's the frequency Kenneth?"

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38miles

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I haven't listened to secular music in a long time but it's all still in there. Well, that's not true because my one Pandora station at work places some secular stuff but by Christians, but this REM song is in my head despite not hearing that song in at least five years at least. But I'm thinking about it now because I'm like asking God, "What's your frequency?" And I'm asking this because I am flat out petitioning Him to move over my life, our life, and intervene in the way that I believe His word indicates is His will. But I am so lost in all of it and I so much want to speak my words over this trial, but knowing that my words will only further destroy and intensify the trial. It is a precipice and I am supposed to just trust? It would be so much easier if I knew His exact frequency. Though I guess that would be His word....but I'm asking His prayer frequency. Oh to know that one...


Emailed my counselor today and he reminded me not to push the issue and not to give ultimatums. My downfall. I literally have spent hours in gut wrenching prayer, screaming out to God through guttural cries, "Do it now." I don't come out of these feeling unanswered or let down, in fact I feel peace to simply say, "thank you! I know you're here." But I do feel like I'm going to burst a puffa valve or something...maybe explode my jugular? I am indeed a crazy person. I say, "if anyone else saw me right now God...whoa...they'd say 'he got a demon!'


In all things, Matthew 19:26 be by strongest grip. With me all this is impossible, but with God...amazing!
 
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