I know Iv asked this before but I'm asking again. I am currently engaged getting married a month from today. My parents don't like him and I hate picking between them. I know my spouse comes after God once we are married but as of right now should my parents come first? I am still in there home.
Who comes after God?
- Thread starter Acr96
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Well if there is a good reason for the dislike then they probably just want what's best for. Your parents do deserve great respect and more than likely have learn a thing or to from experience. But that's if you have good parents. Bad parents are still to be respected but other than that I would go off of how spiritual mature is the guy and do you believe he will help your faith grow or only become a problem pulling you away from God. He also needs to be trying to put God first. This is ideal at least.
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Depleted
Guest
I would not have married my husband if my father didn't give his blessing. I do believe in "honor your father and mother."
(Granted, I would have kept potential-hubby hang around Dad enough that Dad would have come to like him, but because I know hubby is likeable, and Dad was relatively reasonable. Dad always told me what was wrong with my boyfriends after we broke up, so at least we had communications down pretty well.)
(Granted, I would have kept potential-hubby hang around Dad enough that Dad would have come to like him, but because I know hubby is likeable, and Dad was relatively reasonable. Dad always told me what was wrong with my boyfriends after we broke up, so at least we had communications down pretty well.)
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LaurenTM
Guest
have you sat down with your parents and discussed why they do not like your fiance?
you cannot change 'alliances' or respect simply because you move out of their home...respecting your parents does not stop at the door...right?
respecting your parents also does not mean doing whatever they say etc and certainly does not mean accepting abuse
however, it DOES mean weigh their words...consider what they have to say...
I think you might want to take into consideration what their concerns are...
you may also know why they do not care for the man you are going to marry
be careful here...there is a funny expression...marry in haste, repent in leisure
if you intend to be married for life, you might consider how you are beginning your married life
you cannot change 'alliances' or respect simply because you move out of their home...respecting your parents does not stop at the door...right?
respecting your parents also does not mean doing whatever they say etc and certainly does not mean accepting abuse
however, it DOES mean weigh their words...consider what they have to say...
I think you might want to take into consideration what their concerns are...
you may also know why they do not care for the man you are going to marry
be careful here...there is a funny expression...marry in haste, repent in leisure
if you intend to be married for life, you might consider how you are beginning your married life
This is a call you are going to have to make. Parents have the job of looking out after you and giving you the best advice possible. Still, they make mistakes. I think you should carefully consider their words before getting married. They might be wrong, but once you're married, you're married.
Most of the time parents have your best interest at heart. I'm not saying that they are always right, but like Lauren said I would sit down with them and listen to their reasoning. Marriage is a life changing event so it is wise to think it through completely and weigh all evidence before committing.
if you have access to a 'neutral party', whom you have a lot of trust in,
and who you know Loves and Serves Jesus,
perhaps you could ask their advice/counsel...
may Jesus bless all of you and may you follow His Rules concerning righteousness...
and who you know Loves and Serves Jesus,
perhaps you could ask their advice/counsel...
may Jesus bless all of you and may you follow His Rules concerning righteousness...
Does your father approve, or just approve reluctantly? In the Old Testament, we read about father's giving their daughters in marriage. If a man seduced a virgin, he had to marry her, but only if her father would give her in marriage. The New Testament also speaks of giving in marriage.
The idea of two young people going out and finding a spouse on their own without their parents having anything to do with it is a western notion that has evolved over the past couple of centuries, not something the Bible teaches. The Bible says to honor your father and your mother.
J
JustinDVW
Guest
Be careful when choosing a spouse, Breaking hearts is a sin, from what God spoken to me, make sure that he or she is the one that you can spend your whole life with. Old saying till death do us part. God does not like how in modern society a lot of people only marry for lust, don't lust. I personally believe in life long commitments. Unless your Spouse is abusing
you verbally or and physically their really is no excuse to divorce just to marry someone else. My great grand parents marred in their early 20's and died at age 89 & 91. still married
My 74 year old grandmother has married once then divorced due to abuse and never remarried or dated another man. As she says she will always love my grandpa but she just cannot live with him. therefore only marry someone who you truly love or it is a sin. Divorce should not valid unless both parties do not love one another.
you verbally or and physically their really is no excuse to divorce just to marry someone else. My great grand parents marred in their early 20's and died at age 89 & 91. still married
My 74 year old grandmother has married once then divorced due to abuse and never remarried or dated another man. As she says she will always love my grandpa but she just cannot live with him. therefore only marry someone who you truly love or it is a sin. Divorce should not valid unless both parties do not love one another.
Sometimes parents can see 'red flags' that their children, who are younger and have never been married, cannot see.
Your parents come first until your married, then your husband comes first. Listen to your parents and consider their objections to this guy. Your welfare is their concern and they obviously don't think your fiancee is in your best interest. Does he have a good job that can support the 2 of you? Does he drink or do drugs? If your parents reasons are frivolous, ignore them, if serious, listen to them, and if your unsure, wait... jmo
IMO Justin has great advice,let me add that you must be aware that when you swear on the Bible in marriage then go against your vows that's lying, not to your spouse but to God.
Many young people make mistakes because part of being young is being impulsive,don't let the heat of the moment allow you to make a mistake that you could regret for life and beyond.
Many young people make mistakes because part of being young is being impulsive,don't let the heat of the moment allow you to make a mistake that you could regret for life and beyond.
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Depleted
Guest
Im not married I'd never do that to myself,but from what I understand in the US it's custom.
Im not here to argue with you as much as you'd like that.
Im not here to argue with you as much as you'd like that.
You are probably one of those catholics that doesn't follow the laws of the land because you are above them right? Ok I get it.
Do they have to do that if the judge marries them?You swore on a Bible in marriage?
D
Depleted
Guest
I've never heard of anyone swearing on a Bible to get married.
And, wow! You have telepathy, so you know what I'd like? Cool.
D
Depleted
Guest
Buzzz.
There goes telepathy. You're just one of those people who likes ti insult someone, instead of simply mentioning you made a mistake. You know absolutely nothing about the RCC, but, hey. You think everyone is like you, so I'll never know that's a crock too.
Anythin else you want to say to try to bolster up yourself?
D