Some people subconsciously look for a way to destroy themselves. Maybe they were emotionally abused as a child, and inwardly feel that they aren't allowed to succeed, so as a result they make decisions that will ensure they don't in fact succeed!
I read something in Romans 8 the other day that really hit home to me on this subject in relation to self destructive thinking, and it might apply to your topic here.
5Those who live according to the
sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the
Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6
The mind of sinful man[e] is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; 7the sinful mind[
f] is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. 8Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.
There are two things the mind can focus on, and each yields different outcomes.
You can focus on what the sinful nature wants, but the end result is death and destruction.
You can focus on what the Spirit wants and the end result is life and peace.
So how does this apply to your topic?
It's clear the Holy Spirit wants us to have lives of life and peace. (I'm not saying our entire life will be perfect here, but if we make the right decisions and put our mind on things of the Spirit, we'll have a life more in accordance with what God wants and we'll have an inward peace.)
So if you find yourself having behaviors that are constantly self destructing yourself, it may be a sign your mind is focused on the things of the sinful nature and not of the Holy Spirit.
Get your mind focused and in accordance with the things the Holy Spirit wants, and the end result will be life and peace. And again, I'm not talking about things in life being perfect. But they will be in accordance with God's will. Which in the end is life and peace.
Because if your mind is on the things the Holy Spirit wants, then you'll be making good choices and good decisions. And the Holy Spirit isn't out to make you self destruct. The sinful nature is out to self destruct you though.