50 Shades of Grey is Women's Porn

[Human]

The need for sex would clearly be the arousal of your genitals. Though it in itself isnt really even a need, as in you will not have adverse affects from ignoring it besides maybe stress, which is just a normal part of daily living anyways, God does allow us to take a spouse and fulfill that need because it leads to something beautiful, giving God children. There is no part of your physical body that tells you "I need to be tied up and hurt/ tie up someone and hurt them". It is a desire to pervert what God has created. God has strict guidelines with sex. Bondage is clearly not a part of it, merely the fulfillment of personal desire, and we are told that the source of ALL sin is desire.

If you think the need to sex is just about your genitals, then you've clearly never had sex. People don't always father or mother children, sex is also about fun, pleasure, experimentation, bonding, enjoyment, fulfillment, spontaneity, passion, desire. It's about lots of things other than furthering children.

As for desire, it is absolutely necessary ​in a partnership.

 

[Human]

Then the next thing you know they take it further and you ain't doing it for em anymore... so you get taken out of the equation.

That's such a repressed thing to say. Your partner is more likely to leave you (whether that's taking the car and kids, or withdrawing emotionally and physically) if you're sexually dull than if you make an effort to fulfill her desires.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

Come on man. Sex is supposed to be passionate. Lust is a healthy part of a monogamous relationship. IN fact, the bible tells people who lust, to marry. That tells me that this lust is meant to be projected onto a partner.

Not really, it tells you that if you may marry to fulfill your physical needs, which we both know what that means. Desires are not needs. We grow up in schools being taught the difference between wants and needs, but we never really learn it, do we? : p

But no, he who loves the ways of the earth does not have Gods love within him. God hates perversion, in every form. Bondage is literally nothing at all but a perverted form of sex. The act of fulfilling the physical need is more than enough.

 

[Human]

Not really, it tells you that if you may marry to fulfill your physical needs, which we both know what that means. Desires are not needs. We grow up in schools being taught the difference between wants and needs, but we never really learn it, do we? : p

But no, he who loves the ways of the earth does not have Gods love within him. God hates perversion, in every form. Bondage is literally nothing at all but a perverted form of sex. The act of fulfilling the physical need is more than enough.

There's a difference between fulfilling a desire that exists between independent partners, and marrying someone just because you want to have sex with them. I never said I agreed with what the bible says, but it DOES say that those who can't contain their lust should marry.

 

[JFSurvivor]

That's such a repressed thing to say. Your partner is more likely to leave you (whether that's taking the car and kids, or withdrawing emotionally and physically) if you're sexually dull than if you make an effort to fulfill her desires.

Sex isn't a performance though. When it comes to sex (from what I have heard) you just do what comes naturally and it'll be great. PLEASE CAN WE NOT GO ON A RANT ABOUT WHAT GOOD SEX IS IN DETAIL!! I JUST WANTED TO MAKE A POINT BASED ON WHAT I HAVE HEARD. I AM NOT CLAIMING TO BE AN EXPERT!

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

If you think the need to sex is just about your genitals, then you've clearly never had sex. People don't always father or mother children, sex is also about fun, pleasure, experimentation, bonding, enjoyment, fulfillment, spontaneity, passion, desire. It's about lots of things other than furthering children.

As for desire, it is absolutely necessary ​in a partnership.

Actually I have had sex, and I regret the things Ive done.

And sure, sex can be fun. You can bond with your partner from it. Lets apply this to other things, though. Lets imagine 2 serial killers. The two killers feel the uncontrollable "need" to kidnap and kill someone. In the act, they find pleasure, fun, experiment, passion and even bond together as two murderers.

That logic could apply to just about anything : p But that doesnt make any of it good.

 

[Human]

Sex isn't a performance though. When it comes to sex (from what I have heard) you just do what comes naturally and it'll be great. PLEASE CAN WE NOT GO ON A RANT ABOUT WHAT GOOD SEX IS IN DETAIL!! I JUST WANTED TO MAKE A PINT BASED ON WHAT I HAVE HEARD. I AM NOT CLAIMING TO BE AN EXPERT!

Yea. It's awkward, it's never hollywood, it's uncomfortable at times, it's trial and error for a long time, but when you get closer and closer to a partner, at least in my eyes and my experience, you should feel more comfortable, able to be more honest and open and willing to try to satisfy your partner's needs.

It doesn't have to be perfect every time, heck it doesn't even have to be perfect, but by making a mutual effort to fulfill one another, it makes people stronger, happier, and healthier.

 

[Human]

Actually I have had sex, and I regret the things Ive done.

And sure, sex can be fun. You can bond with your partner from it. Lets apply this to other things, though. Lets imagine 2 serial killers. The two killers feel the uncontrollable "need" to kidnap and kill someone. In the act, they find pleasure, fun, experiment, passion and even bond together as two murderers.

That logic could apply to just about anything : p But that doesnt make any of it good.

This is ridiculous. Serial killing is murder, it's illegal, and it's a lot darker than natural, healthy sexual desire between two consenting adults. Please come back with a valid analogy.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

There's a difference between fulfilling a desire that exists between independent partners, and marrying someone just because you want to have sex with them. I never said I agreed with what the bible says, but it DOES say that those who can't contain their lust should marry.

I really hate this argument, it literally comes out of nowhere at all whatsoever. Why do you think God tells you that you have to marry to have sex? What does the bible tell you what two married people have to do? Love each other. Serve each other. Provide for and take care of each other. This argument holds no water.


And no it doesnt say that. It says those who cant control their needs. As for lust, it calls lust a sin many times. You are literally changing the word need with the word lust to provide for your argument.

 

[Sirk]

That's such a repressed thing to say. Your partner is more likely to leave you (whether that's taking the car and kids, or withdrawing emotionally and physically) if you're sexually dull than if you make an effort to fulfill her desires.

Thia is where you are really wrong. Good sex is the icing on the cake of an emotionally sound relationship. Not the other way around.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

This is ridiculous. Serial killing is murder, it's illegal, and it's a lot darker than natural, healthy sexual desire between two consenting adults. Please come back with a valid analogy.

Haha, it is entirely logical. You can make that argument for anything whatsoever. Those things in no way whatsoever make something righteous.

 

[Human]

I really hate this argument, it literally comes out of nowhere at all whatsoever. Why do you think God tells you that you have to marry to have sex? What does the bible tell you what two married people have to do? Love each other. Serve each other. Provide for and take care of each other. This argument holds no water.


And no it doesnt say that. It says those who cant control their needs. As for lust, it calls lust a sin many times. You are literally changing the word need with the word lust to provide for your argument.

From Corinthians:

Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do.
But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

 

[Human]

Haha, it is entirely logical. You can make that argument for anything whatsoever. Those things in no way whatsoever make something righteous.

No, it's not. It's actually a well documented logical fallacy called ''faulty analogy'' or ''inadequate analogy''. An analogy is validated by the degree to which it adheres to the following premises:

The relevance (positive or negative) of the known similarities to the similarity inferred in the conclusion.
The degree of relevant similarity (or dissimilarity) between the two objects.
The amount and variety of instances that form the basis of the analogy.


Yours is a weak analogy.

 

[JFSurvivor]

Coming from someone who's tried it in order to know, I take it?

Look, if my partner says to me ''tie me up, it makes me crazy'', and comes out fulfilled, then her needs are fulfilled. That's pretty basic sexual dynamic right there.

um...no. I have never had sex before. I have been sexually abused but never have had sex. I'm not claiming to be an expert but here's what I do know. Sex isn't just about "being fulfilled" or even about having a need met. It's about loving your partner in a safe way. Sex is supposed to be safe and filled with love. When it comes to bondage all you feel is lust mixed with adrenaline and fear. How do I know this? Well that's really none of your business. Sex between a husband and wife can promote love and understanding and bondage produces, lust. Sex does produce lust but lust is only a part of it. It's not what sex is about. Look, I have skeletons in my closet and I am not an expert on this stuff but I think I know enough about this stuff to at least have an opinion. And again, I HAVE NEVER TRIED BONDAGE!!

 

[Human]

Thia is where you are really wrong. Good sex is the icing on the cake of an emotionally sound relationship. Not the other way around.

Sex might be, in a relationship, something that should be shared between two emotionally connected people, but it's also a necessity for that emotional connection to remain healthy, not littered with resentment, and not tinged with unhappiness or unfulfillment.

 

[Human]

um...no. I have never had sex before. I have been sexually abused but never have had sex. I'm not claiming to be an expert but here's what I do know. Sex isn't just about "being fulfilled" or even about having a need met. It's about loving your partner in a safe way. Sex is supposed to be safe and filled with love. When it comes to bondage all you feel is lust mixed with adrenaline and fear. How do I know this? Well that's really none of your business. Sex between a husband and wife can promote love and understanding and bondage produces, lust. Sex does produce lust but lust is only a part of it. It's not what sex is about. Look, I have skeletons in my closet and I am not an expert on this stuff but I think I know enough about this stuff to at least have an opinion. And again, I HAVE NEVER TRIED BONDAGE!!

Bondage, by consent, in a comortable, open and honest relationship has a far different dynamic than bondage by force. There's a world of difference there. The key ingredient is to feel comfortable with your partner to begin with.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

From Corinthians:

Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do.
But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

And where is the word lust? I do not see it. But there is clearly the need for sex. I can tell you from experience that I have had the need come up out of nowhere whatsoever, but that need does not include lusting after anything.

On the other hand, I can give you countless verses on lust being a sin. The bible does tell you that it is okay to be attracted to your wife, but attraction to any other person is a sin. And again, and even by the same writer that you just qouted, we are told to take care of the need, but to take time for prayer to avoid temptation, and to not let ourselves become passionate. Bondage is clearly unclean, and meant for nothing more at all than fulfillment of personal desire, the source of all sin.

I kinda feel like this conversation would be the same as defending over eating by saying "God tells us we can eat when we are hungry".

 

[JFSurvivor]

Bondage, by consent, in a comortable, open and honest relationship has a far different dynamic than bondage by force. There's a world of difference there. The key ingredient is to feel comfortable with your partner to begin with.

think of it like this. Why does a person ask to be tied up? Because they want to feel that fear and adrenaline. It has nothing to do with getting closer to the other person.

 

[Human]

And where is the word lust? I do not see it. But there is clearly the need for sex. I can tell you from experience that I have had the need come up out of nowhere whatsoever, but that need does not include lusting after anything.

On the other hand, I can give you countless verses on lust being a sin. The bible does tell you that it is okay to be attracted to your wife, but attraction to any other person is a sin. And again, and even by the same writer that you just qouted, we are told to take care of the need, but to take time for prayer to avoid temptation, and to not let ourselves become passionate. Bondage is clearly unclean, and meant for nothing more at all than fulfillment of personal desire, the source of all sin.

I kinda feel like this conversation would be the same as defending over eating by saying "God tells us we can eat when we are hungry".

The word ''passion'' means the same as ''lust'' in this context. Here's some other translations::

But if they can't control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It's better to marry than to burn with lust.
But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
But if they do not have self-control, let them get married. For it is better to marry than to burn with sexual desire.
But if they do not have self-control, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with desire.
But if they do not endure, let them marry. It is beneficial for them to take a wife rather than to burn with lust.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

No, it's not. It's actually a well documented logical fallacy called ''faulty analogy'' or ''inadequate analogy''. An analogy is validated by the degree to which it adheres to the following premises:

The relevance (positive or negative) of the known similarities to the similarity inferred in the conclusion.
The degree of relevant similarity (or dissimilarity) between the two objects.
The amount and variety of instances that form the basis of the analogy.


Yours is a weak analogy.

The point being that just because you can bond over it, it doesnt automatically make it good? Whats the difference between legal and illegal? They have the same affect. I can therefore argue that because bondage has those experiences, murdering can be good because it shares them as well.

Is it perverted? Yeah. And so is bondage. And consensual doesnt make it good either.