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Personally, I don't think people are all that different online than they are in person. You can find a cheating guy in church... I would know, I dated one. See, people are people, human nature is what it is. You will find all kinds of icky people in church, people who abuse the grace of God or aren't saved at all.
Now, the internet does allow for some advantages, I'll give you that. You can hide kids, baby mamas, drug problems, spouses... all of those things are true. However, you can hide that in person as well. It all depends on what you're willing to see and what you're willing to admit to yourself.
The last guy I was with was for 3 years, and he was a good liar. Very good. He cheated on me, knew scripture, and we went to church together. He was going to be a pastor! Thankfully we broke up, but everyone at church was convinced he was a great guy. It took me awhile to wise up because I believed the line, "Oh baby, I'm sorry, I'll change." Truly, you can be deceived in person or online.
Now, the internet does allow for some advantages, I'll give you that. You can hide kids, baby mamas, drug problems, spouses... all of those things are true. However, you can hide that in person as well. It all depends on what you're willing to see and what you're willing to admit to yourself.
The last guy I was with was for 3 years, and he was a good liar. Very good. He cheated on me, knew scripture, and we went to church together. He was going to be a pastor! Thankfully we broke up, but everyone at church was convinced he was a great guy. It took me awhile to wise up because I believed the line, "Oh baby, I'm sorry, I'll change." Truly, you can be deceived in person or online.
M
My brothers and sisters: I will be hitting the 6-0 in a few months and I am still hoping the Lord will provide a loving husband for me. But I'll tell you this; I would still prefer to remain unwed than to be in a marriage just to "be married". Marriage is difficult enough without staring off with such low expectations. Regardless of what plans The Father may have for me specifically, you have plenty of time to find the right person. Be encouraged.
You who have been on a lot of job interviews have been told that not only is the prospective employer interviewing you but you should be interviewing them as well. Don't worry so much about how you're coming across to others unless you have an issue w/being disingenuous or needy. Be real. If someone doesn't find that attractive, wipe the dust from your sandals and march on. God wants us to be real with Him and with others. If that guy or gal can't be real with you and permit you to be real with them then why would you want to marry them?
I want to tell you young men that you are handsome. You are brave. You have good ideas worth sharing. You are valuable and cherished by God. You are a prince in the kingdom of heaven. One day you will have the responsibility of providing for your wife and children. You will need to be the leader of the family. Take the time now to prepare for those responsibilities. And danschance: you hit it on the head. Women need to feel cherished. Brothers, it's not easy for many of you to show vulnerabilities and tenderness. Just like the old joke goes: How do you get to Carnegy Hall? Practice, practice, practice. Brothers, ask the Lord if He's desiring change in your life which would help develop your character.
And to my sisters in Christ: How beautiful you are! How lovely and sweet you are. Your tenderness and softly spoken words can sooth the hurting heart. You are a princess in the kingdom of heaven, complete with ballgown. You and I need to learn how men think and being to understand them. Just as men can be non-emotional, we need to develop a little bit of a thick skin when he prefers to do something with the guys. He's not rejecting time with you, he's just filling his emotional tank spending time with other men. This would be a good time for the women to seek the Lord in the ways we can learn how to meet the needs of the opposite sex. What might the Father reveal which would enhance your spiritual beauty before men?
I bless you young men and women who long for the loving relationship in marriage. Please be patient. Do not be discouraged.
You who have been on a lot of job interviews have been told that not only is the prospective employer interviewing you but you should be interviewing them as well. Don't worry so much about how you're coming across to others unless you have an issue w/being disingenuous or needy. Be real. If someone doesn't find that attractive, wipe the dust from your sandals and march on. God wants us to be real with Him and with others. If that guy or gal can't be real with you and permit you to be real with them then why would you want to marry them?
I want to tell you young men that you are handsome. You are brave. You have good ideas worth sharing. You are valuable and cherished by God. You are a prince in the kingdom of heaven. One day you will have the responsibility of providing for your wife and children. You will need to be the leader of the family. Take the time now to prepare for those responsibilities. And danschance: you hit it on the head. Women need to feel cherished. Brothers, it's not easy for many of you to show vulnerabilities and tenderness. Just like the old joke goes: How do you get to Carnegy Hall? Practice, practice, practice. Brothers, ask the Lord if He's desiring change in your life which would help develop your character.
And to my sisters in Christ: How beautiful you are! How lovely and sweet you are. Your tenderness and softly spoken words can sooth the hurting heart. You are a princess in the kingdom of heaven, complete with ballgown. You and I need to learn how men think and being to understand them. Just as men can be non-emotional, we need to develop a little bit of a thick skin when he prefers to do something with the guys. He's not rejecting time with you, he's just filling his emotional tank spending time with other men. This would be a good time for the women to seek the Lord in the ways we can learn how to meet the needs of the opposite sex. What might the Father reveal which would enhance your spiritual beauty before men?
I bless you young men and women who long for the loving relationship in marriage. Please be patient. Do not be discouraged.
D
Sorry to hear that Amy
I've been deceived many times myself and got involved with people by all rights I should have known better than to get involved with. I have to admit to myself that every time I was ever deceived on anything really important, I think deep down a part of me knew better but I just didn't want to believe it. A lot of skilled liars will use that tendency against you if you have it. I finally fixed that about myself in the past year or so and managed to take the blinders off....thank God.
I've dated a lot of really tricky women too, and it takes a long time of face to face interaction and quite a few dates sometimes before a red flag presents itself. With that type of person, the really subtle type....I think it would be impossible to figure that out about a person over the internet.
I think todays men have relationship problems because they are no different than a girl. Lots of men ive met are mama's boys, they are not strong in the Lord or anything else. Maybe our society has made men feminine? Its hard to find a guy who really acts like a MAN, they sit around and whine and cry like u are doing here.
I believe they are out there on both sides. Granted, there are more Secular or Other-Religion people in the world than Christians. Nonetheless, I have seen many meet from different parts of the globe or the same small town. I suppose it just depends on timing, trust, and circumstance. For instance, I've had about a dozen relationships in life, but only 2 or 3 were Christian women. The phrase 'good' Christian, or 'On-Fire', speaks about an even smaller percentage, such as the difference between Christians and Non-Christians, so I suppose that may be a part of it.
Are our standards to high? Are our definitions unrealistic? Is there a laundry list needing filled first?
I don't know... All I know is that while I don't believe in soul-mates, I do believe in the Hebreic custom of the Groom's Father picking the bride. (An analogy Christ and Paul both alluded to, and one which from a spiritual sense of God the Father choosing, I'm more than willing to wait.) That's tough, however, because it means the decision is less in our hands and more in another's.
Now, not to say you sit by passively and hide, but as far as dating or marriage, you ask your father whether or not each one is his choice. Once one of them 'passes the test' (as it were), then you'll get the 'okay'. That's part of how I see it anyway...
Are our standards to high? Are our definitions unrealistic? Is there a laundry list needing filled first?
I don't know... All I know is that while I don't believe in soul-mates, I do believe in the Hebreic custom of the Groom's Father picking the bride. (An analogy Christ and Paul both alluded to, and one which from a spiritual sense of God the Father choosing, I'm more than willing to wait.) That's tough, however, because it means the decision is less in our hands and more in another's.
Now, not to say you sit by passively and hide, but as far as dating or marriage, you ask your father whether or not each one is his choice. Once one of them 'passes the test' (as it were), then you'll get the 'okay'. That's part of how I see it anyway...
My thoughts:
1) Anymore, you have to define what you mean by "Christian". It's a label that's used so loosely and has been so watered down that you have to observe someone before you know if they mean "I love God with all that I am, my life is because of Christ and for Christ" or "I go to church every once in a while and said that prayer that one time. Other than that, I do what I want when I want and Jesus really doesn't mean much to me besides a label."
2) The men aren't really pursuing. Granted, some women are okay with being the pursuer, but I, personally, am not. I've seen too many guys not even try to pursue any girl, then complain that they get put in the "friend zone".
3) Like Donkeyfish said, some people are looking for someone who believes exactly everything that they do to a T. I'm talking within Christianity, as obviously Christianity and other beliefs (Hinduism, etc.) do not line up and would not be compatible. It's okay to have small differences in belief as long as it's not completely changing doctrines/foundations of the Word.
1) Anymore, you have to define what you mean by "Christian". It's a label that's used so loosely and has been so watered down that you have to observe someone before you know if they mean "I love God with all that I am, my life is because of Christ and for Christ" or "I go to church every once in a while and said that prayer that one time. Other than that, I do what I want when I want and Jesus really doesn't mean much to me besides a label."
2) The men aren't really pursuing. Granted, some women are okay with being the pursuer, but I, personally, am not. I've seen too many guys not even try to pursue any girl, then complain that they get put in the "friend zone".
3) Like Donkeyfish said, some people are looking for someone who believes exactly everything that they do to a T. I'm talking within Christianity, as obviously Christianity and other beliefs (Hinduism, etc.) do not line up and would not be compatible. It's okay to have small differences in belief as long as it's not completely changing doctrines/foundations of the Word.
I think not just here but in this world, everywhere tragedy is there
John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
So here is where I am developing my dependency on. Leaving and forsaking this world, seeing I am not of this world only in it
John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
So here is where I am developing my dependency on. Leaving and forsaking this world, seeing I am not of this world only in it
H
Usually, men who come across as charming and with their charm they're good at pursuing, charming a girl's heart are precisely the men who are better experienced at breaking that girl's heart. ...and the next girl, and the next.. ...and all the girls before them. LOL
This entire thread reminds me of precious words in red: the wisdom of our Lord Jesus when He said, "This is the judgment, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil. For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come to the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But he who practices the truth comes to the Light, so that his deed may be manifested as having been wrought in God" (John 3:19-21).
If a charming man is later discovered to have misrepresented himself (Mr.Charm is really Mr.Fake), then that sinner should also come to the Light that his deeds may be exposed, perhaps fixed in repentance, and be reconciled with God.
As believers anchored upon the most precious faith, who are beloved by God and who are "God's own precious possession," we are to "practice the truth" everywhere and anywhere we go (ie. online or local) because we saints are the friends of God. ...just saying.
This entire thread reminds me of precious words in red: the wisdom of our Lord Jesus when He said, "This is the judgment, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil. For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come to the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But he who practices the truth comes to the Light, so that his deed may be manifested as having been wrought in God" (John 3:19-21).
If a charming man is later discovered to have misrepresented himself (Mr.Charm is really Mr.Fake), then that sinner should also come to the Light that his deeds may be exposed, perhaps fixed in repentance, and be reconciled with God.
As believers anchored upon the most precious faith, who are beloved by God and who are "God's own precious possession," we are to "practice the truth" everywhere and anywhere we go (ie. online or local) because we saints are the friends of God. ...just saying.
