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A
You are making assumptions based on your own experiences.
The question was how do we help those hurting and in pain who have been abused that we encounter?
Your answer is to shut down conversation and ignore that they are in pain because we aren't qualified to deal with it?
In truth the only person who can heal them is God.
Yet even untrained we can pray with someone and help them off the ledge. Sometimes there isn't anyone else around to tell them that God loves them and there is another way.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QdgCajndgNw
The question was how do we help those hurting and in pain who have been abused that we encounter?
Your answer is to shut down conversation and ignore that they are in pain because we aren't qualified to deal with it?
In truth the only person who can heal them is God.
Yet even untrained we can pray with someone and help them off the ledge. Sometimes there isn't anyone else around to tell them that God loves them and there is another way.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QdgCajndgNw
D
Talk about the abuse then, instead of turning it into a study on how to fix it. Because honestly? So many aren't catching the difference between being a bit abusive at times and real abuse. Somebody calling me "a legalist," or telling me I have some kind of spirit in me, or the crowning jewel, "you're a Calvinist," is NOT abuse. It's imbecilic human nature we all fall into.
When you're a toddler, and your parents bring you out for a sex party so you can titillate their friends with your tongue is abuse.
When your older cousins are babysitting you and use you as a sex toy is abuse.
When a biker gang kidnaps you on the railroad tracks, take you back to a motel they are all in, keep you a prisoner in a room for three months coming in to rape you whenever they want, and then dump you back on those same tracks is abuse.
When your mother asks you to balance the checkbook before going to bed with her, that's abuse.
That's the stuff that launches triggers.
What's being talked about here is false teachers, what position to pray in, forgiveness before you even get what needs to be forgiven, the usual stuff about "mature Christians" v. "babes in Christ," where, to a person, everyone assumes they're the mature and all others are the babes, good fruit/bad fruit, X Easy Steps to Change, and the use of the word "trigger" to mean something entirely different than real triggers.
What's not being talked about here is real abuse!
When you're a toddler, and your parents bring you out for a sex party so you can titillate their friends with your tongue is abuse.
When your older cousins are babysitting you and use you as a sex toy is abuse.
When a biker gang kidnaps you on the railroad tracks, take you back to a motel they are all in, keep you a prisoner in a room for three months coming in to rape you whenever they want, and then dump you back on those same tracks is abuse.
When your mother asks you to balance the checkbook before going to bed with her, that's abuse.
That's the stuff that launches triggers.
What's being talked about here is false teachers, what position to pray in, forgiveness before you even get what needs to be forgiven, the usual stuff about "mature Christians" v. "babes in Christ," where, to a person, everyone assumes they're the mature and all others are the babes, good fruit/bad fruit, X Easy Steps to Change, and the use of the word "trigger" to mean something entirely different than real triggers.
What's not being talked about here is real abuse!
Lynn,
She probably doesn't even comprehend things like that that are at the heart of many standard and typical clinical sessions. So give her a break for using the terminology she did. We should all know she is simply speaking of Spiritually putting stumbling blocks in the developmental paths of kids in a church setting, but trying to say it in a way that will catch attention.
She probably doesn't even comprehend things like that that are at the heart of many standard and typical clinical sessions. So give her a break for using the terminology she did. We should all know she is simply speaking of Spiritually putting stumbling blocks in the developmental paths of kids in a church setting, but trying to say it in a way that will catch attention.
D
Which would work, except for those who truly know what abuse it. All they will see is what they went through is being compared to kneeling for prayer. It so downgrades what they've gone through. It would feel like losing a leg in an accident and someone hands you a band aid. Bad enough the throbbing from the leg, and seeing it lying in the road over there. But then add to that, someone hands a band aid?
I would go for the difference between real abuse and everyday abusiveness, but this keeps going into the same ole same ole it always does on this forum. "It's them, not me."
I would go for the difference between real abuse and everyday abusiveness, but this keeps going into the same ole same ole it always does on this forum. "It's them, not me."
A
I didn't make up the term "spiritual abuse" and though it is not overtly damaging as sexual abuse or physical abuse it is still damaging to people and keeps them from being who God created them to be.
Warning Signs of Spiritual Abuse, Part One | CBN.com
https://holysoup.com/dangers-of-spiritual-abuse/
The article suggests this
If we stop posting for fear someone will come along and misunderstand the purpose of a post, then this whole forum would be silent.
A lot of people have unspoken wounds that they don't talk about, so it would be better if people stop assuming they know what people have and haven't experienced or understand the motives of others.
If someone shares something small that hurts them and you belittle it as nothing because your pain is bigger and hurts more, then you may never find out the deeper problems and abuse others have suffered.
Most conversations only skim the surface until trust and love is established.
Perhaps more counseling and healing might be needed if even the word abuse causes you to tell at everyone to shut up and not talk about it.
Warning Signs of Spiritual Abuse, Part One | CBN.com
https://holysoup.com/dangers-of-spiritual-abuse/
The article suggests this
If we stop posting for fear someone will come along and misunderstand the purpose of a post, then this whole forum would be silent.
A lot of people have unspoken wounds that they don't talk about, so it would be better if people stop assuming they know what people have and haven't experienced or understand the motives of others.
If someone shares something small that hurts them and you belittle it as nothing because your pain is bigger and hurts more, then you may never find out the deeper problems and abuse others have suffered.
Most conversations only skim the surface until trust and love is established.
Perhaps more counseling and healing might be needed if even the word abuse causes you to tell at everyone to shut up and not talk about it.
Because Lynn, I never expected to attack and onslaught this group brought and exposed
with just a few words said in the "wrong" way. It was obvious there is deep hurt here
and massive histories.
I said one sentence to a member asking about their partner, and it became a massive insult
and wound, followed by pages of vitriol. That is a trigger, big time.
Another fellow said basically if I did not agree he was walking with ex-nihilo creative authority
I was the enemy and would be servely rebuked by God into a trembling heap.
Another because I was not into security of faith, I must not be saved, all my spiritual experiences
are null and void, I should be pulverised and destroyed, because they love me so much.
These are emotional triggers, with anger, projection, and animosity which has nothing to do with
what I was sharing. I do not hold it against them, I just still stand and wonder how badly they
have been dealt with in the past and how deep the feelings run.
with just a few words said in the "wrong" way. It was obvious there is deep hurt here
and massive histories.
I said one sentence to a member asking about their partner, and it became a massive insult
and wound, followed by pages of vitriol. That is a trigger, big time.
Another fellow said basically if I did not agree he was walking with ex-nihilo creative authority
I was the enemy and would be servely rebuked by God into a trembling heap.
Another because I was not into security of faith, I must not be saved, all my spiritual experiences
are null and void, I should be pulverised and destroyed, because they love me so much.
These are emotional triggers, with anger, projection, and animosity which has nothing to do with
what I was sharing. I do not hold it against them, I just still stand and wonder how badly they
have been dealt with in the past and how deep the feelings run.
PS. 6:2.
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
30:2.
O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.
41:4.
I said, LORD, be merciful unto me: heal my soul; for I have sinned against thee.
107:20.
He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.
MAL. 4:2.
But unto you that fear My Name shall the Son of righteousness arise with healing in His wings;
and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall.
JAMES 5:16.
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
111JOHN 1:2.
Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.
Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed.
30:2.
O LORD my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.
41:4.
I said, LORD, be merciful unto me: heal my soul; for I have sinned against thee.
107:20.
He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.
MAL. 4:2.
But unto you that fear My Name shall the Son of righteousness arise with healing in His wings;
and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall.
JAMES 5:16.
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
111JOHN 1:2.
Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.
D
Psychologists and psychiatrists.
As for the minor hurts everyone gives to each other, this one worked for years,
"Stick and stones may break my bones,
but names will never hurt me."
This victim mentality is the very thing that bothers me. I was not any of those people I just described. And yet, it is assumed there is some deep reason that's all about me immediately.
There is a person on this site whose on the verge of losing home and grandkids.
A man who is struggling to take care of his elderly wife. He's 80.
A woman so mixed up she doesn't even know how to deal with any of it.
Two people trying to figure out how to take care of a loved one and have enough to live on.
Another woman who is stuck in an abusive relationship, but doesn't have the means to get out.
Another guy is stuck at home, literally shielded away from society all his life, but cannot get out, because his family takes care of all his needs, without giving him enough money to hail a cab, once more move out on his own.
These are all things happening to people on this site right now. Real people.
And yet, BDF is talking about BYDU! (Baby/Bae, You Don't Understand.) Over what? You're a legalist? You use the word Yeshua? G-d? Demons? Hearing God? Maturity levels?
This feels like a corporate retreat for a charity held in Jamaica and the only way to get to the meetings is to push through the blasted beggars. And the meeting is about how we feel. Our victimhood.
The same things are being repeated by the same people over the same injuries. Some of them aren't even injuries. It's this!
[video=youtube;hEN_Ya687oc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEN_Ya687oc[/video]
How about we just man up, and get to the point of helping others truly in need, or even just in want, instead of constantly licking perceived wounds?
As for the minor hurts everyone gives to each other, this one worked for years,
"Stick and stones may break my bones,
but names will never hurt me."
This victim mentality is the very thing that bothers me. I was not any of those people I just described. And yet, it is assumed there is some deep reason that's all about me immediately.
There is a person on this site whose on the verge of losing home and grandkids.
A man who is struggling to take care of his elderly wife. He's 80.
A woman so mixed up she doesn't even know how to deal with any of it.
Two people trying to figure out how to take care of a loved one and have enough to live on.
Another woman who is stuck in an abusive relationship, but doesn't have the means to get out.
Another guy is stuck at home, literally shielded away from society all his life, but cannot get out, because his family takes care of all his needs, without giving him enough money to hail a cab, once more move out on his own.
These are all things happening to people on this site right now. Real people.
And yet, BDF is talking about BYDU! (Baby/Bae, You Don't Understand.) Over what? You're a legalist? You use the word Yeshua? G-d? Demons? Hearing God? Maturity levels?
This feels like a corporate retreat for a charity held in Jamaica and the only way to get to the meetings is to push through the blasted beggars. And the meeting is about how we feel. Our victimhood.
The same things are being repeated by the same people over the same injuries. Some of them aren't even injuries. It's this!
[video=youtube;hEN_Ya687oc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEN_Ya687oc[/video]
How about we just man up, and get to the point of helping others truly in need, or even just in want, instead of constantly licking perceived wounds?
along in our journey, we sometimes are required to do things that we would never
dream that would be required of us, such as 'opening our HOMES' to the less fortunate,
and sometimes 'giving' ALL that we have 'put-away' - after a while, it becomes 'old-hat',
and a lot of the time we simply praise our Maker for the ways that He teaches us to be
more like Him, no matter the COST!
dream that would be required of us, such as 'opening our HOMES' to the less fortunate,
and sometimes 'giving' ALL that we have 'put-away' - after a while, it becomes 'old-hat',
and a lot of the time we simply praise our Maker for the ways that He teaches us to be
more like Him, no matter the COST!
The post from lynn is a typical warning.
Do not touch what is within, it could destroy you.
Jesus would say without letting His love into your heart to heal and
resolve issues, you could miss salvation and redemption completely.
Others get hurt without hope of resolution, where in Christ he provides
us with the means for finding real solutions in the cross and His love
expressed through the Holy Spirit.
Do not touch what is within, it could destroy you.
Jesus would say without letting His love into your heart to heal and
resolve issues, you could miss salvation and redemption completely.
Others get hurt without hope of resolution, where in Christ he provides
us with the means for finding real solutions in the cross and His love
expressed through the Holy Spirit.
A
Sorry, I am still stuck on the image of the girl running out of a counseling section that caused the counselor to quit her job and warn off anyone who wants to help others from fear they will face the same situation.
Should we try brain surgery on these forums?
No, but we can hold their hand, pray with them and encourage them to see a brain surgeon.
People who are spiritually abused have scars and hurts they never admit. It just gets buried and pushed aside.
I don't encourage people to dig or pull off scabs. Just to recognize when someone is in pain and not poke at the bandaid or do things that add to the pain.
No one is forcing anyone to come in this thread and yes there are a lot of hurting people with big issues going on in their lives.
Besides prayer and listening to them, what do you suggest we do?
Should we try brain surgery on these forums?
No, but we can hold their hand, pray with them and encourage them to see a brain surgeon.
People who are spiritually abused have scars and hurts they never admit. It just gets buried and pushed aside.
I don't encourage people to dig or pull off scabs. Just to recognize when someone is in pain and not poke at the bandaid or do things that add to the pain.
No one is forcing anyone to come in this thread and yes there are a lot of hurting people with big issues going on in their lives.
Besides prayer and listening to them, what do you suggest we do?
P
We are not the answer.....the one who sent us is
[FONT="]Isaiah 9:6 [/FONT]
[FONT="]For unto us a Child is born, Unto us a Son is given; And the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.[/FONT]
This is an older book, but I think it is among the best for approaching this subject in the church.
https://www.amazon.com/Connecting-Healing-Ourselves-Our-Relationships/dp/0849945291
https://www.amazon.com/Connecting-Healing-Ourselves-Our-Relationships/dp/0849945291
