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I waited for sex until I was married. I horribly regretted that decision. I found out afterward that she in fact did not wait. And she even went back to her ex after we got together. Which I still don't understand, I think I am a pretty good guy...and he was bum that lived with his mom, and hit her...on a fairly regular basis.
J
My first wife was a virgin--or so I thought just because she bled a little on the wedding night, but the truth is that I was really naive and inexperienced, never saw hery hymen....the blood could have come from the tail-end of her period (pun intended)....anyway, she was unfaithful during the honeymoon period, and left in a hurry when she got a venereal disease...I don't know what else to say, except you never know.
J
The issue is sin...it is a sin to engage in sex if you are not married. It is that simple if you are a Christian.
Does premarital sex ruin the relationship? Well, I presume in some cases it does. I lived with my second wife for 7 years before we were married--after my experience with my so-called virgin bride, I was gun shy and did not want to make the same mistake...we were married for 26 years; we did grow apart and were divorced, but are still good friends--we do not have a sexual relationship anymore, it is a good, clean friendship based on our love for each other in a Christian way.
Does premarital sex ruin the relationship? Well, I presume in some cases it does. I lived with my second wife for 7 years before we were married--after my experience with my so-called virgin bride, I was gun shy and did not want to make the same mistake...we were married for 26 years; we did grow apart and were divorced, but are still good friends--we do not have a sexual relationship anymore, it is a good, clean friendship based on our love for each other in a Christian way.
I personally think marriage is a scam. At least today it is. Marriage before God at a church is one thing. But once you get the state involved it just becomes a contract that is harder to get out of.
Which brings me to another question, does the marriage count if it was only done by a local official and not by a church?
Which brings me to another question, does the marriage count if it was only done by a local official and not by a church?
I would encourage them to think for themselves and make their own decisions accordingly. I would try to give them direction, as I see fit, and if they make a mistake, they would suffer the consequences and maybe be a little wiser because of it too.
You can't carry every kid. You have to let them make their own mistakes. I honestly wouldnt care what they did. I'd just tell them be safe and don't catch anything and don't have kids until your stable enough too. Period.
You can't carry every kid. You have to let them make their own mistakes. I honestly wouldnt care what they did. I'd just tell them be safe and don't catch anything and don't have kids until your stable enough too. Period.
J
Here is my two cents.
Even if you don't know your Bible well and just read the verses that the people in this thread have pulled out, it's very clear that the Bible is against sex before marriage.
What I find sad is just how many people are fighting to cling to this sin. They try to excuse it by either perverting/twisting God's word to fit their view or with examples from their own lives that they feel somehow justify their sins. Either one is simply wrong to me. Why? Because if God says something is wrong then that's the end of it. After all, who are we to talk back to God and tell Him that He's wrong?
Is staying pure before marriage hard? Yes. Do people sometimes deceive one another about their sexual past before marriage? Yes. Do some people who have sex before marriage go on to live happy lives? Yes.
But none of that is an excuse for sin. Sin is still sin. And, while some may prosper in their sin in this life, I can assure you that when this life is over, they will not. Only then will they know that their sin was a horrible mistake. But, at that point, it will be too late.
Even if you're not 100% convinced that the Bible speaks against sex before marriage, think of it this way. At the very least, I think that we can all agree that this topic debatable. So, my question to all of those who think that sex before marriage is not a sin is this: Why in the world do you wanna roll the dice on something like this? Is it really worth it to take that kind of chance?
I would much rather be safe than sorry. What's the worst that can happen? For no matter what occurs, at the very least I can be 100% confident that I'm being faithful to God. I believe that's far more important than any earthly pleasures that I could receive, sin or not. For, I know that I'll be rewarded for my obedience. Will you?
Even if you don't know your Bible well and just read the verses that the people in this thread have pulled out, it's very clear that the Bible is against sex before marriage.
What I find sad is just how many people are fighting to cling to this sin. They try to excuse it by either perverting/twisting God's word to fit their view or with examples from their own lives that they feel somehow justify their sins. Either one is simply wrong to me. Why? Because if God says something is wrong then that's the end of it. After all, who are we to talk back to God and tell Him that He's wrong?
Is staying pure before marriage hard? Yes. Do people sometimes deceive one another about their sexual past before marriage? Yes. Do some people who have sex before marriage go on to live happy lives? Yes.
But none of that is an excuse for sin. Sin is still sin. And, while some may prosper in their sin in this life, I can assure you that when this life is over, they will not. Only then will they know that their sin was a horrible mistake. But, at that point, it will be too late.
Even if you're not 100% convinced that the Bible speaks against sex before marriage, think of it this way. At the very least, I think that we can all agree that this topic debatable. So, my question to all of those who think that sex before marriage is not a sin is this: Why in the world do you wanna roll the dice on something like this? Is it really worth it to take that kind of chance?
I would much rather be safe than sorry. What's the worst that can happen? For no matter what occurs, at the very least I can be 100% confident that I'm being faithful to God. I believe that's far more important than any earthly pleasures that I could receive, sin or not. For, I know that I'll be rewarded for my obedience. Will you?
J
^^ Stands and applauds this post^^
We all have our excuses for what we do and don’t do. The bottom line is that we know better.
Romans 6:21 What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death!
Proverbs 16:25 There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.
The death of love, of trust, of intimacy, of families...
We all have our excuses for what we do and don’t do. The bottom line is that we know better.
Romans 6:21 What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death!
Proverbs 16:25 There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.
The death of love, of trust, of intimacy, of families...
V
I guess you guys can say that 'reality' has finally hit me. As far as sex and relationships go, I'm gonna turn the big 3-0 in a couple years and I really have nothing to show for it. I only have one failed relationship under my belt and a few other attempts at relationships over the years have been just as unsuccessful. I'm not trying to sound cynical or desperate or whatever ya wanna call it, but could this part of a divine plan? For those of you who know me pretty well, you would think I'd be able to have relationships somewhat taken care of in the same way you guys know that slowly but surely I have other parts of my life in order (my OCD, caring for my grandmother all the time, etc). After so many years, I finally got saved and my spiritual life has never been better. In fact, each week that passes I come to know and understand this carpenter who lived 2,000 years ago more and more closely. And when I say that 'reality' has hit me, it means that tho I desire a relationship with a Christian gal as much as anyone else, maybe that's something that's not for me. I am prepared to submit to any and all parts of God's will, even if it means that things I truly truly want I cannot have, and perhaps this is one of them. For those of us who haven't been quite successful in relationships, maybe the Lord is trying to tell us something. Blessings in Christ and take care of yourselves during this Christmas season!
S
I don't know if I have commented on this thread yet or not, but I am not going through all 600+ posts to see If I did or not.
I had sex outside of marraige with one woman when I was 17, it wasn't my idea, yet through giving into the tempation I consented. It really complicated things, and I also had developed an addiction to sex. She ended up being unfaithful to me (that hurt sooo bad at the time). Really neither of us were even ready for a serious relationship anyway; but because of that addiction that I had developed, the relationship, (if you can even call it that) dragged on much longer than it should have. Finally, I had ended it but was left emotionally scarred for some time after this, and my addiction to sex quickly morphed into an addiction to pornography.
God has since healed the wounds and delivered me from the bondage of my addiction. Having premarital sex led me into a downward spiral, that only by the faithfulness and grace of God was I lifted out of it. It is possible that it may not affect others the way it did myself, but why would anybody want to risk reaping the same outcome? Besides....God said not to do it, that should be enough on it's own. Take my word for it, sex outside of marriage is not what it is hyped up to be by the people of this world; just wait!!!...for your sake, your partner's sake, and above all: for the love of God. Peace be with you!
I had sex outside of marraige with one woman when I was 17, it wasn't my idea, yet through giving into the tempation I consented. It really complicated things, and I also had developed an addiction to sex. She ended up being unfaithful to me (that hurt sooo bad at the time). Really neither of us were even ready for a serious relationship anyway; but because of that addiction that I had developed, the relationship, (if you can even call it that) dragged on much longer than it should have. Finally, I had ended it but was left emotionally scarred for some time after this, and my addiction to sex quickly morphed into an addiction to pornography.
God has since healed the wounds and delivered me from the bondage of my addiction. Having premarital sex led me into a downward spiral, that only by the faithfulness and grace of God was I lifted out of it. It is possible that it may not affect others the way it did myself, but why would anybody want to risk reaping the same outcome? Besides....God said not to do it, that should be enough on it's own. Take my word for it, sex outside of marriage is not what it is hyped up to be by the people of this world; just wait!!!...for your sake, your partner's sake, and above all: for the love of God. Peace be with you!
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