Trapped
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i think there are many illusions, temptations here on earth that catch us up if not constantly aware. i think we need stay focused on God's will, always alert and committed to God's attempts to make us more like Him, pure love. submitting to Him every hour were here. i think that's why were here 80 or so years in training. mental stamina is a clue. i think the king david's, billy grams, charles stanley's, and mother theresa's got it right. to learn God's love and be great tenants in heaven. stop taking and start giving, everything else will fall into place. i pray God loves you and you let Him.
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*“Cry aloud, spare not;Lift up your voice like a trumpet;Tell My people their transgression,And the house of Jacob their sins.*Yet they seek Me daily,And delight to know My ways,As a nation that did righteousness,And did not forsake the ordinance of their God.They ask of Me the ordinances of justice;They take delight in approaching God.*‘Why have we fasted,’ they say, ‘and You have not seen?Why have we afflicted our souls, and You take no notice?’“In fact, in the day of your fast you find pleasure,And exploit all your laborers.*Indeed you fast for strife and debate,And to strike with the fist of wickedness.You will not fast as you do this day,To make your voice heard on high.*Is it a fast that I have chosen,A day for a man to afflict his soul?Is it to bow down his head like a bulrush,And to spread out sackcloth and ashes?Would you call this a fast,And an acceptable day to the Lord?*“
Is this not the fast that I have chosen:
To loose the bonds of wickedness
,To undo the heavy burdens,
To let the oppressed go free
,And that you break every yoke?*
Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,
And that you bring to your house the poor who are cast out;When you see the naked, that you cover him,And not hide yourself from your own flesh?*
Then your light shall break forth like the morning,Your healing shall spring forth speedily,And your righteousness shall go before you;The glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.*Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;You shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’“If you take away the yoke from your midst,The pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness, - Isaiah 58:1-9 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah58:1-9&version=NKJV
Is this not the fast that I have chosen:
To loose the bonds of wickedness
,To undo the heavy burdens,
To let the oppressed go free
,And that you break every yoke?*
Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,
And that you bring to your house the poor who are cast out;When you see the naked, that you cover him,And not hide yourself from your own flesh?*
Then your light shall break forth like the morning,Your healing shall spring forth speedily,And your righteousness shall go before you;The glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.*Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;You shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’“If you take away the yoke from your midst,The pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness, - Isaiah 58:1-9 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah58:1-9&version=NKJV
Wow I certinally didn't expect this many people to respond. I feel kind of embarrassed now lol. I have been reading the comments off and on all day today inbetween cooking, cleaning, teaching (homeschooling), and keeping the 13 month old out of everything. I know I have not been just real clear about a lot of details so I'll do that now. I was raised church of Christ but switched to Baptist when I was saved around 11 years old while at a Baptist church camp. I have never really developed my faith very much I don't think. I have questioned my salvation many times but I know there were times when I felt like I had a close relationship with God and I have enough bible knowledge to understand what all is involved in how salvation works. I also very regurally attend the same church I joined 9 years ago. Here's the problem though. I live a double life and always have since just after I got saved. I don't know how long after my conversion it was (weeks or months) but not long after I had a dream where Satan approached me with the offer to follow him but I had to turn my back on God if I did. Its been years now so it's kind of fuzzy but I remember not being able to resist so I accepted. When I woke up I was devastated. I couldn't believe what I had done and was too full of guilt to turn back to God. I know it was just a dream but at the young age of 12 it was enough to break me and let Satan in. My entire teen years were extremely hard and I would go years belonging to Satan to the point I would hate God. My dad was a very strict and cruel man and my mother would have had a heart attack if I ever told them so I just learned to hide it and worship Satan secretly and go to church when they made me. My salvation was also a secret cuz my dad would have beat me if I told him I had ever attended a Baptist church. Once I got married I attended the church of my choice for awhile but then went back to Satan for a few years. When I got pregnant I got scared for my baby so I joined a new church closer to home(still there) and prayed and prayed for God to free me. He did but it wasn't about a year and I was back to Satan. After awhile the more I went to church it seemed like the times I did slip up it was easier to get back out and I thought that after all these years I was finally done with this. The past few weeks have shown me otherwise. I got really mad at some family members and was on vacation in Nevada so I guess that opened the door for Satan.
I don't want to offend anyone but I don't believe in laying on of hands or other things like that. I do believe in fasting but have never done it. Its not ever talked about much at my church. Several people have suggested finding a different church but I'm not leaving my church. They are good people. They can't help me cuz I never let my need be known out of fear of them never treating me the same way again. I'm not shy but I do want to protect my family from prejudiced people. That's why I brought my problem to this group. No one knows me here and it's private. I I ow I've made this post really long and I'm sorry for that. I guess what I'm looking for here is prayer and a safe place to talk about this. My husband doesn't even know. He would prolly leave me if he knew.
I hope all this makes since.
I don't want to offend anyone but I don't believe in laying on of hands or other things like that. I do believe in fasting but have never done it. Its not ever talked about much at my church. Several people have suggested finding a different church but I'm not leaving my church. They are good people. They can't help me cuz I never let my need be known out of fear of them never treating me the same way again. I'm not shy but I do want to protect my family from prejudiced people. That's why I brought my problem to this group. No one knows me here and it's private. I I ow I've made this post really long and I'm sorry for that. I guess what I'm looking for here is prayer and a safe place to talk about this. My husband doesn't even know. He would prolly leave me if he knew.
I hope all this makes since.
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It makes alot of sense.
I recommend getting deeply grounded in Christ.
That dream did not mean you made a comitment to Satan.
I am pretty sure you really are an immature child of God not a minion of Satan.
To me what you lack is knowledge and discernment.
Please don't be insulted by me calling you immature or think I am elevating myself.
I don't consider myself an elder by any means.
I had a humbling encounter today when one of the boy scouts asked if I was my ten year old son's sister.
Sigh...apparently folks still mistaken me for a teenager physically.
Spiritually I say my age is about 6 years old.
But I can share what I have learnt.
You felt bad upon waking, that was the Holy Spirit convicting you.
Don't be afraid. God still loves you.
I am glad you have an awesome church!
You will probably find some prayer warriors there...maybe not the "laying of hands, praying the blood of Jesus kind", but a few "hold-your-hands and let you cry on the shoulder type"
I recommend getting deeply grounded in Christ.
That dream did not mean you made a comitment to Satan.
I am pretty sure you really are an immature child of God not a minion of Satan.
To me what you lack is knowledge and discernment.
Please don't be insulted by me calling you immature or think I am elevating myself.
I don't consider myself an elder by any means.
I had a humbling encounter today when one of the boy scouts asked if I was my ten year old son's sister.
Sigh...apparently folks still mistaken me for a teenager physically.
Spiritually I say my age is about 6 years old.
But I can share what I have learnt.
You felt bad upon waking, that was the Holy Spirit convicting you.
Don't be afraid. God still loves you.
I am glad you have an awesome church!
You will probably find some prayer warriors there...maybe not the "laying of hands, praying the blood of Jesus kind", but a few "hold-your-hands and let you cry on the shoulder type"
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Did you speak your faith in Jesus out loud?
That he died for YOUR sins on the cross and rose again on the 3rd day and will send the Holy Spirit to be your helper and guide.
It makes a difference to confess it with your lips and to be sealed with the Holy Spirit.
God is drawing you into a closer relationship with Him and we praise God for it.
That he died for YOUR sins on the cross and rose again on the 3rd day and will send the Holy Spirit to be your helper and guide.
It makes a difference to confess it with your lips and to be sealed with the Holy Spirit.
God is drawing you into a closer relationship with Him and we praise God for it.
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You'll find people here to talk to, that's for sure. The question I have is, who am I talking to now? You or one of your demons?
You came here presenting yourself as a human who has placed herself into a very serious situation, and asking for help. The Bible is very clear about what you must do to extricate yourself from it. But now you're almost laughing it off, saying "I don't believe in that" and "I'm not going to do this" and such. Basically the human in you asked for help, the demon in you is now rejecting that because it doesn't want you taking hold of the things that could actually force it to leave.
At this point it comes down to two verses - choose this day whom you will serve, and if you remain lukewarm Jesus will spew you from His mouth. It's your choice... YOUR choice, not your demon's. Stop giving them leeway over you.
You came here presenting yourself as a human who has placed herself into a very serious situation, and asking for help. The Bible is very clear about what you must do to extricate yourself from it. But now you're almost laughing it off, saying "I don't believe in that" and "I'm not going to do this" and such. Basically the human in you asked for help, the demon in you is now rejecting that because it doesn't want you taking hold of the things that could actually force it to leave.
At this point it comes down to two verses - choose this day whom you will serve, and if you remain lukewarm Jesus will spew you from His mouth. It's your choice... YOUR choice, not your demon's. Stop giving them leeway over you.
I'm not just real sure how I "placed myself" in this position when it came to me so many years ago.
I'm not sure where you get that I'm laughing it off. I'm just not getting all dark and serious about it cuz it's a part of my life. Has been for 27 years to be exact.
I'm not asking my own church members for help cuz like I said, small southern town. I would like to keep my house and property undamaged by prejudiced vandels. Not that my church members would do that but people are people and word would get out.
I'm not sure where you get that I'm laughing it off. I'm just not getting all dark and serious about it cuz it's a part of my life. Has been for 27 years to be exact.
I'm not asking my own church members for help cuz like I said, small southern town. I would like to keep my house and property undamaged by prejudiced vandels. Not that my church members would do that but people are people and word would get out.
You were tempted and you submitted to it. That's how anyone gets into any sin.
If you had a cancer for 27 years you wouldn't get all serious about it? You wouldn't want it out of your life? Hang onto it as a memento of the past? You either want to get rid of it or you don't. If you do then follow what the Bible tells you to do. If you don't, then (and forgive me if this sounds insensitive) stop wasting our time.
Revelation 3: 15I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.
I think that's where you are at right now. That's why the Holy Spirit has wooed the human in you to come here. But you woo the demon who makes you unresponsive. Christ wants to know, are you in it with Him or does He get rid of you like old tobacco?
I understand about prejudices and not wanting to rock the boat with those you are familiar with. But what's more important, keeping others happy or ridding yourself of a long-term cancer?
I love you sister, but I'm not about to play warm and fuzzy with your demons. They have to go, or you will go with them. And that's seriously serious to me.
If you had a cancer for 27 years you wouldn't get all serious about it? You wouldn't want it out of your life? Hang onto it as a memento of the past? You either want to get rid of it or you don't. If you do then follow what the Bible tells you to do. If you don't, then (and forgive me if this sounds insensitive) stop wasting our time.
Revelation 3: 15I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.
I think that's where you are at right now. That's why the Holy Spirit has wooed the human in you to come here. But you woo the demon who makes you unresponsive. Christ wants to know, are you in it with Him or does He get rid of you like old tobacco?
I understand about prejudices and not wanting to rock the boat with those you are familiar with. But what's more important, keeping others happy or ridding yourself of a long-term cancer?
I love you sister, but I'm not about to play warm and fuzzy with your demons. They have to go, or you will go with them. And that's seriously serious to me.
Wow! I mean just WOW!
I'm at a loss for words right now.
I am sorry. So so sorry for forcing you to read my prayer request, for forcing you to respond, and wasting you time.
How incredibly STUPID of me to think I could actually find genuine Christian people on an online site that I could open up to and get support from while I deal with this situation. Nevermind.
I'm at a loss for words right now.
I am sorry. So so sorry for forcing you to read my prayer request, for forcing you to respond, and wasting you time.
How incredibly STUPID of me to think I could actually find genuine Christian people on an online site that I could open up to and get support from while I deal with this situation. Nevermind.
