Personally no one is going to like my answer, but when it comes right down to it,
God commands us
all to be virgins, men and when both until marriage. So I see nothing wrong with
dothackzero's choice in wanting a virgin. I am saddened to think at his age that finding a virgin is so difficult.
I agree too, that things happen, we are all sinners and we each get tempted in many different ways. And no matter what we have done in life as long as we have repented, then we should be forgiven by our fellow brothers and sisters.
I will freely admit that I had issues standing by and listening to coworkers talk about their sex lives and not being married. Most dished out freely just to get their thrills and have fun which is the way of the world now days. Others were truly in a loving relationship with someone. But I could never understand how so many can give something so valuable (virginity) away just like that.
My first boy friend wanted to make love and I came right out and told him, I was staying a virgin until I was married, needless to say it wasn't long before he disappeared, which meant he really didn't love me or want me, he just wanted to get in the sack and that was it. God was looking out for me and protecting my heart. I stayed a virgin until I was 45 years old. I was engaged to get married and deeply in love with the man. I was faced with that temptation and lost, I gave my virginity away against Gods plans and wishes to someone I loved and was looking forward to spending the rest of my life with. I felt horrible afterwards, I was convicted of my sin right after doing it, I confessed and asked forgiveness. A month later my fiance broke it off and just wanted to remain friends. I was hurt even more, but that was the consequences for my sin, and I had no one else to blame but myself.
Now I feel like used goods and whenever I am in a relationship or someone seems interested to be in a relationship with me, I come right out and tell them so that they know. Because God calls us all to be virgins until marriage, and the guy has the right to choose whether he wants to continue being in a relationship with me or not.
From this experience, I have learned to be more understanding to those that are truly deep in love with someone and ends up giving into temptation. And I have been on the other side of it and now I know the regret and pain that can come from not waiting until marriage.
God made that law for our own good, to protect our hearts, and to protect our health. And I for one wish I would have continued to be strong and wished I would have waited until I was married.
I have been both on the receiving end of grace and understanding from men and one that verbally cussed me out and told me "I hate you". It hurt and opened up old wounds again, but I knew my God had forgiven me and that is all that mattered. I have new choices to make and again, I am standing strong in wanting to keep from sex until marriage.
I agree that no one should be judged for past deeds as long as they have repented and turn from continuing in that sin. And yes things like rape happen and children are brought into this world, and that also should never be held against anyone. But each person including dothackzero, has the right to choose what kind of person they want in their life. He is young and has his whole life ahead of him. And if he feels God is calling him at this time to not be with someone who has children, then who are we to judge. He may have a life plan, of what he wants to accomplish before settling down and having a family. I did not see him as just judging a woman for having a kid and not wanting to have anything to do with her purely due to what happened in her past. I viewed his post as one searching for something God called us all to be until marriage and expressing his frustrations on how difficult it seems to be as a young man being able to find a virgin...which truly saddens the heart that so many young men
and women don't seem to care about this command from God.
In the end, it is dothackzero's choice in who and what he wants to have in a relationship. It really is none of our business. At my age I would love to find a man that is still a virgin, but that is unrealistic, and also at my age, I really do not want kids anymore, so to find someone that doesn't have children and is my age is very difficult, but I will not turn anyone away as long as I know he is from God and he is the one God wants for me. At the moment I am in a relationship with a younger guy, as I said, at my age I really do not want kids anymore, but if this man does, and we get married, and God decides to bless us in that way then I will happily accept.
But in the end it is each individuals preference as well as what God lays upon our heart, and that is between God and that person alone. If God presses upon someones heart that He has plans for them to marry a woman without kids and still a virgin, then who are we to say otherwise.
dothackzero's, I respect you for being your age and wanting a virgin. Good for you! And do not ever let society pressure you into doing something that you do not want to do, or something that is against Gods commands. Just follow your heart and listen to God, that is all that matters.
Blessings to you all.