I tend to agree with you.
The real test, IMO, is in how they respond to being corrected about the matter. And that's not just true for being corrected about hyper-grace theology, but for other things to. Being able and willing to change and conform to God's truth is a sign that you have God's grace.
The programming and bondage of your human fleshly, selfish, over indulgent, conditional loving ways.
Of course you mean what is it that GOD wants people to do to prove they are believers and truly born again.
Well, here's an example:
"14Do all things without grumbling or disputing; 15so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world, 16holding fast the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I will have reason to glory because I did not run in vain nor toil in vain."-Philippians 2:14-16
The key is in the 'grumbling and complaining'. By nature we are selfish and will only do things gladly and easily if they serve our personal interests and tastes and well being. If I do good for someone because they are an attractive or talented person or popular person and I want to win this person's attention or favor, or I do it because I'll get a raise, or the person I'm serving is valuable to me somehow, that is evil conditional human love--love that is conditioned on the value to us of who or what is being served.
But that is not how God loves. He loves by doing things because they are the right and good thing to do for the person receiving the love, irregardless of personal gain or comfort for doing so (human love loves for it's own benefit and good), and irregardless of the person deserving that love. That's how we are supposed to love. That is the obedience that shows we have God's supernatural love in us in a salvation experience. That is the narrow road and narrow gate that leads to life that Jesus says few find.
Which church, you ask? The Evangelical churches this side of the great divide between Catholicism and Protestantism. Those churches.
We Evangelical Protestants don't understand how works are necessary in salvation without them earning salvation for us. We do not even understand the nature of works of the Spirit very well in the first place. Let alone how they are the required manifestation of saving faith in the person who has the love of God in them in salvation.