I need counsel!!! Is love wrong between friends and family?

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soberxp

soberxp

Senior Member
#21
May 3, 2018
2,511
482
83
#21
I don't quite understand your question, if you're referring to the fact that consanguineous marriages are forbidden in modern society, which I don't think it's in the Bible.

If you're referring to you must love God more than your family and friends,What the Bible means is that you love your family and friends according to God's Word, not that you can't love them but God.

Remember to base all your actions and habits on God's Word first.Just like Abraham didn't question God's word, why should I kill my own son？Obedience to word of God is a virtue and the origin of faith.

In fact, God didn't really want Abraham to kill his own child, but wanted him to obey God's word unconditionally.
 
NOV25

NOV25

Well-known member
#22
Nov 23, 2019
995
390
63
#22
tourist said:
Christian Chat is as good a resource as any that might provide meaningful spiritual counsel based on sound biblical principles.
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You must work here? 🤣
Christian chat, in no way, compares to submitting oneself to elders at a biblical church.

As I said before @DanielShort, find a biblical church in your area and labor with the elders there.
 
Pilgrimshope

Pilgrimshope

Well-known member
#23
Sep 2, 2020
14,669
5,911
113
#23
DanielShort said:
Why does The Bible not say that you cannot be in love with your friends and family members? / Is there a difference between love and sex? / What kinds of physical affection are meant to be sexual? And what kinds are meant to be love?
I already believe that there are two different kinds of hugs: an agape hug (a gesture that you care); and a hug that feels like two hearts becoming one heart, that is deeply spiritual, and that feels like what I would imagine falling in love to feel like; are both kinds good between friends and family? And what about kissing on the mouth? Is it part of sex? Or is it part of love? The Bible practically encourages kissing between brothers and sisters in Christ, in 1 Peter 5:14 and other places, but nowhere does it specify that you cannot kiss friends and family on the mouth. The only thing I could find is in proverbs, where it warns against kissing strange women (women you don't know, or women who clearly have sexual intentions).
If I have access to all knowledge that pertains to life and godliness, 2 Peter 1:3, why am I so confused? If love is wrong, why does The Bible not say so?
I know that The Bible says that sex is wrong outside of the marriage of one adult man and one adult women, but it does not say that love is sexual or wrong between anyone.
I am asking these questions because I feel like people have confused the difference between love and sex; and I believe that the true enemy is capable of making good things look bad in order to set the forces of light against each other. I am worried that homosexuality exists, not only because of sin, but also because of deceptions about the difference between love and sex.
I have no experience in these matters, I have never kissed anyone, I have never even been in love. The love I have for my friends and family is a very stoic agape love.
I am trying to get council from other Christians; I would appreciate input from anyone, but if you reply to this please let me know if you are "born again," your opinions will, quite honestly, hold more weight to me if you are truly saved.
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yeah humans confused love and corrupted it with lust

Brotherly love is what the Bible talks about we wouldn’t have sexual intentions and lusts towards our brother or sister but can have amazing bonds of love with them at the same time

there’s a difference in what God says love is and what humans corrupted ot to mean in our minds Gods things are always pure ours always corrupt
We share his love between one another and it leaves the corruption through lust out of the equation just have to learn how to love gods pure and true way from the gospel
 
L

Locoponydirtman

Guest
#24
#24
I dont know how direct one has to say this, but respect other people's space and comfort levels. If you are trying to impose this on others its not love; its you serving your gratification.
I dont hug folks that i dont know are true blue, thick and thin, got ya back brothers. Except for for grannies i hug any old granny that wants one.
 
listenyoumustAll

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
#25
Jul 22, 2021
404
288
63
#25
DanielShort said:
Why does The Bible not say that you cannot be in love with your friends and family members? / Is there a difference between love and sex? / What kinds of physical affection are meant to be sexual? And what kinds are meant to be love?
I already believe that there are two different kinds of hugs: an agape hug (a gesture that you care); and a hug that feels like two hearts becoming one heart, that is deeply spiritual, and that feels like what I would imagine falling in love to feel like; are both kinds good between friends and family? And what about kissing on the mouth? Is it part of sex? Or is it part of love? The Bible practically encourages kissing between brothers and sisters in Christ, in 1 Peter 5:14 and other places, but nowhere does it specify that you cannot kiss friends and family on the mouth. The only thing I could find is in proverbs, where it warns against kissing strange women (women you don't know, or women who clearly have sexual intentions).
If I have access to all knowledge that pertains to life and godliness, 2 Peter 1:3, why am I so confused? If love is wrong, why does The Bible not say so?
I know that The Bible says that sex is wrong outside of the marriage of one adult man and one adult women, but it does not say that love is sexual or wrong between anyone.
I am asking these questions because I feel like people have confused the difference between love and sex; and I believe that the true enemy is capable of making good things look bad in order to set the forces of light against each other. I am worried that homosexuality exists, not only because of sin, but also because of deceptions about the difference between love and sex.
I have no experience in these matters, I have never kissed anyone, I have never even been in love. The love I have for my friends and family is a very stoic agape love.
I am trying to get council from other Christians; I would appreciate input from anyone, but if you reply to this please let me know if you are "born again," your opinions will, quite honestly, hold more weight to me if you are truly saved.
Click to expand...
How ever you look at it friend any emotion energised by lust is ungodly.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#27
Mar 13, 2014
42,665
17,120
113
69
Tennessee
#27
NOV25 said:
You must work here? 🤣
Christian chat, in no way, compares to submitting oneself to elders at a biblical church.

As I said before @DanielShort, find a biblical church in your area and labor with the elders there.
Click to expand...
Personally, I would be apprehensive to submit myself to anyone, including an elder in a church.
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#28
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,609
113
#28
DanielShort said:
Why does The Bible not say that you cannot be in love with your friends and family members? / Is there a difference between love and sex? / What kinds of physical affection are meant to be sexual? And what kinds are meant to be love?
I already believe that there are two different kinds of hugs: an agape hug (a gesture that you care); and a hug that feels like two hearts becoming one heart, that is deeply spiritual, and that feels like what I would imagine falling in love to feel like; are both kinds good between friends and family? And what about kissing on the mouth? Is it part of sex? Or is it part of love? The Bible practically encourages kissing between brothers and sisters in Christ, in 1 Peter 5:14 and other places, but nowhere does it specify that you cannot kiss friends and family on the mouth. The only thing I could find is in proverbs, where it warns against kissing strange women (women you don't know, or women who clearly have sexual intentions).
If I have access to all knowledge that pertains to life and godliness, 2 Peter 1:3, why am I so confused? If love is wrong, why does The Bible not say so?
I know that The Bible says that sex is wrong outside of the marriage of one adult man and one adult women, but it does not say that love is sexual or wrong between anyone.
I am asking these questions because I feel like people have confused the difference between love and sex; and I believe that the true enemy is capable of making good things look bad in order to set the forces of light against each other. I am worried that homosexuality exists, not only because of sin, but also because of deceptions about the difference between love and sex.
I have no experience in these matters, I have never kissed anyone, I have never even been in love. The love I have for my friends and family is a very stoic agape love.
I am trying to get council from other Christians; I would appreciate input from anyone, but if you reply to this please let me know if you are "born again," your opinions will, quite honestly, hold more weight to me if you are truly saved.
Click to expand...
Although you can get good answers around here on rudiments of the faith, I think your level of confusion indicates you might do well to have some direct counseling with your pastor.

I'd recommend you talk to your pastor about something ongoing, like mentoring, or discipleship programs, or some classes.

.
 
NOV25

NOV25

Well-known member
#29
Nov 23, 2019
995
390
63
#29
tourist said:
Personally, I would be apprehensive to submit myself to anyone, including an elder in a church.
Click to expand...
And there it is, my point exactly.

Submitting to elders is a biblical teaching, a command, but here you are teaching the opposite.

I say again @DanielShort, you’re better off laboring with the elders at a biblical church than listening to people here.
 
soberxp

soberxp

Senior Member
#30
May 3, 2018
2,511
482
83
#30
NOV25 said:
And there it is, my point exactly.

Submitting to elders is a biblical teaching, a command, but here you are teaching the opposite.

I say again @DanielShort, you’re better off laboring with the elders at a biblical church than listening to people here.
Click to expand...
You also here.........
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#31
Mar 13, 2014
42,665
17,120
113
69
Tennessee
#31
NOV25 said:
And there it is, my point exactly.

Submitting to elders is a biblical teaching, a command, but here you are teaching the opposite.

I say again @DanielShort, you’re better off laboring with the elders at a biblical church than listening to people here.
Click to expand...
Who is to say that an elder is spiritually sound? Based on the OP I think it would be ludicrous to ask an elder in a church whether or not it is OK to kiss your mother or sister the same as a wife or girlfriend.
 
JohnDB

JohnDB

Well-known member
#32
Jan 16, 2021
6,282
2,561
113
#32
Locoponydirtman said:
I dont know how direct one has to say this, but respect other people's space and comfort levels. If you are trying to impose this on others its not love; its you serving your gratification.
I dont hug folks that i dont know are true blue, thick and thin, got ya back brothers. Except for for grannies i hug any old granny that wants one.
Click to expand...
You do know that Lil ol ladies got that way by sheer meanness....at least that's what Grandma said about her MIL. Those two never got along....ever. Funny and sad to hear 70+ and 90+ women fussing about each other to Grandpa and me.
 
NOV25

NOV25

Well-known member
#34
Nov 23, 2019
995
390
63
#34
If you’re unable to conclude which church and which elders are biblical that’s not a problem with the church, that’s a problem with your discernment.
 
NOV25

NOV25

Well-known member
#39
Nov 23, 2019
995
390
63
#39
Cameron143 said:
I know. I was just having some fun. And I don't think tourist's objection was so much that elders should be qualified as that fewer and fewer today seem to be.
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I was having fun with the Timmy thing too😉

@tourist was abundantly clear 👉 “Personally, I would be apprehensive to submit myself to anyone, including an elder in a church.”
 
Cameron143

Cameron143

Well-known member
#40
Mar 1, 2022
20,091
6,885
113
62
#40
NOV25 said:
I was having fun with the Timmy thing too😉

@tourist was abundantly clear 👉 “Personally, I would be apprehensive to submit myself to anyone, including an elder in a church.”
Click to expand...
I think it is a legitimate concern these days. And it is highlighted in the church these days. From personal experience, it is usually a reaction to past problems and hurts. We sometimes forget that life doesn't happen in a vacuum. I do believe that every Christian should be a part of a local church which necessitates submission to church leadership. But it's quite the individual that suffers harm and remains unchanged.
 
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