Is it Biblically permissive to beat one's wife?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,160
1,787
113
Are you saying that we do not respond in the same way as many mammals? Are you denying that some women do get sexually stimulated by being disciplined?

I think most of us are aware that there are some people who eroticize being spanked or spanking someone else. It might be the most common 'kinky' thing there is. It shows up in jokes or comments in movies, occasionally.

I read about 'Christian Domestic Discipline' many years on a website. So I looked it up online. I saw there were comments from women who were very much in favor of it, and some of the men got involved because their wives instigated it.

There are women who eroticize the idea of their man spanking them, disciplining them, etc. They associate it with masculinity, strength, or whatever.

If a couple have some spanking going on in their bedroom as some kind of sexual (in their mind) activity, is that sinful? Well, if no one is __really hurting___ the other, then I don't really have a strong opinion on that myself. Is it loving? Maybe for them it is sex. It can get into more of a lifestyle thing, where a woman finds a man who is 'in charge' by spanking her if she doesn't live up to his standards is an erotic thing, or something like that. At some point it gets weird to me. I am speaking of my own impressions and feelings on the matter. People can do all kinds of stuff in their bedrooms that might embarrass them if they told others, from lingerie they wear, or rubber suits, or dressing up like a nurse or Batman, or whatever it is people do. Most people probably do little of this, except lingerie which might be kind of popular.

Bedroom play in marriage is different from what most of us think of when we read 'wife beating.'

The Bible does not directly mention wife beating that I know of. But since we are talking about hitting someone, why not consider it form the perspective of what the Old Testament specifically authorized. It allowed disciplining a slave. On the other hand, the New Testament forbade threatening a slave. Beating is more extreme than threatening, so why would beating be allowed for Christians in that type of arrangement. The Proverbs also talk about physical discipline of children. Where did the Old Testament authorize physical discipline of wives.

I'm not a liberal when it comes to gender issues either. I think our society is probably less patriarchal than would be optimal for a society. I do not agree with the underlying assumption that I see from a lot of US evangelicals that God's spiritual plan is to ultimately lead us to certain western values that are not taught in scripture. For example, I do not think it is sinful for the state to allow businesses to require a husband's approval of a wife's financial transaction. I do not see any reason in scripture to think that it is sinful for the state not to allow women the right to vote, or men for that matter. I do not see a mandate for democracy or republics in scripture, either. God gave a number of laws that we might consider patriarchal.

But none of them that I am aware of allow or regulate husbands hitting their wives.
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
13,001
4,314
113
If somebody told me 2+2=green, I wouldn’t say, “Wow, that’s profound. I never thought of that. Maybe you’re right.” I’m well aware that society does not act and think within the confines of Christ-likeness. The world doesn’t program me. I observe behaviour and analyze why people would act like they do. Those who are not born of the spirit have only the flesh to lead them. The chemistry exists in all of us. We have the decision to serve the flesh or serve God. I choose the latter.

so easily deceived with a statement yet no origin of the cause of the statement yet one accepts the effects.

When God's moral standard is well seen and that What God himself would not do like spanking a woman to sexually stimulate her, instead of addressing the perversion of sex which is the cause of the abuse on women and the false narrative it is normal. We do not accept the sinful nature we must battle against it. Not justify it.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
I think most of us are aware that there are some people who eroticize being spanked or spanking someone else. It might be the most common 'kinky' thing there is. It shows up in jokes or comments in movies, occasionally.

I read about 'Christian Domestic Discipline' many years on a website. So I looked it up online. I saw there were comments from women who were very much in favor of it, and some of the men got involved because their wives instigated it.

There are women who eroticize the idea of their man spanking them, disciplining them, etc. They associate it with masculinity, strength, or whatever.

If a couple have some spanking going on in their bedroom as some kind of sexual (in their mind) activity, is that sinful? Well, if no one is __really hurting___ the other, then I don't really have a strong opinion on that myself. Is it loving? Maybe for them it is sex. It can get into more of a lifestyle thing, where a woman finds a man who is 'in charge' by spanking her if she doesn't live up to his standards is an erotic thing, or something like that. At some point it gets weird to me. I am speaking of my own impressions and feelings on the matter. People can do all kinds of stuff in their bedrooms that might embarrass them if they told others, from lingerie they wear, or rubber suits, or dressing up like a nurse or Batman, or whatever it is people do. Most people probably do little of this, except lingerie which might be kind of popular.

Bedroom play in marriage is different from what most of us think of when we read 'wife beating.'

The Bible does not directly mention wife beating that I know of. But since we are talking about hitting someone, why not consider it form the perspective of what the Old Testament specifically authorized. It allowed disciplining a slave. On the other hand, the New Testament forbade threatening a slave. Beating is more extreme than threatening, so why would beating be allowed for Christians in that type of arrangement. The Proverbs also talk about physical discipline of children. Where did the Old Testament authorize physical discipline of wives.

I'm not a liberal when it comes to gender issues either. I think our society is probably less patriarchal than would be optimal for a society. I do not agree with the underlying assumption that I see from a lot of US evangelicals that God's spiritual plan is to ultimately lead us to certain western values that are not taught in scripture. For example, I do not think it is sinful for the state to allow businesses to require a husband's approval of a wife's financial transaction. I do not see any reason in scripture to think that it is sinful for the state not to allow women the right to vote, or men for that matter. I do not see a mandate for democracy or republics in scripture, either. God gave a number of laws that we might consider patriarchal.

But none of them that I am aware of allow or regulate husbands hitting their wives.
and to some God will say I NEVER KNEW YOU
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,160
1,787
113
that is not how you come across
SophieT,

You have been trying to police what I say. You interject into a conversation in which someone listed requirements one spouse should give to another in order to continue to live together. I commented on this and various issues and you keep responding to my posts without considering the context of my comments and saying that the thread was about the question, "Is it Biblically permissive to beat one's wife?" Other little subtopics come up in these threads and we discuss them all. I haven't notice you policing all the other threads to everyone only narrowly discussing a question in the title. And if you did, you should not. If you aren't the moderator, that's just pestering other posters. Some of your posts also seem kind of mocking, and I do not care for it.

If you do not like the little subtopics I have brought up, you can just not respond to them, instead of starting to talk about them, then insisting they are off topic.

I also noticed after I rebuffed you for that, you responded to one of my posts with "and to some God will say I NEVER KNEW YOU" which makes it sound like you are now questioning my salvation.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
You have been trying to police what I say.
here's the op again. I think you forgot it.

1 Peter 2:20-25 Proof text used by a study.

Easy-to-Read Version

20 But if you are punished for doing wrong, there is no reason to praise you for bearing that punishment. But if you suffer for doing good and you are patient, this pleases God. 21 This is what you were chosen to do. Christ gave you an example to follow. He suffered for you. So you should do the same as he did:
22 “He never sinned,
and he never told a lie.”
23 People insulted him, but he did not insult them back. He suffered, but he did not threaten anyone. No, he let God take care of him. God is the one who judges rightly. 24 Christ carried our sins in his body on the cross. He did this so that we would stop living for sin and live for what is right. By his wounds you were healed. 25 You were like sheep that went the wrong way. But now you have come back to the Shepherd and Protector of your lives.
"

From the Study, A link to the below study was part of a link posted. I do not agree with beating one's wife.

"f. Submission to an unbelieving husband, partnership with a believing wife. Submission and living with an unbelieving husband. In 1Pet.3v1-6., Peter gives a totally different emphasis, he states how a Christian wife must act if they are married to an unbeliever. a) Many more women than men have been converted in Church history, so the combination of a believing wife with an unbelieving husband has been a common occurrence. A Christian woman must not argue with or preach at their unbelieving husband, but submit, and win their husbands without a word. In 1Pet.2v11 to 3v8., Peter suggests that a Christian wife should be prepared to stand some abuse, he says “Likewise ye wives,” and infers that wives are to stand some buffeting like slaves, and be submissive even to the harsh, and take ill treatment patiently like Jesus. Submission means that we trust God to work things out, like Jesus, who though brutally treated, “kept entrusting himself to Him who judges righteously.” 1Pet.2v23. " https://truthforthelastdays.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/marriage_and_divorce.pdf

1 Peter 3:1
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

1 Peter 1:22
Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently:

Ephesians 5:28
So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.


1 Peter 2:23
King James Version
23 Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that ju
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,160
1,787
113
When God's moral standard is well seen and that What God himself would not do like spanking a woman to sexually stimulate her, instead of addressing the perversion of sex which is the cause of the abuse on women and the false narrative it is normal. We do not accept the sinful nature we must battle against it. Not justify it.
Do you think a husband giving his wife a massage with those little karate chops-- is that Swedish massage?-- is sinful? He's hitting her? If you say now, what if she says, "Oh, I like that. Now, do it with the palms of your hand." Uh-oh, he spanked her. Now he's sinful.

My wife is not into spanking. I've never been put in the weird position of being told, 'Spank me.' But if it isn't hard enough to cause damage, and a couple are playing around-- as long as they don't tell you about it or post about it on a forum like this, why should it bother you? What is the basis for saying it is sinful? The Bible does not say, "Thou shalt not spank thy wife if she likes it as a form of foreplay." That's different from wife beating, wife 'discipline', etc., but it is 'spanking a woman to sexually stimulate her.' It's weird. But weird doesn't mean sinful necessarily.

My impression from the blog responses I saw years ago when I looked up this movement is that a lot of them are into something more severe than what I described above, and some of the couples into it got into it because at the instigation of the wives. I don't know enough about it to know if it is the majority.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,160
1,787
113
here's the op again. I think you forgot it.

1 Peter 2:20-25 Proof text used by a study.

Easy-to-Read Version
If you will notice, the passage includes the topic of slaves being beaten for doing what is right, and how that is commendable before God. I addressed some of the themes the author of the OP was trying to pull together.

But, again, I am not aware that you were made moderator of the forum.
 

BrokenSparrow

Senior Member
Sep 12, 2016
437
145
43
Is it Biblically permissive to beat one's wife?

NO!

End of story. It's really that simple.

"NO"!
 
S

SophieT

Guest
If you will notice, the passage includes the topic of slaves being beaten for doing what is right, and how that is commendable before God. I addressed some of the themes the author of the OP was trying to pull together.

But, again, I am not aware that you were made moderator of the forum.
if you don't think I am a mod, then why do you keep explaining yourself to me? shrugs

wives are not slaves in the eyes of God.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,160
1,787
113
if you don't think I am a mod, then why do you keep explaining yourself to me? shrugs
Because I would prefer for us to interact in a reasonable manner.

wives are not slaves in the eyes of God.
Nor was that my point. Go back and read my posts if you are curious.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
Nor was that my point. Go back and read my posts if you are curious.
any ones in particular or just the ones that had nothing to do with the op?

do you actually have a point that is about the op that I might find helpful or interesting ?
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
Is it Biblically permissive to beat one's wife?

Of course not! What a foolish title for a thread! :rolleyes:

Matthew
22:37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
22:38 This is the first and great commandment.
22:39 And the second [is] like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
22:40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

Is that difficult for anyone to understand? If you need something to beat on, I could point you in a different (yet familiar) direction.
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
so easily deceived with a statement yet no origin of the cause of the statement yet one accepts the effects.

When God's moral standard is well seen and that What God himself would not do like spanking a woman to sexually stimulate her, instead of addressing the perversion of sex which is the cause of the abuse on women and the false narrative it is normal. We do not accept the sinful nature we must battle against it. Not justify it.
Once again you troll me in with your naivety. Understanding is not justifying. Do you think spanking a child is ok?
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
actually yellow and blue make green.

you can say one thing about yourself and even believe it, but you do not have me convinced and I suspect, I am not alone
You totally understood the message. Good job. For the record I don’t believe in evolution OR spanking women. Your assumptions are based on your imagination. I never promoted either. I will however give credit where credit is due. You’re correct about one thing, yellow and blue make green. Gold star!
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
do you have any biblical response to the question of the thread? I am glad you are done. You are fully aware of HOW God wants US to be? Wow, impressive most Christian look at the word of God to define that.

Mostly in context to the New Testament.

With the word “flesh” we are dealing with something else. Only very rarely does the Biblical phrase “the flesh” (ἡ σὰρξ (he sarx), in Greek) refer only to the physical body (eg. John 6:53; Phil 3:2; 1 John 4:2) , but almost always the phrase refers to something quite distinct from the physical body.

What then is meant by the term “the flesh” (ἡ σὰρξ)? Perhaps most plainly it refers to that part of us that is alienated from God.

It is the rebellious, unruly and obstinate part of our inner self that is operative all the time. It is that part of us that does not want to be told what to do. It is stubborn, refuses correction, and does not want to have a thing to do with God.

It bristles at limits and rules. It recoils at anything that might cause me to be diminished or something less than the center of the universe. The flesh hates to be under authority or to have to yield to anything other than its own wishes and desires.

The flesh deal with the sinful nature

The flesh is in direct conflict with the spirit.


1. The Flesh does not grasp spiritual teachings – [Jesus said] The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. (John 6:63)

2. The flesh is not willing to depend on anyone or anything outside its own power or control

3. The Flesh hates to be told what to do

4. Flesh is as flesh doesThose who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the spirit have their minds set on what the spirit desires. The concern of the flesh is death, but the concern of the spirit is life and peace (Rom 8:5-6)


5. The Flesh is intrinsically hostile to God – The mind of the flesh is hostile to God. It does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the flesh cannot please God. (Rom 8:7-8)

6. The Flesh abuses freedomYou, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another in love. (Gal 5:13)

7. The Flesh Demands to be fed – So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. (Gal 5:16-17)

8. The Flesh fuels sin – The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God (Gal 5:19-210)


here end your lesson and be free from your addictions :)
Do you have a car?
 
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
I think most of us are aware that there are some people who eroticize being spanked or spanking someone else. It might be the most common 'kinky' thing there is. It shows up in jokes or comments in movies, occasionally.

I read about 'Christian Domestic Discipline' many years on a website. So I looked it up online. I saw there were comments from women who were very much in favor of it, and some of the men got involved because their wives instigated it.

There are women who eroticize the idea of their man spanking them, disciplining them, etc. They associate it with masculinity, strength, or whatever.

If a couple have some spanking going on in their bedroom as some kind of sexual (in their mind) activity, is that sinful? Well, if no one is __really hurting___ the other, then I don't really have a strong opinion on that myself. Is it loving? Maybe for them it is sex. It can get into more of a lifestyle thing, where a woman finds a man who is 'in charge' by spanking her if she doesn't live up to his standards is an erotic thing, or something like that. At some point it gets weird to me. I am speaking of my own impressions and feelings on the matter. People can do all kinds of stuff in their bedrooms that might embarrass them if they told others, from lingerie they wear, or rubber suits, or dressing up like a nurse or Batman, or whatever it is people do. Most people probably do little of this, except lingerie which might be kind of popular.

Bedroom play in marriage is different from what most of us think of when we read 'wife beating.'

The Bible does not directly mention wife beating that I know of. But since we are talking about hitting someone, why not consider it form the perspective of what the Old Testament specifically authorized. It allowed disciplining a slave. On the other hand, the New Testament forbade threatening a slave. Beating is more extreme than threatening, so why would beating be allowed for Christians in that type of arrangement. The Proverbs also talk about physical discipline of children. Where did the Old Testament authorize physical discipline of wives.

I'm not a liberal when it comes to gender issues either. I think our society is probably less patriarchal than would be optimal for a society. I do not agree with the underlying assumption that I see from a lot of US evangelicals that God's spiritual plan is to ultimately lead us to certain western values that are not taught in scripture. For example, I do not think it is sinful for the state to allow businesses to require a husband's approval of a wife's financial transaction. I do not see any reason in scripture to think that it is sinful for the state not to allow women the right to vote, or men for that matter. I do not see a mandate for democracy or republics in scripture, either. God gave a number of laws that we might consider patriarchal.

But none of them that I am aware of allow or regulate husbands hitting their wives.
This has been an exhausting thread. All I eluded to was that some women wouldn’t mind being disciplined by corporal punishment. Like you said about it being a demonstration of dominance and authority, in a world that no longer properly defines masculinity correctly, it is substitute for the carnal cravings to procreate with genetic superiority by females.
 

Mem

Senior Member
Sep 23, 2014
7,108
2,141
113
Once again you troll me in with your naivety. Understanding is not justifying. Do you think spanking a child is ok?
Do you consider it as reasonably logical that a woman is equivalent to a child?
 
S

SophieT

Guest
You totally understood the message. Good job. For the record I don’t believe in evolution OR spanking women. Your assumptions are based on your imagination. I never promoted either. I will however give credit where credit is due. You’re correct about one thing, yellow and blue make green. Gold star!
for the record, your posts, for the most part, in this thread, are disgusting

This has been an exhausting thread. All I eluded to was that some women wouldn’t mind being disciplined by corporal punishment. Like you said about it being a demonstration of dominance and authority, in a world that no longer properly defines masculinity correctly, it is substitute for the carnal cravings to procreate with genetic superiority by females
masochism is actually referred to as a 'condition', aka aberrant behavior.

some get their jollies in indulging in it and some get their jollies in talking about it and some get their jollies in imagining the looks on the faces of Christians who did not expect to find these posts in a thread that is basically nothing but click bait

here is your 1st post, #17 from this thread:

I’m not writing this from a Biblical perspective but you can’t deny this. Spanking is a huge turn on for some women. It has nothing to do with violence. It’s not like a rage induced beating. It’s a demonstration of dominance and authority. Granted “Fifty Shades of Grey” was a worldly poorly written book series. These books woke up a passion in MANY women. Carnally a woman is sexually driven to a dominant man to reproduce but psychologically driven to a fun man to spend time with. I did my research. More women than you think are ok with, even sexually stimulated by a man who lovingly administers a firm spanking when she admittedly “gets out of line”. Be clear, this is not about an uncontrolled beating. This is a disciplinary spanking. I can’t wait to see the thumbs down and Xs to follow.

you will note where you say I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE THUMBS DOWN AND X'S TO FOLLOW

an amateur psychiatrist will understand you are baiting people and anticipating an outcry for what you wrote. a professional, will understand that you are turned on by what you are posting about