If it's ok, I'd like to address some of this.
First off, I don't believe there will be any children or babies in Hell. In fact, I think a large amount of the residents of Heaven will be children.
Matthew 19:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.
That might be more literal than we think. Also, Paul says this:
Romans 7:9 New King James Version (NKJV)
9 I was alive once without the law, but when the commandment came, sin revived and I died.
The only time he could have been alive without the Law was when he was too young to understand it. So his sin as a child was not imputed to him. I think we are on safe ground saying Jesus's Blood covers children.
As to the larger issue of election, I have changed my position somewhat. Especially with the knowledge of hindsight looking back on my own life and God's loving care and direction He has shown me.
So a couple of questions and thoughts.
Since we know we had NOTHING to do with our physical birth, why would we think we had the tiniest bit to do, and yes I think that includes choosing Him, with our Spiritual Birth? We were dead. We need to contemplate that fact and not just give a nod to it. A dead person can do NOTHING but be dead.
John 1:12 But as many as received Him, to them He gave the [
e]right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name: 13 who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh,
NOR OF THE WILL OF MAN, but of God.
You rightly say that it is belief through faith that saves. However, where does that faith come from? I think the verse you cite in Ephesians gives us this answer;
Ephesians 2:8-9 New King James Version (NKJV)
8 For by grace you have been saved through faith,
AND THAT not of yourselves;
it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast.
The "and that" is the faith IN ADDITION to the Grace.
All of us need to examine WHY WE BELIEVE. We heard the Gospel. WE responded in belief. BUT WHY? Multitudes of others have heard yet they don't believe.
WE believe because God has GIVEN us the faith to believe. There is no other explanation without somehow taking credit or boasting as the verse in Ephesians points out. I fully admit in my own, human intellect this seems off, because in my human intellect I reason that if God gave only SOME people faith unto Salvation, it must follow that He didn't give others faith unto Salvation.
I think we'd all agree God knows the end from the beginning. There is nothing we will ever do that can surprise Him.
I think we'd all also agree that God formed us in the womb.
So picture God creating a person while knowing that person is doomed for destruction, or eternal life. If that is not the case, then He either didn't create all, or He doesn't know who are His until they choose.
EXTREMELY difficult for my 3 pound human brain to comprehend. So in the final analysis I think He has called me to love everyone, and spread His Gospel to ALL people and let HIM handle the rest.