Should I lie about church?

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umzza

Senior Member
Jan 10, 2015
389
65
28
#1
I've been trying to talk to Christians but when I talk about my doubts about God or problems or being suicidal and depressed and asking for advice or prayer they seem to get tired of it and stop talking to me. I've been thinking about lying about church and how I am with God to see if they talk again. Like if I talk about God and how great church is and everything they might be happier and want to talk more.
 

Grandpa

Senior Member
Jun 24, 2011
10,424
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#2
Regular people aren't really equipped to deal with psychological problems and mental illness. To seek this kind of help, even from people you think of as friends, can be quite a burden.

What if their advice makes it worse? No Christian wants to make someone else feel worse. Especially not something that could be irreversible.

On the other hand, no Christian should ever refuse to pray with you asking God for His Help and guidance.
 
Sep 9, 2018
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#3
What is wrong with taking your problems straight to God. If he is your father, He is also your Comforter. He will speak to you through His Word. I recommend that you start faithfully reading one chapter of Proverbs a day. There are 31 chapters so you can read according to the date. Pray, and trust God to show you what you need to hear from that Word.

Also, if you are a Christian (only you know your relationship with God through Jesus Christ and whether you have asked Him to save you) you also have the Holy Spirit Who will lead, guide and direct you. Pray for a daily filling, or presence, of the Spirit in your life and be sensitive to His guidance.

You appear to be finding strength through your own flesh and your own understanding . . . that is not going to cut it. You need supernatural help which only the God of the universe can provide.

And here is God's telephone number . . . Jeremiah 33:3

"Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not."

He'll do it too! Or He ain't God.
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
11,031
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#4
Are you getting professional help for your depression? I hope so.

As for doubts and fears, people just want everything to be happy and nice. But, that is NOT the reality of living in this world. I agree that people pretend in church, and I know I have done it, particularly when I was depressed, after I got a debiliating physical illness. People understood I was suffering physically, but not that mental suffering was the logical outcome of being in pain, and watching your body get deformities.

God did bring me through it, through reading the Bible. But also getting on better meds for my RA. If you are someone who is depressed with no physical reason, the church can be merciless about it.

So, you want to know if you go back to church and pretend to be normal, is that ok? In other words lie? Well, you wouldn't be any different than maybe 90% of church members who have done at one time or another. However, the fact is, if you act happy, and people respond, perhaps you actually will feel better? I know it has happened to me!

As for doubts, ask the questions here! There are many godly people who can help you. If they can refrain from simpliestic answers about your mental health! I can also give you books to read, besides the Bible, which may answer your questions. Oh, and do be reading the Bible daily. That is one thing that helped me in a million ways, over the last 38 years since I was saved.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
17,489
4,006
113
#5
I've been trying to talk to Christians but when I talk about my doubts about God or problems or being suicidal and depressed and asking for advice or prayer they seem to get tired of it and stop talking to me. I've been thinking about lying about church and how I am with God to see if they talk again. Like if I talk about God and how great church is and everything they might be happier and want to talk more.
I would love to be able to advise you on the Way Christ has given you but because you mentioned suicidal thoughts, I realize I am not qualified to have extended dialogue with you. God forbid I may suggest something that leads the wrng way.

If you study just the Words of Jesus Christ, keeping in mind always it is the Good News, you should be fine, for He is Love. Should you read anything that sounds harsh, do as Mary did when she did not undrstand, keep it in your heart for later understandign because none of the Gospel is bad news…...

As for suicide, I have a close relative who committed suicide. I am settled on the subject and know all will be well, but this is due to what occurre, not myu saying iit is good to do.

Stay here with the Body Members of Christ, have patience, pray and wait for your solution, for there always is One, Christ, Jesus our Salvation.
 

Locoponydirtman

Well-known member
Oct 9, 2018
2,835
1,703
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Texas
#6
I knew a guy sometime ago who would want to talk about his problems and issues but when given advice he never did the things he was told to do. He just wanted to talk and talk every week but never take the answers given. Eventually people quit bothering to listen to him.
Another guy I know came to our men's group. He always wanted to talk about how his relationship with his son was disfunctional. We gave him Biblical steps to take and personal actions to incorporate. The next week when he came talking about it we asked him if he had taken the steps given him. His answer was no. We simply told him until he took the steps and did the things we gave him to do, he wasn't allowed to speak to us about it. He never did the thing prescribed and he eventually left the group.
I'm guessing you have been given wise advise, or you need to find another church. I have read in this very thread wise advise and I have never been to a church where they are unwilling to give counsel.
 
Sep 9, 2018
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#7
He just wanted to talk and talk every week but never take the answers given.
There are those that don't really want help to fix the problem, they only want a band aid to make it feel better. I am not saying this is the case on this thread, but your reply is a quite common experience with biblical counselors. A professional shrink will charge them thousands of dollar - preachers are usually free.

God is more interested in seeing a soul saved than He is in temporary fixes. If a man is truly saved, the solution is quite often found in the fact that the person with the issues is mastered by the 'lusts of the flesh.' Through maturity one learns to live by the fruits of the Spirit and His daily filling for power over the flesh.

Romans contrast of the man living under the flesh and then under the Spirit is given in Romans chapter 7 and 8. The word 'I' is used 33 times in chapter 7 and two times in chapter 8.
 

OneFaith

Senior Member
Sep 5, 2016
2,203
345
83
#8
I've been trying to talk to Christians but when I talk about my doubts about God or problems or being suicidal and depressed and asking for advice or prayer they seem to get tired of it and stop talking to me. I've been thinking about lying about church and how I am with God to see if they talk again. Like if I talk about God and how great church is and everything they might be happier and want to talk more.
First of all (((hugs))). True christians care. The bible says to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. When your brother in Christ is hurting you don't sit there laughing cause things are going good with you, you react. Christ has one body, and when a member hurts the whole body hurts. What do you do when you have a painful stomach ache? Do you not place your hand on it? Does not your whole body curl in closer to comfort it?

I sympathise with you, I've been there. Christians saying "I only want to surround myself with happy people." That is the most self-centered thing to say, "I care only how things effect me, not you." Moses was depressed to the point of asking God to take his life, are these so called christians going to diss him too? When everyone was in tears when Lazarus died, was Christ laughing it up in conversation? Did He leave to avoid being around sad people? No- He mourned with those who mourned because He cared about their feelings. He knew He would bring Lazarus back, He was reacting to the pain of his brothers and sisters, because He has a heart.

I watch the show Friends, and I cringe when Pheobe mentions something drastic that happened to her, and her so-called friends just brush her off with "Anyways..," They should hug her and tell her they care that she went through that. When you love someone their pain is your pain, their joy is your joy. Like the hymn goes... "When each can feel his brother's sigh, and with him bear a part. When sorrow flows from eye to eye, and joy from heart to heart."

Unfortunately most of those who are called to be Christians are not genuine, but are self-seeking people with false humility. "Many are called, but few are chosen." Many who warm the pews on Sunday have not the heart to react to someone else's pain. They may not be a professional counselor or whatever, but they can suggest you see one, they can care and pray for you. You should see that caring reaction in their eyes- which are a window to their heart.

I am so sorry many have lacked the love of God in their heart. I care, and I will pray for you.

SONG...
Love one another, for love is of God.
He who loves is born of God, and knows God.
He who does not love does not know God-
For God is love, God IS love.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,698
1,705
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Germany
#9
If your church is so rejecting, maybe u need to find one where you are accepted or talk to your pastor.
We need community and build each other up
 

Kaps89

Well-known member
Nov 19, 2018
219
304
63
Kent, England
#10
I've been trying to talk to Christians but when I talk about my doubts about God or problems or being suicidal and depressed and asking for advice or prayer they seem to get tired of it and stop talking to me. I've been thinking about lying about church and how I am with God to see if they talk again. Like if I talk about God and how great church is and everything they might be happier and want to talk more.
Hello umzza,

I'm going through a similar situation, although I'd never attest to going through the same situation as anyone else.

I was saved back in June and my life before Christ was basically a life full of bondage, addiction and other ungodly behaviours. When I was saved I expected everything to get better instantly. I expected God to work instantly in my life.

I've been off work with depression for two weeks and I'm off for another two now. I've also been prescribed anti-depressants by the doctor. I spoke to the pastor at my church about this and we had a very good conversation, I got given some reading materials and I felt better for it.

However I haven't even attempted to approach anyone else at church because I don't think (or feel) that many, if any would understand. This is probably defeatist thinking and I'm sure many people in my church have suffered with depression.

The one thing that keeps me going, no matter how cliche it sounds, is, God is love. Humans are naturally broken and we all suffer in many ways but God is there for you, no matter what you're going through.

T
 

dcontroversal

Senior Member
Dec 12, 2013
46,195
20,126
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#11
Proverbs 6...There are 7 things that God hates.....a lying tongue is one of the 7 listed............
 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
4,654
995
113
#12
Umzza,
As some here have been saying, we can go to God straight. Sometimes we do need and appreciate other people sharing, listening and helping bear our burdens, but ultimately, we go to God. As i was there too, i mean being in the pit for several yrs, in fact when i first came to cc, i can say God delivered me from the miry clay in His own good time and way. I only knew that even if i was depressed, i went back to His words and His songs. Study all Scriptures on healing--which are all for the glory of God. Cling on to this verse too:

John 15:7 (KJV)
7 If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

Yes, how do you abide in Him and His word? if you hold on to God's word, read and meditate on 3-4 chapters a day, or a verse if that is too much. Be faithful, even in the midst of your troubles. He will guide and comfort, and yes, heal. Some have said they've been sick and not got well. Some have bouts of depressions return. I cannot explain it all, but in my experience, He did deliver me-- and i knew i was not alone all the time i was in the dumps. Keep on praying in the Spirit, praise Him, for the Lord inhabits the praises of His people!