Total Depravity, the way people here seem to be teaching it, and from what I've read elsewhere means that Man can do no good at all, that we are 100% bad 100% of the time, and that we're pretty much useless unless we become a regenerate Christian, and that a Man can't make the choice of his own free will to follow God.
well, i believe in Total Depravity... but, not the way modern Christianity defines it as.
concerning Total Depravity, the Bible doesn't say we are "100% bad 100% of the time", neither does it say we are useless unless we become a Christian... but it does say that God's grace does come first, but more on that a bit later.
I'm getting a small impression that you only have the Calvinistic definition of what soteriology is... from my own viewpoint, I dont hold to that belief, because I dont find it in the Bible. Now, yes, it is true that Word teaches He does draw us to Him through His grace first, the reason being it then becomes His enablement through His prevenient grace, not because we had the power to do so from the beginning. the belief that is starts with us first comes from Semi-Pelagianism. Full Pelagianism, which emerged in the 6th century denies Total Depravity all-together, and states that a man can choose God, and go to heaven, without Divine Aid, or God's Grace. Semi-Pelagianism does not fully deny Total Depravity, but insists that man has a "spark" of divinity within him, which enables him to seek after God... in other words, it starts with us first, and in the end, we find God
from what I've studied, and from what I know concerning the ante-Nicene church, the Word teaches that because the fall of Adam, we are totally depraved... meaning, we can't get into heaven by ourselves... but simply because we cant get into heaven, doesn't mean our free will has been taken away. We see nonbelievers doing good deeds and works all the time in times of trouble, chaos, and distress... but they're not doing it for God. They're doing it for themselves... they're doing it for their owns elfish ambition and purposes, and in the end, no matter what they've done, they still wont we welcomed if they had not repented from their sin.
now, concerning depravity, I'm not under the impression that we are born sinful. The Bible doesn't give that interpretation. A lot of people would say Cain was born a sinner, but fail to take into account of GHenesis 4:1-7, of how God gave him a choice to do either good or evil, and then later in the New Testament, 1 John 3:12, where it says:
"unlike Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his works were evil, and his brother's were righteous."
it does not say he was of the evil one because he was born evil... it says he was of the evil one because his works were evil... he chose to be evil...
even Jesus Christ had to reach a certain age before he could know the difference between good and evil... Isaiah 7:14-17 discusses this in His life.
we also see again in Jeremiah 19:2 where God shuns a sect of Israelites who have turned to a god where it demanded the blood of infants... in this verse, God specifically calls these babies "innocents"
you cited an excellent chapter, Ezekiel 18, and I'll go a step further, 18:20...
The person who sins is the one who will die. A son won't suffer punishment for the father's iniquity, and a father won't suffer punishment for the son's iniquity. The righteousness of the righteous person will be on him, and the wickedness of the wicked person will be on him.
this is the perfect example of how we will be judged, and even how Cain was judged... by our actions.
God cannot predestine someone to burn, and them punish them for something God Himself predestined them to do. That itself is a contradiction, and contradicts 2 Timothy 2:13 "God cannot deny Himself"
Total Depravity simply means that we cannot get into heaven by ourselves... that's the Biblical definition.
now, to get into heaven, it does start with God's grace, and it ends with God's just ruling according to our actions... but it is not strictly His work alone... God cannot force us to do anything, and Satan cannot force us to do anything. our part in His plan for us, and His command for us as Christians, it to walk with Him, live for Him, love Him, obey Him, and have a personal and intimate relationship with Him.
through that, we come to understand His nature and love better, and in doing so, He changes us from the inside, leading us to become righteous... our relationship has to be synergistic with our Father.