I'm sick & tired.

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Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#21
I’m very sorry to hear about your deteriorating health ailments and the disintegration of your family. You truly have endured a lot of pain and heartache.

I really appreciate the honesty in your post. With that same type of honesty, I request that you take some time to answer this question: Do you love Jesus?

It’s such a simple question, yet it also has profound depth. Think about how Peter, who denied the Lord three times, had to hear this question more than once on the same occasion from the risen Jesus (see John 21:14-19).

To further understand the profundity of this question, ponder the material presented by Brother Kel in the video below. If you do, I believe you will find some help in dealing with your current problems.

To answer the question "Do you love Jesus?' I would have to say I don't think I do. I'm sure most if not all other Christians will say everything that's happening is because I don't "love Jesus" and that may be true.

But I don't want to not love Jesus. So why have I been put into all these situations that have caused me to feel this way and why am I being keep here. I didn't always feel this way and it didn't happen overnight. It is impossible for me to just change how I feel given what I deal with day in and day out.
I have also asked many times for Jesus to remove the negative feelings and thoughts because I am incapable of doing it myself?
 

Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#22
On disappointment, what are you looking to change? Our bodies and lives are affected by sin, disease, decay, the sin of others, the fallen world, spiritual warfare, and God. We must always remember this world is only temporary. Our bodies are not designed to last forever. We at some point must accept that and rationalize our home is in Heaven. If God chooses not to heal then what does that make God to you? A disappointment? A failure? Evil? Unloving? Sovereign? Or out of faith can you still love God like Job even though so many questions may never be answered until death?
 

Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#23
I have contemplated everything you have said and much more many times. I do derive some comfort in hoping that I will have a better life in heaven. But what has happened and what is happening now has my attention and it's impossible for me to ignore.
 

Toto

Member
Apr 4, 2021
48
18
8
#24
I have been living in extreme physical discomfort with bouts of very extreme pain for more than 20 years and has taken a toll on my mental health. Many parts of my body are effected in one way or another, literally from my toes and finger tips to the top of my head. Some problems are constant some intermittent, but nothing goes away and stays away. I'm self employed and my physical problems make it difficult to make a living and I can only manage to earn enough to be around poverty level. I tried for many years to get help from doctors and God but it was to no avail. I have given up on doctors as it became obvious they are unwilling to make any real effort to help beyond prescribing drugs to mask symptoms, so I have put it all in Gods hands.
I met and brought to the lord the woman I married and stayed married to her for 28 years and we had a son late in our marriage. Despite the fact that My wife and I got along great she decided her and our son were better off without me. I don't doubt my physical difficulties played a major part in her decision as I have never raised a hand to her and almost never raised my voice. But the divorce broke my heart and it's still broken even after 7 years.
All of that brings me to the sick & tired part. Despite over the years my praying multiple times a day asking for healing & forgiveness for myself and those on my prayer list, reading the bible at least once a day, attending worship services and singing praises at least once a week, plus tithing and giving my time and other monies to help others. I have yet to receive any noticeable relief from my misery. In fact things only get worse.
I have no patience anymore, Satan has beat it out of me. I'm angry at God for allowing Satan to rob me of my health, my marriage and my sanity. I don't feel I'm asking to much of God to relieve some of my suffering, but he has chosen not to. I understand that Satan is always on the prowl seeking to devour and I don't expect things to be perfect, but I do expect God to answer at least some of my prayers.
I'm not Job, but there are striking similarities to what he went through and what I'm going through. But I doubt everything I lost will be restored to me in the few remaining years I have left on this earth.
And yes I am a born again Christian and like everyone else, I'm far from perfect. I also realize that my reward is waiting in heaven, BUT what I constantly endure brings doubt into my mind about my salvation and I have been getting so frustrated and angry with God that I have been taking his name in vane and it's is happening more and more often. I'm at the end of my rope and feel I'm being hypocritical because I profane God's name and want to give up and stop praying, attending Church, basically everything. I know it's not going to help but so far it seems that nothing helps. So I feel like I'm just wasting my time, heck Sunday could be another day I could try and earn more money. I could sure use it. And then there's the tithing and other donations I could use to fix my house or my truck.
My point being. Why am I doing all of this stuff only to be given so much pain & despair while on this earth?

Am I asking to much to be blessed with some relief from my suffering?
I am so sorry to hear about your terrible suffering. I can only advise you to please please please persevere with God, and ask Him to give you the strength to endure. Also it might help you to realise that God does not expect you to give tithes or even offerings when you yourself are in financial need. God bless you x x x
 

EternalFire

Well-known member
Jan 3, 2019
658
351
63
#25
To answer the question "Do you love Jesus?' I would have to say I don't think I do. I'm sure most if not all other Christians will say everything that's happening is because I don't "love Jesus" and that may be true.

But I don't want to not love Jesus. So why have I been put into all these situations that have caused me to feel this way and why am I being keep here. I didn't always feel this way and it didn't happen overnight. It is impossible for me to just change how I feel given what I deal with day in and day out.
I have also asked many times for Jesus to remove the negative feelings and thoughts because I am incapable of doing it myself?
I surely can’t answer why you have experienced all these things. What I do know is that regardless of what we experience, we are to love Jesus and his God.

Consider Christ’s sufferings. Even though he always did those things that pleased God, he learned obedience by the things which he suffered (Hebrews 5:8). If Christ had to learn obedience, should not we?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,556
17,025
113
69
Tennessee
#26
To answer the question "Do you love Jesus?' I would have to say I don't think I do. I'm sure most if not all other Christians will say everything that's happening is because I don't "love Jesus" and that may be true.

But I don't want to not love Jesus. So why have I been put into all these situations that have caused me to feel this way and why am I being keep here. I didn't always feel this way and it didn't happen overnight. It is impossible for me to just change how I feel given what I deal with day in and day out.
I have also asked many times for Jesus to remove the negative feelings and thoughts because I am incapable of doing it myself?
Based on your posts in your blog I would have to say that while you may not completely understand Him you do indeed love Jesus.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,556
17,025
113
69
Tennessee
#27
I have contemplated everything you have said and much more many times. I do derive some comfort in hoping that I will have a better life in heaven. But what has happened and what is happening now has my attention and it's impossible for me to ignore.
I find myself thinking about heaven most often these days.
 

Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#28
I am so sorry to hear about your terrible suffering. I can only advise you to please please please persevere with God, and ask Him to give you the strength to endure. Also it might help you to realise that God does not expect you to give tithes or even offerings when you yourself are in financial need. God bless you x x x
For the time being I'm managing to pay my bills along with tithing. This might sound odd but right now just going to Church to fellowship with others has become very difficult to continue to do and if I stop paying my tithe ever week then it will be one more excuse I can use to convince myself not to go.
 

Roughsoul1991

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2016
8,847
4,503
113
#30
I have contemplated everything you have said and much more many times. I do derive some comfort in hoping that I will have a better life in heaven. But what has happened and what is happening now has my attention and it's impossible for me to ignore.
Philippians 1:20-24
New International Version
20 I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. 21 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22 If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! 23 I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; 24 but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body.

Why was it more necessary for Paul to remain in the body even though his longing was to be with Jesus in death?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,556
17,025
113
69
Tennessee
#32
And what is more important -- to understand, or to love?
Do any of us 'understand' Jesus?
Can't say that I fully do. To answer your question I would have to say that it is more important to love Jesus. Even Satan understood Jesus full well yet he did not love Him.
 

GiveThanks

God Will Make A Way
Dec 6, 2020
429
347
63
#33
I have been living in extreme physical discomfort with bouts of very extreme pain for more than 20 years and has taken a toll on my mental health. Many parts of my body are effected in one way or another, literally from my toes and finger tips to the top of my head. Some problems are constant some intermittent, but nothing goes away and stays away. I'm self employed and my physical problems make it difficult to make a living and I can only manage to earn enough to be around poverty level. I tried for many years to get help from doctors and God but it was to no avail. I have given up on doctors as it became obvious they are unwilling to make any real effort to help beyond prescribing drugs to mask symptoms, so I have put it all in Gods hands.
I met and brought to the lord the woman I married and stayed married to her for 28 years and we had a son late in our marriage. Despite the fact that My wife and I got along great she decided her and our son were better off without me. I don't doubt my physical difficulties played a major part in her decision as I have never raised a hand to her and almost never raised my voice. But the divorce broke my heart and it's still broken even after 7 years.
All of that brings me to the sick & tired part. Despite over the years my praying multiple times a day asking for healing & forgiveness for myself and those on my prayer list, reading the bible at least once a day, attending worship services and singing praises at least once a week, plus tithing and giving my time and other monies to help others. I have yet to receive any noticeable relief from my misery. In fact things only get worse.
I have no patience anymore, Satan has beat it out of me. I'm angry at God for allowing Satan to rob me of my health, my marriage and my sanity. I don't feel I'm asking to much of God to relieve some of my suffering, but he has chosen not to. I understand that Satan is always on the prowl seeking to devour and I don't expect things to be perfect, but I do expect God to answer at least some of my prayers.
I'm not Job, but there are striking similarities to what he went through and what I'm going through. But I doubt everything I lost will be restored to me in the few remaining years I have left on this earth.
And yes I am a born again Christian and like everyone else, I'm far from perfect. I also realize that my reward is waiting in heaven, BUT what I constantly endure brings doubt into my mind about my salvation and I have been getting so frustrated and angry with God that I have been taking his name in vane and it's is happening more and more often. I'm at the end of my rope and feel I'm being hypocritical because I profane God's name and want to give up and stop praying, attending Church, basically everything. I know it's not going to help but so far it seems that nothing helps. So I feel like I'm just wasting my time, heck Sunday could be another day I could try and earn more money. I could sure use it. And then there's the tithing and other donations I could use to fix my house or my truck.
My point being. Why am I doing all of this stuff only to be given so much pain & despair while on this earth?

Am I asking to much to be blessed with some relief from my suffering?
Well the first thing i would say is that you cant buy God's blessing by tithing etc.

Im really sorry to hear what you're going through. And i'll pray for you as well.

But God is good. You mentioned that despite being ill, you are still able to work. Give God all the thanks and all the glory, praise God. You are not homeless or starving. To God be the glory. In everything give thanks.

I know its hard, but still give Him thanks. And do continue to pray and seek God for His help. And if their are any good, caring people who you are in contact with, reach out to them if you need assistant. You never know where your help will come from.

When last have you seen your son?
 

Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#34
Well the first thing i would say is that you cant buy God's blessing by tithing etc.

Im really sorry to hear what you're going through. And i'll pray for you as well.

But God is good. You mentioned that despite being ill, you are still able to work. Give God all the thanks and all the glory, praise God. You are not homeless or starving. To God be the glory. In everything give thanks.

I know its hard, but still give Him thanks. And do continue to pray and seek God for His help. And if their are any good, caring people who you are in contact with, reach out to them if you need assistant. You never know where your help will come from.

When last have you seen your son?

If I gave thanks for for just existing and being miserable I would not mean it. But I'm also keenly aware that things could be worse, but they could also be much better.

To answer question about my son, it has been over 7 years and he was 13 at the time.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,055
3,166
113
#35
Whatever you do, Sub, never venture into Christian counselling.
Pretty ironic considering I've spent 10 years counseling many people. And all have told me I should be a counselor. And when I was in counseling myself my own counselor encouraged me to become a counselor. But you read one of my posts so now you have enough knowledge to run your mouth right? No being judgmental on your part, right?

Funny that I anytime I make these suggestions to new people, to help them improve their time on this site, so many Christians get butthurt. If you're offended that I offered advice to help him get more people reading his post, leading to more help offered the problem is on you, not me.

Now go away.
 
M

MoonCresta

Guest
#36
Whatever you do, Sub, never venture into Christian counselling.
Handyman - my heart really sank when I read your letter - really. I, like probably everyone on here, brought your life to the Lord in prayer.
I read through the responses and saw where some people dropped some good nuggets, esp. the one about heaven being our permanent home. I've never lived here, not even as a teenager, as though this life is it. This is such a tiny blip in the life of Moon Cresta, and I've never taken the things everyone else appears to take seriously, like looks or money, or status. Or health - I should have died three times by this point in my life, except for the knowledge and skills given to the doctors by God.

What does matter is your eternal soul. You can't let Satan drag you down, and that's exactly what he's trying to do. Please remember you're not alone in this world and that others have the same experience as you, many of them worse. You are blessed to live in this country where people have the freedom to worship the Lord without threat to life. No one is going to kill you because you have a Bible in your possession. We have so much to thank God for and it's so easy to forget about those things when we're burdened down and depressed.

Just one more thing. I can't help but think of Peter - lost and sinking in an angry sea because he took his eyes off the Lord. Return your eyes to him - he will save you and I KNOW this, because he saved me - and I am most certainly the least of his servants.

Life is not guaranteed to be easy - for some it's harder than others - I can't rationalize why. I know that God does hear your prayers and he does care.
 
Mar 23, 2021
41
26
18
#37
Pretty ironic considering I've spent 10 years counseling many people. And all have told me I should be a counselor. And when I was in counseling myself my own counselor encouraged me to become a counselor. But you read one of my posts so now you have enough knowledge to run your mouth right? No being judgmental on your part, right?

Funny that I anytime I make these suggestions to new people, to help them improve their time on this site, so many Christians get butthurt. If you're offended that I offered advice to help him get more people reading his post, leading to more help offered the problem is on you, not me.

Now go away.
:) No one is 'butt hurt', Sub, and I am not in the least offended. I posted my immediate reaction to a post (yours) which was devoid of empathy. As a counselor myself I recognize an inappropriate reaction to a person in distress.
 
Apr 20, 2021
10
13
3
#38
All of that brings me to the sick & tired part. Despite over the years my praying multiple times a day asking for healing & forgiveness for myself and those on my prayer list, reading the bible at least once a day, attending worship services and singing praises at least once a week, plus tithing and giving my time and other monies to help others. I have yet to receive any noticeable relief from my misery. In fact things only get worse.
Am I asking to much to be blessed with some relief from my suffering?
I'm really sorry to hear this has happened, especially the divorce.. that's upsetting to say the least. But, I took note of this portion because you appear to think the Lord will give you materials blessings and health if you're "nice" to Him. Brother, that's not how it works, just pray and trust in Him, make every effort to follow Him. But we can in no way earn any sort of blessings like those, it's all out of love He provides us with what He wills. And I'll pray for you, I do hope you get closer to Him and find relief from all of this!
 

Handyman62

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2021
599
266
63
Rural South Carolina
#39
I'm really sorry to hear this has happened, especially the divorce.. that's upsetting to say the least. But, I took note of this portion because you appear to think the Lord will give you materials blessings and health if you're "nice" to Him. Brother, that's not how it works, just pray and trust in Him, make every effort to follow Him. But we can in no way earn any sort of blessings like those, it's all out of love He provides us with what He wills. And I'll pray for you, I do hope you get closer to Him and find relief from all of this!
I don't understand your statement "you appear to think the Lord will give you materials blessings and health if you're "nice" to Him. "

I have no problem with anybody's advice. But please be careful that it is advice and not just you being judgemental. It's very easy to stand in one's own shoes and not understand the other persons heart or motivations.

I do however believe God blesses those in his flock who do right according to the scriptures and disciplines those in his flock who don't do what is right. I also understand we are under grace but most of that pertains to salvation.

I also believe Jesus has the power to heal me, but my stumbling block is why he hasn't even healed one problem I have, and the problems keep being piled on. The latest in the last couple months is chest & hip pain. Been to the Lord about it and got nothing. Been to the Doctor and got no diagnoses so no treatment. I can't stand, walk or sit without pain, laying down offers the most relief but I can't lay around the rest of my life. And that's just the latest in a long line of mounting discomfort. But I keep plugging along regardless.

I'm an imperfect person dealing with extraordinary circumstances, but I also understand that there are others dealing with more than myself and I have a great deal of compassion for them.


James 2:14 -26

14What use is it, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but he has no works? Can that faith save him? 15If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, 16and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,” and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? 17Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself.

18But someone may well say, “You have faith and I have works; show me your faith without the works, and I will show you my faith by my works.” 19You believe that God is one. You do well; the demons also believe, and shudder. 20But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless? 21Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up Isaac his son on the altar? 22You see that faith was working with his works, and as a result of the works, faith was perfected; 23and the Scripture was fulfilled which says, “AND ABRAHAM BELIEVED GOD, AND IT WAS RECKONED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS,” and he was called the friend of God. 24You see that a man is justified by works and not by faith alone. 25In the same way, was not Rahab the harlot also justified by works when she received the messengers and sent them out by another way? 26For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.