Anyone else in their 60 day wait of divorce????

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
R

RachelP03

Guest
#21
#21
rainacorn said:
Yeah, I'd say so.

But really my point was that when I see one thread from a barely 18 year old kid talking about getting married, I can't help but think of all of these sorts of threads talking about divorce... and they were married under similar circumstances- Got into a serious relationship super young and then couldn't hold it together. When I think about what I was like at 18 and then 28, I can see for my own self that there is just no way I could've held a marriage together. I became a totally different person. I grew up.

Now when I see someone in their 40s or 50s getting divorced, my heart really breaks for them. Chances are good that they knew what they were getting into and they worked hard at the relationship and for whatever reason it just couldn't work anymore. They had really given up a big chunk of their lives to it and it is hard to recover. There are also probably children involved.

My heart doesn't really break so much for people so young because I feel like someone should've talked them out of it or lectured them like crazy about the seriousness of marriage and divorce NOT BEING AN OPTION. Although it totally CAN happen, I think it is very unlikely that someone can have a committed long term working marriage with someone they met when they were 15 years old. It's naive and while we can point to it working out for our grandparent's generation, we should probably take a harder look at the circumstances surrounding it and figure out WHY it worked for them so we can learn HOW it can work for our generation (if it can).

A lot changes in those next 10 years and we keep seeing marriages that couldn't withstand the trial. So what are we left with? Loads and loads of people in their 20s that have already been married at least once doing backflips to justify their situation while overcrowding the dating pool.

Our calls to respect traditional marriage ring so very very hollow when we have such an extremely worldly divorce rate.

This isn't some rant against the OP or anything, but if you divorcees feel like you made some mistakes and are truly repentant for your situation, you should really get out there and start talking to these kids. They're walking into the same traps and making the same mistakes. You've been in those moccasins and could probably get through to those kids...either getting them to take it very very seriously or just hold off until they're really ready to be adults and make that kind of commitment.
Click to expand...

I admit I was young....I really will admit it... But my husband and I had gone thru so much more than most people do in their lifetime in those 10 years. My mom died when I was 16 and he was there and helped me.....I was faced with cancer at 19 and he was there for me.....we miscarried twins at seperate times and had an ectopic pregnancy and he was there.....we also had infertility problems for 2 years of our marriage. We dated for 6 years and waited till our wedding night and stayed true to each other. When we reached 20, we had everyone around us actually wanting us to get married, because we were such a strong couple. I really think we would of made it, if my husband never started working at the maximum high security prison we have. He lost every moral, belief and started cussing so bad, wanting to go to bars, and drinking, and that wasnt like him. While Im working at a small private school. That place changed my husband and I know we would still be together if it wasnt for that. My husband would preach to kids to wait till they were married....bought a bible for his gay uncle....,made Christian CDs for people and it all changed. I understand what you are saying, but we were the couple that people told us, they never had to worry about. People didnt even believe me and laughed at me when I told them we were going to get a divorce. We WERE that couple from back in our grandparents generation, but the devil is strong and got ahold of him and it sucks, but i did everything i could!!!!! I didnt want this....but I cant make someone be with me.
 
L

Lucy68

Senior Member
#22
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
22
0
#22
RachelP03 said:
I admit I was young....I really will admit it... But my husband and I had gone thru so much more than most people do in their lifetime in those 10 years. My mom died when I was 16 and he was there and helped me.....I was faced with cancer at 19 and he was there for me.....we miscarried twins at seperate times and had an ectopic pregnancy and he was there.....we also had infertility problems for 2 years of our marriage. We dated for 6 years and waited till our wedding night and stayed true to each other. When we reached 20, we had everyone around us actually wanting us to get married, because we were such a strong couple. I really think we would of made it, if my husband never started working at the maximum high security prison we have. He lost every moral, belief and started cussing so bad, wanting to go to bars, and drinking, and that wasnt like him. While Im working at a small private school. That place changed my husband and I know we would still be together if it wasnt for that. My husband would preach to kids to wait till they were married....bought a bible for his gay uncle....,made Christian CDs for people and it all changed. I understand what you are saying, but we were the couple that people told us, they never had to worry about. People didnt even believe me and laughed at me when I told them we were going to get a divorce. We WERE that couple from back in our grandparents generation, but the devil is strong and got ahold of him and it sucks, but i did everything i could!!!!! I didnt want this....but I cant make someone be with me.
Click to expand...


I'm so sorry you're going through this! I know it must be a very serious shock to see your husband change so drastically right before your eyes.

Wow, you've got a lot of strength!! Hang in there...the Lord will be with you and guide you through this.

I also pray that the Spirit will bring your ex-husband back into the fold. And also for a future, truly Godly husband for you, Sweetie. I know God is working on him right now...just for you :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.