Biblical Discipline (yes I mean spanking)

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L

lenna

Guest
#21
do we have a 'spanking' troll here? :LOL: :unsure:
 

SoulWeaver

Senior Member
Oct 25, 2014
4,889
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#24
ive helped many parents use it more effectively on older kids..
If you're using it on older kids, it just proves you didn't succeed at all in disciplining them so there's no effectiveness to be had... The only effect is undermining the relationship with the parent. The child might only temporarily be forced to do what you want but don't fool yourself that you've actually changed something. Especially if you're doing it often like you say, resorting to beating often is not only physical abuse, but also beatings simply become understood by the teen as taxes (inevitable), and lose any effect on behavior. The kid then choses to do what they want and pay his taxes when caught.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
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#26
OP doesnt know how to discipline her children except by spanking?
weird.

You know what Jesus did with his disciples. He washed their feet. He TAUGHT them. And the children he didnt spank, just said they were to come to him and forbid them not.

When anyone misbehaves, they arent spanked. They repent and get baptised. i dont recall John the baptist ever saying, well you were bad and couldnt sit still. Im gonna spank you. He was put in jail and head got cut off for sure....but that wasnt by the christians.

If you are going to drone on for more than an hour Im not going to sit still I would go and get popcorn and a coke and stop myself from falling asleep.

The rod and sthe staff, are they for spanking. well actually no the shepherd used them to GUIDE his flock. He doesnt beat them up with it.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,344
13,716
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#27
For anyone who is interested in this topic, I strongly recommend the book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend.

To put it simply, there is a biblically sound method of dealing with unwanted behaviour that is better than spanking, and which remains effective where corporal punishment doesn't.
 
L

lenna

Guest
#28
For anyone who is interested in this topic, I strongly recommend the book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend.

To put it simply, there is a biblically sound method of dealing with unwanted behaviour that is better than spanking, and which remains effective where corporal punishment doesn't.

that, is a very good book

spankings aside, a relationship 'primer'
 

Blain

The Word Weaver
Aug 28, 2012
19,212
2,547
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#29
hello, im a christian mother of two boys, and our faith plays a big part in our family life. The boys love church thankfully! was wondering if there are other like minded parents who still spank out there, or for those who dont how they do discipline?
Well spanking usually works on younger children but eventually it's affect wears off as they get older. However the other problem with spanking is that while there may be pain it doesn't last the lessons don't always stick but if there is something they particularly enjoy such t.v. being friends video games ect. taking that away for a period of time makes the message more clear and actually can do a better job of them not doing it again especially longer period of time without it.
When I was young my mom used to take my video games away I absolutely hated it she did it for a whole two months once that was torture for me and you can bet the lesson stuck, even it doesn't the first time extending it longer each time eventually makes you not want to risk it again
 

blueluna5

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2018
648
384
63
#30
hello, im a christian mother of two boys, and our faith plays a big part in our family life. The boys love church thankfully! was wondering if there are other like minded parents who still spank out there, or for those who dont how they do discipline?
It really depends on the child. Some children do really well with time out and some barely need disciplined at all. Other children only do well with spankings. It also depends if there's a male in the house, especially with boys. People don't like hearing that though.

A lot of my friends with 3-4 boys do use spanking. We're talking coaches, teachers, and Sunday school teachers. People would be surprised.

I use time out and logical consequences with my 2 year old son. However I did spank him 2 times for hitting the dog and hitting me mostly as a reflex. He never did it again so far. Honestly I say do what works. I'm a teacher and that makes me more strict bc I've seen average 11 year olds throwing desks. Or 14 year old boys hitting their mom.

Logical consequences means you break it you fix it. For my 2 year old if he draws on the wall, he cleans it up. He cleans up after himself. If he throws a toy after a warning, he loses it. If he's throwing an out of control tantrum it's nap time or bed time even if it's a bit early. However a tantrum here and there for a toddler is normal, though not for an older child. So knowing what is normal for each age is important. So is knowing any concerning behaviors such as adhd, autism, etc. That changes discipline a lot too. Every kid is completely different. What works for 1 may not work for another.

There always needs to be positive and negative consequences. Many parents today think only positive consequences can be done. This never works bc ultimately getting their way doing something rotten is worth it bc that item is more desirable than the reward. It's a slippery slope.

All that being said I hate disciplining. It sucks trying to raise decent human beings.
 
Jan 25, 2015
9,213
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#31
OP doesnt know how to discipline her children except by spanking?
weird.

You know what Jesus did with his disciples. He washed their feet. He TAUGHT them. And the children he didnt spank, just said they were to come to him and forbid them not.

When anyone misbehaves, they arent spanked. They repent and get baptised. i dont recall John the baptist ever saying, well you were bad and couldnt sit still. Im gonna spank you. He was put in jail and head got cut off for sure....but that wasnt by the christians.

If you are going to drone on for more than an hour Im not going to sit still I would go and get popcorn and a coke and stop myself from falling asleep.

The rod and sthe staff, are they for spanking. well actually no the shepherd used them to GUIDE his flock. He doesnt beat them up with it.
Wonder why Jesus cleaned the temple the way he did :unsure:?
 
B

Blackpowderduelist

Guest
#32
I'm not against spanking, however that is not the only was to discipline a child. Infact that is for rebellion and rebellious behavior. The Bible says train up a child. Spanking is not training. Training encompasses many things, including modeling proper method. Before spanking a child you need to ask have I actually taught them better? If you can't point to an actual teaching of the principal you have failed, and it may be you who needs the spanking. How many times have your children run over the lines that you did nothing except spout off at the mouth. Yep you trained them to talk back, and there by be disrespectful, and then disobedient and now you want to spank them for that. You have to start from the beginning. Teach proper boundaries in word and in action. Make the right thing easy and the wrong thing difficult. Them spank of they rebel against direct teaching.
 

PennEd

Senior Member
Apr 22, 2013
13,567
9,084
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#33
Even as a pro Spanker, for under 5 yr olds, I find it bizarre that the op’s favorite Biblical verse is the Proverbs spanking verse!

And then pushing for spanking teens, and actually teaching others about it, is MORE than a little bizarre.
 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
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#34
Even as a pro Spanker, for under 5 yr olds, I find it bizarre that the op’s favorite Biblical verse is the Proverbs spanking verse!

And then pushing for spanking teens, and actually teaching others about it, is MORE than a little bizarre.
I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure sometimes people role play as militant Christian spankers in order to propagate a stereotype.

For example, now anyone who searches "how to discipline your child from a Biblical perspective" might actually end up reading this thread.

If they don't read past the first several replies they may wrongly assume that Christians promote no other forms of discipline aside from spanking for all age groups regardless of what the child's offense is.

See what is happening? It's misinformation designed to repulse people toward the Bible and Christianity.

Real Biblical discipline is is wisdom and truth. Teach your children wisdom and truth of the Bible and their path will be straight.
 
3

3angelsmsg

Guest
#35
Spanking, the use of force and methods to control will only lead to the child becoming rebellious. Parents provoke their children to rebel. Many think that child of 5 - 12 are too young to be given liberty. How does God deal with us. He never force us or try control us. Our archenemy likes to force and manupalite humans to do what he wants them to do. Now we have to follow in the footsteps of our heavenly Father. And mommies and daddys can learn from how God deals with sin. In all of our lives, it is the problem of sin that needs to be solved. Parents are going about the wrong way of discipling their children. We always look to the symptom and not the cause(root). By spanking the child, you are trying to change the behavior of the child outwardly but what is more important that needs to be changed. The outward behavior or the inner life of the heart. The right way of disciplining a child would be to let the child see the error in their heart that needs to be destroyed. Moms have the most sacred work to educate the little ones. And we know moms loves their children very much and I am sure they are doing their best. The little ones are still very much connected together with mommy. Mom can sit with the baby or child at the end of every day and evaluate with the child their actions. Moms should study the actions of their babies and make notes. It is very good when children misbehave because then you can see the error is still in their heart. But when the child are doing everything right. It becomes difficult to read in the child's heart. That's why you also need to test your child what you taught them. Mom can ask Tom, what you did today to Anna. When you hit Anna was it right? What made you do that? And you allow the child to open his heart to see what are the thoughts that made the child to act the way he or she did. And by doing this, the child will see that something inside of him or her is wrong and that needs to be changed and destroyed. And then the child will recognise that my parents are trying to help. We ought to reason with eachother and not try to rule over others.
 
Feb 28, 2016
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#36
I can't even recall how many times I have heard over the years, others telling how 'they became 'who the are today',
(((because their parents cared enough about them to (((spank/correct them in LOVE, and NEVER in ANGER)))...
BUT, JUST LOOK!!! at our youths behavior in the streets of AMERICA TODAY!!!
(((WHAT HAPPENED???)))
when we watch the vids of today, it is obvious that they are in total 'fear' concerning disciplining their children,
(((for FEAR of going to jail)))...
ISA. 3:12.
As for My people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O My people,
they which lead you cause you to err, and destroy the way of your paths.

if some believe that "JESUS" is against 'corporal punishment', then we suggest that you learn
how to apply the Holy Scriptures to 'yourselves', and not how you 'think' they apply as opposed to His Way,
or the 'ways' of our present evil-world'...
PRO. 13:24.
He that spares his rod (((hates))) his son: but he that LOVES him 'chastens him betimes'.
as it is written;
HEB. 12:6.
(((For whom The Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives))).

at some point in your lives, especially as you age', in this age, try and find/be real in your assessment
of your 'behaviours' and KNOW, that God's Rules apply to you, every day of your life' -
(this IS your obligation to your Saviour!!!)
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,605
1,317
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#37
ive helped many parents use it more effectively on older kids..
You lack wisdom.
I have 5 kids, mostly grown... I have learnt by my mistakes with much regret...
There is a way that seems right to man...
The Word tells us if we do not have love we have nothing; don’t be legalistic about spanking thinking you are obeying God... If we ask for wisdom He will give it. We are told to walk humbly with Him... to live our children... God never gives us what we deserve; He is kind and tender-hearted... I wish I could go back 25 years and be kinder and more tender-hearted to my kids instead of trying too hard to be a ‘Godly mother‘... Please listen to the people posting on here they have a lot of wisdom to offer.
 

Hjulle51

New member
Nov 23, 2018
23
11
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#38
hello, im a christian mother of two boys, and our faith plays a big part in our family life. The boys love church thankfully! was wondering if there are other like minded parents who still spank out there, or for those who dont how they do discipline?
Have worked for hundreds of years
 

Hjulle51

New member
Nov 23, 2018
23
11
3
#39
I think all children need strict boundaries and spanked if they cross that line but I'm very old fashioned
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,605
1,317
113
#40
I think all children need strict boundaries and spanked if they cross that line but I'm very old fashioned
There is a lot of abuse happening under the guise of ‘Biblical discipline’ and I know a lot of Christian families that have been very damaged and split up. There is not enough good teaching on this subject, and too much legalism and harshness in Christian families. They don’t realise that in their best efforts they are causing long- term damage which they will one day deeply regret.

God is not harsh with us, He is kind, tender-hearted, full of mercy, patient, kind, understanding... otherwise none of us would even be here.