can you guys post something funny please?

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oldethennew

Senior Member
Feb 28, 2016
8,906
1,506
113
#22
very funny 'mail', have done this 'several times', especially at the 'barn', where
spiders grow exceptionally 'large', it takes a lot of courage to go after them and
do what you have to do!!!
:)
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#23
I'm careful about humor these days, as I have a serious calling, but, I did laugh at Mailmandan's list of 10--
and the "cat scan..."
and the sign, "live your life so folks won't have to lie at your funeral"
and all the efforts to ease tension here with humor...

It's not always easy to see what is mature humor or not, or fitting to be used for a Christian purpose. It's all too easy to end up mocking God and dishonoring the dire seriousness of the state of the world. But, occasionally, I believe humor is sent by God, not to entertain, but to relieve stress or convey a serious message or deflect serious discipline (cushion the impact of deserved discipline);

But, for saved Christians, in good standing with God, Jesus does say to be lively in fellowship, which he referred to as "salt," seasoning fellowship with upbeat motivation, that some leaders have a gift for. But, the Apostles were very human, even though they had a very, deadly serious mission in life-- life and death, heaven and hell. They likely found a few lighter moments to ease the stress and suffering. But, when they wrote-- it was deadly serious.

Personally this needed to be said, since in the past, I was way off target at times with humor.
But the right words from a friend or family or church member or in here, real-life stuff, can really make your day and can be a God-send, and relieve stress for a whole day.
In the chat rooms, we have had some crazy times of just insanity chatting-- but, usually (hopefully) it was to make a serious point.

This was a real-life situation: It sounded like angelic serious advice with just a hint of serious, but, lighter teaching.
I was very stressed out, and, finally said out loud one day--
"But I KNOW God is still WINNING!!"
I thought I heard in my mind--a sort of frustrated, but patient reply meant to inspire--
I thought I heard:
"KNOCK ON WOOD!!"

The message being that of course God is still winning. And it helped that day.

A missionary with a lot of zeal, and that's a great thing! Was knocking on doors at 6:00 AM and waking up people with the Gospel message. That's a great way to reach people too if you are brave enough. The tired person slowly shuffles to the door after 10 minutes of non-stop knocking, half-asleep in his house robe, and faces the young man shouting at him:
"ARE YOU GOING TO HEAVEN WHEN YOU DIE?!!" The tired man, finally waking up, rubbing his eyes just says:
"I don't know..."
"Are you gonna to be there?"


A Bumper-sticker spotted on a police-chief's squad car:
"Yes, I do own the whole road."


mosquito message.jpg

***This image may be copyrighted, and is used here only as a demo... cat-watching-mice-cartoon_u-l-pwjcd50 - Copy.jpg
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#24
I forgot to put under the comic caption of the cat and mice: that is a "harry Bliss" comic, copyrighted to harrybliss.com and used only as a demo--
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#25
A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:
Man: What's the problem officer?
Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.
Man: No sir, I was going 65.
Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80.
(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.
Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!
Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.
(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.
Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.
Wife: Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt.
Man: Shut your mouth, woman!
Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way?
Wife: No, only when he's drunk.
you got me again mail man dan---
have to do the disclaimer though about drinking and driving being very serious, but this is just a sketch--

this reminds me of the time when i was pulled over by a police officer for a tail light being out. He said, "did you know your tail light was out?" I looked down at the front of his car and one of the head lights was out, and I said, "no, did you know your headlight was out?" He just said, "have a good evening, sir..."

Another time, I missed the construction reduced speed zone and passed the police car going 75 MPH. He stopped me obviously, and I said I didn't see the new zone. He just said, "well, when you pass the police car going 75 MPH, that should be a clue." He was cool about it, because he believed it was an honest mistake and just gave me a warning.
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#26
This is copyrighted to "Pearls Before Swine" Comics and used here as a demo only:
copyright to Pearls Before Swine comic.jpg
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#27
Copyrighted to Stephan Pastis, "Pearls Before Swine" used here for demo only:

pearls before swine.jpg
 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#28
Copyrighted to Stephan Pastis "Pearls Before Swine" comics; used for demo only--

 

HeraldtheNews

Well-known member
Apr 26, 2012
1,212
243
63
61
#29
Copyrighted to Stephan Pastis "Pearls Before Swine," comics; used for demo only--

 
T

theanointedsinner

Guest
#35
How does Mr. Roger's horse greet their neighbor?
hi neiiigh-bor

what does police siren sound like?
real-real-real

what would a conversation between atheist and a solipsism-person be like?
Atheist would say, "God doesn't exist", and a solipsism-person would reply "so does reality" (solipsist doesn't believe that there's a reality outside their mind)
 

YHello

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2018
507
254
63
#36
I'm careful about humor these days, as I have a serious calling, but, I did laugh at Mailmandan's list of 10--
and the "cat scan..."
and the sign, "live your life so folks won't have to lie at your funeral"
and all the efforts to ease tension here with humor...

It's not always easy to see what is mature humor or not, or fitting to be used for a Christian purpose. It's all too easy to end up mocking God and dishonoring the dire seriousness of the state of the world. But, occasionally, I believe humor is sent by God, not to entertain, but to relieve stress or convey a serious message or deflect serious discipline (cushion the impact of deserved discipline);

But, for saved Christians, in good standing with God, Jesus does say to be lively in fellowship, which he referred to as "salt," seasoning fellowship with upbeat motivation, that some leaders have a gift for. But, the Apostles were very human, even though they had a very, deadly serious mission in life-- life and death, heaven and hell. They likely found a few lighter moments to ease the stress and suffering. But, when they wrote-- it was deadly serious.

Personally this needed to be said, since in the past, I was way off target at times with humor.
But the right words from a friend or family or church member or in here, real-life stuff, can really make your day and can be a God-send, and relieve stress for a whole day.
In the chat rooms, we have had some crazy times of just insanity chatting-- but, usually (hopefully) it was to make a serious point.

This was a real-life situation: It sounded like angelic serious advice with just a hint of serious, but, lighter teaching.
I was very stressed out, and, finally said out loud one day--
"But I KNOW God is still WINNING!!"
I thought I heard in my mind--a sort of frustrated, but patient reply meant to inspire--
I thought I heard:
"KNOCK ON WOOD!!"

The message being that of course God is still winning. And it helped that day.

A missionary with a lot of zeal, and that's a great thing! Was knocking on doors at 6:00 AM and waking up people with the Gospel message. That's a great way to reach people too if you are brave enough. The tired person slowly shuffles to the door after 10 minutes of non-stop knocking, half-asleep in his house robe, and faces the young man shouting at him:
"ARE YOU GOING TO HEAVEN WHEN YOU DIE?!!" The tired man, finally waking up, rubbing his eyes just says:
"I don't know..."
"Are you gonna to be there?"


A Bumper-sticker spotted on a police-chief's squad car:
"Yes, I do own the whole road."


View attachment 189062

***This image may be copyrighted, and is used here only as a demo... View attachment 189064
Mosquitoes are always biting me so it would be nice for them to start singing for a change :LOL:
 
T

theanointedsinner

Guest
#38
what's the difference between an evolutionist and a work-salvationist?
one believes in millions of years, while the other believes that a sheep can become a goat within a lifetime (misinterpreting "leaving the 99")
 
T

theanointedsinner

Guest
#39
what would Matthew 7:13-14 be like in an opposite world like "the bizarro world" from superman?

for wide is life and narrow is death

but then again, the afterlife is opposite, so they cancels out

now where was I going with this? :unsure: