How is loneliness while single different from loneliness in marriage?

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Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
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I just don't "experience different emotions" or whatever.
Life is one constant going from what He wants me to do, to the next what He wants me to do, there is no room for whatever this lack of His love, joy, peace, etc.
I can't be the only one who is enjoying this walk with Him, there are several here who have commented in the affirmative. The focus and fight in this thread to maintain "being lonely" is in itself an example of not keeping the mind "stayed on Him".
Hence the need to take a break and return to fellowship with Him.
best wishes
The fact that you are saying that you don't experience certain types of emotions doesn't mean that you don't have the capacity to experience them if certain kind of life experiences happened around you.
I can easily say I don't experience depression..but it doesn't mean i don't have the capacity to feel depressed if certain very unfortunate life situations occured in my life.
Often our life experiences dictate our general sense of self..(mood..mental health..sense if well being ect)yet in christ we have a totally different dynamic which can supercede such things regardless of what life throws at us.
Yet God doesn't switch off our capacity to feel and think..some emotions lead to positive things...certain life experiences and emotions can cause us to seek him more earnestly...grow closer to him...experience his loving kindness via answered prayer ect.
Feeling lonely isnt always a reflection of a mind not stayed on him..one can be completely focused in him as our lord yet still experience everyday emotions as a reaction of various life alterations.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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God puts the lonely in families...
I think the difference is the single person is refereshed by solitude but the married person is refreshed by having company.

The christian is not ever lonely because they always have church family, and God is only a prayer away.
Just because one is single, doesnt necessarily mean one lives alone. A lot of singles live with their families, or in groups i.e flatting situations, co-housing etc.

some married couples actually choose to live alone. They live apart from everyone else, or have several homes where one lives away from the other, or they are empty nesters having kicked out all their children. Or they isolate themselves within their marriage because they literally dont see anyone else except their spouse.
 

shittim

Senior Member
Dec 16, 2016
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The fact that you are saying that you don't experience certain types of emotions doesn't mean that you don't have the capacity to experience them if certain kind of life experiences happened around you.
I can easily say I don't experience depression..but it doesn't mean i don't have the capacity to feel depressed if certain very unfortunate life situations occured in my life.
Often our life experiences dictate our general sense of self..(mood..mental health..sense if well being ect)yet in christ we have a totally different dynamic which can supercede such things regardless of what life throws at us.
Yet God doesn't switch off our capacity to feel and think..some emotions lead to positive things...certain life experiences and emotions can cause us to seek him more earnestly...grow closer to him...experience his loving kindness via answered prayer ect.
Feeling lonely isnt always a reflection of a mind not stayed on him..one can be completely focused in him as our lord yet still experience everyday emotions as a reaction of various life alterations.
That is foreign to me as I look at the world through His lens.
best wishes
 

Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
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That is foreign to me as I look at the world through His lens.
best wishes
well you're obviously looking through the wrong lens then which most certainly can't be his one then.
Tunnel vision comes to mind
All the best
 

Tararose

Well-known member
Sep 30, 2020
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Uk
www.101christiansocialnetwork.com
well you're obviously looking through the wrong lens then which most certainly can't be his one then.
Tunnel vision comes to mind
All the best
That is foreign to me as I look at the world through His lens.
best wishes

Jesus made a whip and emptied the temple courts and overturned tables because He was content and never moved with negative emotions?

Jesus wept over Lazerous - wept over Jerusalem - sweat drops of blood -‘cried out not my will - cried out father father why have you forsaken me - because Hr was not moved by human negative emotion?

Paul spoke of being content in hunger and poverty - as well as being well fed and having plenty.

It was a reference to accepting and being ok with whatever level of provision came to him, which the chapter carrys on to clarify.

We are told to “consider“ it all joy - Why ? Because it is obviously and clearly not actually all joy For any believer on planet earth.

But, like Christ who set His face like a flint for the joy that was set before Him... the joy to come, we press on through them all with Him helping us.

Contentment in the context has nothing to do with a constant robotic unmoved, or permanent state of medicated-like zombie calm, tranquility or lack of passionate relative emotions or deep troubling distress.

This was NOT Jesus’ experience, and we are not greater than, nor have we achieved a higher state of human existence than our master Christ had in human form on this Earth.[/QUOTE]
 

1ofthem

Senior Member
Mar 30, 2016
3,400
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Jesus made a whip and emptied the temple courts and overturned tables because He was content and never moved with negative emotions?

Jesus wept over Lazerous - wept over Jerusalem - sweat drops of blood -‘cried out not my will - cried out father father why have you forsaken me - because Hr was not moved by human negative emotion?

Paul spoke of being content in hunger and poverty - as well as being well fed and having plenty.

It was a reference to accepting and being ok with whatever level of provision came to him, which the chapter carrys on to clarify.

We are told to “consider“ it all joy - Why ? Because it is obviously and clearly not actually all joy For any believer on planet earth.

But, like Christ who set His face like a flint for the joy that was set before Him... the joy to come, we press on through them all with Him helping us.

Contentment in the context has nothing to do with a constant robotic unmoved, or permanent state of medicated-like zombie calm, tranquility or lack of passionate relative emotions or deep troubling distress.

This was NOT Jesus’ experience, and we are not greater than, nor have we achieved a higher state of human existence than our master Christ had in human form on this Earth.
Amen...It doesn't get any clearer than that. Your post is spot on. I can't imagine how anyone couldn't understand these concepts and really there is no way of debating anything that you have posted. It is all scriptural and spiritual truth.
 

shittim

Senior Member
Dec 16, 2016
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Jesus made a whip and emptied the temple courts and overturned tables because He was content and never moved with negative emotions?

Jesus wept over Lazerous - wept over Jerusalem - sweat drops of blood -‘cried out not my will - cried out father father why have you forsaken me - because Hr was not moved by human negative emotion?

Paul spoke of being content in hunger and poverty - as well as being well fed and having plenty.

It was a reference to accepting and being ok with whatever level of provision came to him, which the chapter carrys on to clarify.

We are told to “consider“ it all joy - Why ? Because it is obviously and clearly not actually all joy For any believer on planet earth.

But, like Christ who set His face like a flint for the joy that was set before Him... the joy to come, we press on through them all with Him helping us.

Contentment in the context has nothing to do with a constant robotic unmoved, or permanent state of medicated-like zombie calm, tranquility or lack of passionate relative emotions or deep troubling distress.

This was NOT Jesus’ experience, and we are not greater than, nor have we achieved a higher state of human existence than our master Christ had in human form on this Earth.
[/QUOTE]
then please enjoy your lack of joy.
goodbye
 

Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
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then please enjoy your lack of joy.
goodbye[/QUOTE]
My goodness...where do people like you get your mindset from..it just astounds me..🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️
You are blind and don't even realise that you cannot see.🤦🏼‍♂️
 
B

Blackpowderduelist

Guest
then please enjoy your lack of joy.
goodbye
My goodness...where do people like you get your mindset from..it just astounds me..🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️
You are blind and don't even realise that you cannot see.🤦🏼‍♂️[/QUOTE]
It's evil self-righteousness.
 

GiveThanks

God Will Make A Way
Dec 6, 2020
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Its plain to see that shittim is lonely and unhappy. The only fun he knows is to insult others. He is over 70 yet he talks immature. He also lacks spiritual maturity.
 

Runningman

Well-known member
Mar 4, 2020
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I'm not sure that single people are supposed to or have to feel lonely. Some are and some aren't. Some people don't get married and don't want to get married. in Matthew 19 when Jesus was talking about marriage and divorce...Jesus disciples said if this is be so then it is good not to be married. Jesus answered and said that all men can't receive this saying except to whom it is given.

So seems like it is not for some folks to get married, and I don't think that would mean that they would have to be or supposed to feel lonely.
I agree with that. If I had to nail it down to one thing that distinguishes a married couple from people who are single is just sexual relationship.
 
B

Blackpowderduelist

Guest
Its plain to see that shittim is lonely and unhappy. The only fun he knows is to insult others. He is over 70 yet he talks immature. He also lacks spiritual maturity.
He is part of the Pentecostal probably oneness and is disconnected from reality. They teach you to not be honest about your situation, and feelings because you are claiming and therefore calling into existence the negative feelings or conditions. It really is mysticism.
 
B

Blackpowderduelist

Guest
then please enjoy your lack of joy.
goodbye
My goodness...where do people like you get your mindset from..it just astounds me..🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️
You are blind and don't even realise that you cannot see.🤦🏼‍♂️[/QUOTE]
It's mysticism, plain and simple. Speak into truth how you want things to be.
 
B

Blackpowderduelist

Guest
I agree with that. If I had to nail it down to one thing that distinguishes a married couple from people who are single is just sexual relationship.
There is more to it than that. Even though that is a big part at first.
 
Mar 12, 2021
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We all know that not all singles and not married couples are lonely. However, people in both groups admit to being lonely. How is being lonely while single different from being lonely while married? Are they different or equally terrible? While everyone's views are welcome, I believe only people who have been both single (living alone) for an extended time and have been in long-term relationships/marriages can offer wise words on this topic.
They are equal, in all aspects; I been married and lonely. And been single for a long time. The secret is we need to have an angel in our lives, whether we are married or not. We are not going to find a perfect person. So that person is not going to be able to fully love us. We need something to complete us which is the Spirit of Love. We each need to ask Wisdom, which is a spirit, to grant us our individual Spirit of Love, angel. The Bible tells us to search for Wisdom, she is treasures. We need to have a relationship with our Spirit of Love. We also need a big stuffed animal, a photo of someone looking like they are paying attention, substitute affection and .... That is a lot to work on. The Spirit of Love cures loneliness and cheating. We can write with (get responses) and to the Spirit of Love, God and Wisdom.
 

Lafftur

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2017
6,038
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As a Christian, being single feeling loneliness is full of hopeFULness for the future. Whereas being married and feeling loneliness is full of hopeLESSness for the future because the marriage commitment is death till we part.

However, if there is adultery in the marriage relationship and you feel loneliness then you can divorce and find another partner for the future.

My advice however is stay single and not remarry because Jesus Christ can fulfill and satisfy your loneliness.

In heaven there is no male or female and no giving in marriage, therefore, there is no reason to remarry if you are satisfied in Christ alone.
 

RosePetal1

New member
Apr 5, 2021
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Loneliness when you’re single is easier to handle.. there is hope that you’ll eventually meet someone. When you’re married and lonely... it feels like you’re trapped... sadly.
 

TheIndianGirl

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Nov 22, 2019
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My observations are that there is some sort of threshold where married people are fine with/have accepted being "lonely" as they still would prefer being married rather than being single. I believe many lonely married people would rather be lonely married than lonely single. For example, a lot of unhappy married people still brag about being married and put down singles.
 

TheIndianGirl

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Nov 22, 2019
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I think this is why some women marry a guy they shouldn't marry despite some major red flags, especially as they get older, because for whatever reason, they are afraid being single and alone is worse.
 

Encouragement

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Aug 25, 2020
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Loneliness when you’re single is easier to handle.. there is hope that you’ll eventually meet someone. When you’re married and lonely... it feels like you’re trapped... sadly.
Yes most definitely..when you are single the loneliness you experience is a like mourning over the absence of having a companion where you would have assess to emotional,physological,physical and even spiritual Intimacy...
Whereas the loneliness with a marriage is created within the dynamic of the "actual" marital relationship..This can be harder because the loneliness has developed through the interaction with another person whereas when you single the loneliness is created because nobody is there.
Being married subconciously naturally increases our expectations for things to be fruitful yet at the same time creates a degree of vulnerability because there can be expectations we have relating to our spouse that we have which we hope will be meet by them in one way or another with Gods help.