how to witness to a closed-minded husband; our marriage depends on it

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
K

Kyra

Guest
#21
#21
I don't know if you are a book person, but Lee Strobel (an atheist turned christian- who is now a heavy hitting apologist ) wrote a book called Surviving a Spiritual Mismatch in Marriage. His wife is the co-author.

Basically his wife was a christian first and their marriage became really rocky when she "got saved". Eventually the Lord won him over. They have a pretty amazing story and if the book is anything like their talks, it would be worth the read.


 
F

Forgiven83

Guest
#22
#22
ambergood1 said:
I am going through some very difficult situations right now and I guess I just need some prayer and support.

I am 27 years old. Ten years ago, during a time when I had detoured away from my walk with the Lord, I met my now husband. Since I wasn't walking closely with the Lord, it wasn't a topic we talked about much or were really concerned with. After it was too late, I learned that he basically is an atheist. (He says he's not an atheist, but if you ask him if he believes in God, he'll tell you no and he refuses to step foot in a church for any reason) Well, now, for about 2 years, our relationship has been struggling severely.

I have started going through The Love Dare, the companion book to the movie Fireproof. During the Dare, I have realized that I need to renew my relationship with the Lord before I have a chance of renewing my relationship with my husband. I'm only into the first couple of days of this renewed commitment so I'm still walking very unsteadily.(pretty much "toddling like a 1-year old")

I also know that my husband is also going to have to open up his heart and come to Christ so we can be the family I know we could be. My husband is very touchy about the subject and becomes very angry and rude if anyone tries to witness to him in any way. He even avoids associating with anyone that he knows is going to bring the matter up in any way.

I feel that the Lord is calling me to bear witness to my husband, but I struggle with how to witness to him. He's the type, if you try to shove it down his throat, he will walk away and never look back at you, and I can't take that risk. We have a beautiful 2.5 year old daughter and I feel she needs us to stay a family and I do still LOVE my husband and want us to stay a family for eternity.

One challenge I face is the fear that if I start to walk close to the Lord, my husband will walk out on me. Of course, this is the last thing I want to happen.

Does anyone have any suggestions of how to witness to my husband without pushing him away?
Click to expand...

Wow wow wow I have SOOOO been where you are sweetie!!! I became a Christian six months after my husband and I were married and two years before he finally did also and they were by far the most stressful years of my life. My husband wanted NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING religious and I mean that in the most vehment sense of the word and knowing him as I did and do, I knew that it would take nothing short of a MIRACLE to change his mind...once he sets his mind to something thats it, so I knew there was no way that I could do it by myself. First of all, I recruited my pastor, who as it turned out was totally put on this earth to befriend my husband, and I prayed...and prayed....and prayed....and got NOTHING...nada....zip for my efforts. My hearts desire was to see him saved, and I didnt think that would ever happen! Crying out to God, i fell on my knees one day and asked God what I could do to make that happen,....and the response I got was "love him". Needless to say that made me mad....Love him?? I already love him!!!!! What the heck kinda help is that??? LOL But slowly over time I realised that love was what was going to make the difference.....I didnt try to "convert" him...I didnt speak of Jesus to him hardly at all....but he saw my enthusiasm for church, and my pastor who was INSTRUMENTAL in hubbie's salvation showed my husband pure unaltered love...and in the end, my husband realised that we werent "out to get him" that we just wanted to love him and over a long period of time he responded.

I know, this is probably as helpful to you as it seemed to me at the time. What I'm blundering on to say is that we as wives have a mandate.....to love our husbands and to minister to them in whatever way they need. I found the minute I STOPPED trying to talk to my husband about God was the minute he started asking questions...a LOTTTT of questions, so be ready to answer, or be ready to refer him on to someone who can. Be diligent and enthusiastic, and never ever give up praying for him. And most of all, look after yourself and your relationship with God, because you cannot give away what you don't already have. And if you need someone to talk to, feel free to message me on here any old time. Like I said, I've been there, and I absolutely feel your pain and your desire to share that part of your life with him. He's very blessed to have you in his life, even if he doesnt know it yet!!!! :D
 
L

LaQuoi

Guest
#23
#23
I'm new to here but I have a situation. I'm a christian and I've not been where I need to be but I'm working on it. My wife of 10 years has told me she wants a divorce. She says she will not change her mind. I've have begun the process of letting go even-though I don't want to. We have 3 children I'm a truck driver so I'm not at home that much anymore. It seems like when I start o pull away she starts to pull closer. She says this is not about a man. I don't know what to belive right now I've been praying and searching god. I don't know where to read in the scripture but I don't want to fight her anymore either. I'm always the one left in tears and feeling alone and betrayed. I work hard for my family but yet she says I don't make her happy anymore and what would make her happy is not being married to me.

I hate being like this and I'm tired of it all. She did this to me once before about 5 years ago. She had pushed me so far away that I had started to see someone else. I confessed this to her and told her then and there if she wanted a real reason to leave me now she had one. But yet she didn't she said that she wanted to work on it....and now after she starts going to these different single sites it has all started up again. I love her deeply and I'm weak right now. But it's like when I start get closed off and am about to try to get myself in a place in my heart to where I'll be prepared for her leaving me she starts calling me. Even after she said that one of the issues was me calling too much...

I want to be married to her I want to be a father to my children. But I have feelings to. Everything is her choice and I know that God can't take her free will. I understand these things well. It is just right now I don't know what to do. I keep praying and keep reading but deep down I'm starting to feel dead inside...I think that sometimes I wish I were dead. I'm not suicidal or none of that...it is just the way I feel right now...and on top of it all I'm alone out here on the road. I know Jesus is with me, but it's different. I hope you all understand what I'm saying here because I have nowhere else to turn.

Thanks for Listening
James
 
You must log in or register to reply here.