I have read And reread scripture pertaining to divorce but wonder sometimes if we are bound to live by the law or depend on Gods grace and forgiveness in certain. Situations.
In that moment of wonderment were you humbly looking up to see Gods answers about your despair or looking outwardly to reasoning on the issue? And by the way, being real with God is necessary, you are hurt and confused, and angry, and feelings are running a coarse of action, God doesn't want you to flower that up. Ask in just such a real way in describing your plight.. God wants to answer your questions. He wants to direct you thru the Holy Spirit, but owes you nothing in way of your unwillingness to submit to His ways over a better Logical way. The realness works both ways, this is a relationship after all. You are the branch He is Divine, or something like that smile.
You have been thru a lot from what you said. But God knows all about it. And you know of His character and desire for you right? And you believe He is capable and willing to Help you right? And the marriage He wants you to honor and He as well, for He says, What he has put together let no man put asunder. I trust you have given your concerns to God. But have you given your faithfulness to God in those concerns? And then have you faithfully tapped out your seeking after His ways and resources in it? Not by specific issues alone but from a heart base change in both parties. The supernatural redirection of both parties? Are you yourself pliable to God? Or Have you come to step aside from Him and debate the value of Him in the specifics? This deflates Gods power in you. And gives no cause for Him to turn toward you.
You want God? God is all and in all, He has allowed a crisis in front of you to have you surrender your right to yourself in reasoning and fall at His mercy. This will turn His head and resources toward you. God is faithful to all, and He may work in your marriage in anyway He deems fit regardless of your faithfulness to HIm. But God says if you remain in me and my Word remains in you ask whatever you wish and it will be given. You know God wants your marriage to work, the 'will' of both of you is a player too, but if you are looking to save your marriage do it with all your strength, without doubt in God.
To ask for the answer, are you also ready to be the answer as well? I sense you understand God will require obedience, but you are debating the need vs. the cost to you. Walk thru the cost in it with God, commit to traveling thru it. and be real about your heart over it. God will not let you fall. He will empower as you take yourself out and put God before you. Maybe you want out of the marriage,maybe you are mad at God, maybe you don't trust God completely...simply..... Tell God that , and make up your mind to surrender to Him all of it....This is where you are still...He will explain His point of view from that real starting point, He will provide answers in His timing as well.. Just obey Him as He describes His point of view. All things work out for good who love the Lord. If you love me you will obey my commandments.The Word is alive thru the Holy Spirit have your soul know His Spirit well. Read sure, but pray! Pray! Pray! again with every ounce of strength in you. God bless you but if you feel the marriage is over anyway, let God reconsider that in you He is that powerful. He can make love real again not pretentious.
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