Men,Do You Appreciate Your Wives?!

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kaylagrl

Senior Member
Oct 18, 2014
12,205
337
83
#41
How about an opinion, Kayla? I can't imagine a reason not to give one, now. You've seen different points of view. They've all been enlightening in some way.

You sure dont forget! lol Ok here goes....I think he is speaking mainly to young men. I do see a flippant attitude with some young men these days about marriage and how they respect their wives. I dont like to generalize because you can never paint people with the same brush.But I just think that with the way the world is now days there is just not respect for wives like there once was.I dont mean that in a feminist way either,I mean before feminism ever came along. There was a day when to be a married woman was respected by everyone.You called someone Mrs. whomever. I wonder if young people in general understand the seriousness of marriage.We have so many movies based on the "perfect" romance. But like Sis.Angela said, love is a whole lot deeper.My uncle nursed my aunt who died of cancer,she was 43 yrs old.

Marriage is certainly both giving 100% But sometimes women are taken for granted. I dont have children but I was with my sister when she had both of her children. Just to watch a pain a woman goes through having a child. I think the Duck Dynasty star is talking to the younger generation. Respect your wife,dont take her for granted. She goes through a lot to keep her family happy and healthy. Just remember,you get paid to do your job,she doesnt! While Im writing this my wonderful husband is in the kitchen making us supper. So by no means am I putting men down. Sometimes we need to be reminded to appreciate the unsung heroes. Wives do a lot with no word of complaint. Thats my take on what was said.Thanks for all the replies,I enjoyed reading them all!
 

nw2u

Senior Member
Jun 9, 2012
894
6
0
#42
You sure dont forget! lol Ok here goes....I think he is speaking mainly to young men. I do see a flippant attitude with some young men these days about marriage and how they respect their wives. I dont like to generalize because you can never paint people with the same brush.But I just think that with the way the world is now days there is just not respect for wives like there once was.I dont mean that in a feminist way either,I mean before feminism ever came along. There was a day when to be a married woman was respected by everyone.You called someone Mrs. whomever. I wonder if young people in general understand the seriousness of marriage.We have so many movies based on the "perfect" romance. But like Sis.Angela said, love is a whole lot deeper.My uncle nursed my aunt who died of cancer,she was 43 yrs old.

Marriage is certainly both giving 100% But sometimes women are taken for granted. I dont have children but I was with my sister when she had both of her children. Just to watch a pain a woman goes through having a child. I think the Duck Dynasty star is talking to the younger generation. Respect your wife,dont take her for granted. She goes through a lot to keep her family happy and healthy. Just remember,you get paid to do your job,she doesnt! While Im writing this my wonderful husband is in the kitchen making us supper. So by no means am I putting men down. Sometimes we need to be reminded to appreciate the unsung heroes. Wives do a lot with no word of complaint. Thats my take on what was said.Thanks for all the replies,I enjoyed reading them all!
Thank you!

I was at the birth of both of my children. I understand what that looks like and don't wish it on anyone. It is what women have gone through since "forever", or the fall of man in the garden. I actually think there is no reason for men to be there, other than to guilt them into respecting their wives. The trouble is, if they didn't respect them before the birth, or didn't really deeply desire children, seeing all that pain won't change most of them. It's a choice to get pregnant today. It isn't a given, unless you are not using any kind of birth control for sex. Both spouses have a responsibility to decide what is best for them.

Some religions prohibit most forms of birth control. Some men have vasectomies and thereby take responsibility for themselves. The latter is usually done by men who believe they are too old to raise children, but will not be celibate within or outside of marriage. Some can't afford children. I think it is a sin to bring children into the world when you know you can't raise them in a reasonably healthy and happy home. You see, it's about what's best for the children, not the parents. Men and women can be married and not have children. I don't see anything wrong with that. It's not a sin to decide you are not ready, willing, or able to have them.

I suppose that is a modern take on marriage. I can remember mum and dad telling me that the only reason to get married was to have children. Otherwise, don't get married. The caveat was to stay celibate. That's tough and I know many here are celibate, and many wish they could be, but are covered by the blood when they sin and confess. I'm not judging. I'm just stating a fact.

I do see a flippant attitude with some young men these days about marriage and how they respect their wives.
I think this is true in some cases. I think children learn to respect women at home. What their parents teach them is what they live. That can change due to what they experience in the world outside their homes by experiencing how others treat women, their wives and their mothers.

There was a day when to be a married woman was respected by everyone.You called someone Mrs. whomever. I wonder if young people in general understand the seriousness of marriage.
I remember calling an older woman "Mrs." when I was a child. As I became an adult, this type of thing waned. I remember some women asking to be called "Ms.". For me, that was the start of not using a salutary prefix. I felt like she didn't respect her marriage because she did not want anyone to know if she was married or single. I'm guessing that women didn't want to be defined by being a wife, because they are so much more than just a wife. I'm also guessing the women who were married disrespected single women of a certain age. They must have felt ostracized from having fun and enjoying hobbies with married women. As time went on, women told men, by their actions with each other, how they wanted to be treated. Most people, men and women, will treat others the way they treat themselves, though we are supposed to treat others the way we want to be treated. It's usually a subtle change over time. No one knows until it's too late. Then, they wonder why.

Just remember,you get paid to do your job,she doesnt!
I've always had an issue with this. If a stay at home wife or mother does not feel like she is being "paid", is that her husband's fault or is it her fault, or both? You see, if you love whatever it is you are doing, the rewards are there in the validation you get just because you are doing something you love. When someone is "paid", the reward doesn't come until that "paycheck" is dispersed. So, the importance of being a wife and mother who stays home is lost. Children suffer. The marriage suffers. This can be true for both men and women. It's not really a gender issue, since husbands and fathers who really love that "job" do not consider it a job, nor do they believe they are paying for anything. It's just who they are and what they love to do, take care of house, home and family. The loving kindness(read: a husbands love and repect though gifts of service, material things, care of her in sickness, etc.) is just an extension of being what they love to be, a husband and father.

Today, women decide for themselves if they want to work or not. They need to take care of themselves. Many men cannot take care of their wives. They are not educated well enough or smart enough or something, to be able to have a job that can provide all that a stay at home wife and mother with children need. There is nothing sinful about that, to my knowledge. You can correct that last thought if I am in error.

Again, thank you for your thoughts.
 
Last edited:

kaylagrl

Senior Member
Oct 18, 2014
12,205
337
83
#43
Thank you!

I was at the birth of both of my children. I understand what that looks like and don't wish it on anyone. It is what women have gone through since "forever", or the fall of man in the garden. I actually think there is no reason for men to be there, other than to guilt them into respecting their wives. The trouble is, if they didn't respect them before the birth, or didn't really deeply desire children, seeing all that pain won't change most of them. It's a choice to get pregnant today. It isn't a given, unless you are not using any kind of birth control for sex. Both spouses have a responsibility to decide what is best for them.

Some religions prohibit most forms of birth control. Some men have vasectomies and thereby take responsibility for themselves. The latter is usually done by men who believe they are too old to raise children, but will not be celibate within or outside of marriage. Some can't afford children. I think it is a sin to bring children into the world when you know you can't raise them in a reasonably healthy and happy home. You see, it's about what's best for the children, not the parents. Men and women can be married and not have children. I don't see anything wrong with that. It's not a sin to decide you are not ready, willing, or able to have them.

I suppose that is a modern take on marriage. I can remember mum and dad telling me that the only reason to get married was to have children. Otherwise, don't get married. The caveat was to stay celibate. That's tough and I know many here are celibate, and many wish they could be, but are covered by the blood when they sin and confess. I'm not judging. I'm just stating a fact.



I think this is true in some cases. I think children learn to respect women at home. What their parents teach them is what they live. That can change due to what they experience in the world outside their homes by experiencing how others treat women, their wives and their mothers.



I remember calling an older woman "Mrs." when I was a child. As I became an adult, this type of thing waned. I remember some women asking to be called "Ms.". For me, that was the start of not using a salutary prefix. I felt like she didn't respect her marriage because she did not want anyone to know if she was married or single. I'm guessing that women didn't want to be defined by being a wife, because they are so much more than just a wife. I'm also guessing the women who were married disrespected single women of a certain age. They must have felt ostracized from having fun and enjoying hobbies with married women. As time went on, women told men, by their actions with each other, how they wanted to be treated. Most people, men and women, will treat others the way they treat themselves, though we are supposed to treat others the way we want to be treated. It's usually a subtle change over time. No one knows until it's too late. Then, they wonder why.



I've always had an issue with this. If a stay at home wife or mother does not feel like she is being "paid", is that her husband's fault or is it her fault, or both? You see, if you love whatever it is you are doing, the rewards are there in the validation you get just because you are doing something you love. When someone is "paid", the reward doesn't come until that "paycheck" is dispersed. So, the importance of being a wife and mother who stays home is lost. Children suffer. The marriage suffers. This can be true for both men and women. It's not really a gender issue, since husbands and fathers who really love that "job" do not consider it a job, nor do they believe they are paying for anything. It's just who they are and what they love to do, take care of house, home and family. The loving kindness(read: a husbands love and repect though gifts of service, material things, care of her in sickness, etc.) is just an extension of being what they love to be, a husband and father.

Today, women decide for themselves if they want to work or not. They need to take care of themselves. Many men cannot take care of their wives. They are not educated well enough or smart enough or something, to be able to have a job that can provide all that a stay at home wife and mother with children need. There is nothing sinful about that, to my knowledge. You can correct that last thought if I am in error.

Again, thank you for your thoughts.


You definitely made a great point there.Fathers teach their children how to respect their mother! If they dont see it in the home they wont grow up to respect women or their wives. It certainly begins when they are young.

I did not say mothers should be paid to be mothers,how would you ever figure out their worth? I just said that it should be remembered that moms aren't paid to be moms. Moms do so much and they are always on the clock, never a time when mom doesnt have a job to do.So we ought to remember all moms and wives do without complaint and respect them for it.
 
D

didymos

Guest
#44
So I know this doesn't apply to the married men here on CC.:) But I saw this posted on FB and thought it might bring up some interesting discussion...
Sometimes it's hard to be a woman
Giving all your love to just one man
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand...

[video=youtube;IgWKSdkW1A0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgWKSdkW1A0[/video]


Btw... that women HAVE to go fat after childbirth is a myth.
 

kaylagrl

Senior Member
Oct 18, 2014
12,205
337
83
#45
Sometimes it's hard to be a woman
Giving all your love to just one man
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand...

[video=youtube;IgWKSdkW1A0]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgWKSdkW1A0[/video]


Btw... that women HAVE to go fat after childbirth is a myth.


Each couple is different in what they value. My sister said she and her husband promised each other they'd never gain weight when they got married. 13yrs later they both have gained weight. Her husband does not treat her with respect.When I got married I said I dont care if we gain weight,not putting health in danger,but some weight. As long as we treat each other with love and respect. Some people focus way too much on the outward appearance. We'd have a lot less divorces if we'd focus on character as much as we do on looks.
 

oldethennew

Senior Member
Feb 28, 2016
7,606
424
83
#47
Jd,
if you meant that you 'hardily appreciate your wife, then Praise God, -
but if you meant that you 'hardly' appreciate your wife', then you must
be heartily praising somebody/something else...