I understand...you had a REACTION to my post...indicative of what you are now saying and I totally get that!
I spread myself a little thin in rebellion and so I know about about emotional attachments...and how sex is different for young women than young men...
I would react the same but I also can truthfully state that at times I wish someone had whapped me one...I can be very headstrong...see some of that in you too LOL!...I was very disappointed in Christians and went the other way even though I still believed in God...
'my method' is not for everyone...but for a 14 year old I think it appropriate...now you would not do that with an older teen ..but the mother is the last to know in this case...why is that? too much trust on her part?
like I said, trust now has to be earned here...and please no offence, cause I know you had the school of fire growing up, but this girl needs a wake up call in so many ways
I don't see punishment in my response...I see borders and a safety net
I do know a little about what I am saying here, and I think age is a factor...even though a 14 year old today is not like a 14 year old when I was one
I would have one very serious sit down talk with this girl...and not just one time
I did not put it in my post you responded to, but reasoning and discussion must play a very big part but boundaries need to be set by the adults in this one
and as you stated...IMO!