My wife and I

[GenJesus]

I see her point. If hubby wrote me essays to train me right, I'd probably grade them.

Have you always been this disrespectful to her, or is this a new thing you're trying out? Because... it ain't working for you.

I wrote those essays because my opponent is very biblically wrong. I never actually showed those essays to my wife. I think she just knows that I wrote them. My responcibility was to write them. She's sayd that i was better in this marriage; before Afghanistan. I banged my head on the roof edge of a large military vehicle; and our marriage seemd to go to hell after that. Her standards for how hubby should behave; are so HIGH; I just can't meet it. Writing 2 Sabbath/ Sunday essays shows disrespect in what way? Every time I say something; "the wrong way" something... she complaines; its' ATTITUDE.

 

[GenJesus]

I would love to see what you wrote about SDA.

email me. [email protected]

 

[GenJesus]

sounds like your being petty and you have control issues. Seems to me that you are the problem.

I already knew not everybody would take my side. What do u recommend for a solution? If I may ask.

 

[GenJesus]

So, let me understand this....you attack her friends online, so they don't like you and defend her, you rip things off the walls that she thinks is important, because they aren't "biblical", you demean her beliefs calling them a cult....I am waiting or you to say when you actually love her as Christ loves you...or at all?

It says in Romans 14 that what day she considers holy doesn't matter as long as she sets her days to God. And you should do the same. Really, if you choose to love her (remember God IS Love) then you CHOOSE to love ALL of her, not just some parts which you think are approveable. ALL of her, because those differences you two share, are part of what makes her the amazing woman with whom you CHOSE to share the rest of your life.

My advice, based SOLELY on YOUR words is: Go back and apologize to your wife for your disrespect to her both directly and indirectly though disrespecting her friends.
Peace!!

ACTUALLY; somehow her friends see that I talk to Adventists and Sabbatarians, as they for some reason disagree with me doing so; which is nobodies business but my own. The framed Ellen qoute that I GENTLY took down safley; is unbiblical; there's perfectly NO reason it should be hanging up. Can I frame up a "Satanic" pentagram; with no attitudes from Adventists. Why not? Where is Ellen NOW? And don't tell me "heaven".

If ur judgement about what a "cult" is, differes; then that's ur business. She want's me to be the PERFECT husband. She's slammed me with more accusations in different areas, in this marriage, to suggest she has insecurity issues. With her; any possible communication; could be interpreted for attitude or disrespect.

 

[tourist]

Do all SDA believe Ellen was a prophet? It sounds like the assumption is about the same thing as saying all Catholics believe in transubstantiation. It is part of the doctrine, but most Catholics don't believe it anyway.

There's supposed-to-believe and do-believe.

And why are we judging a wife who never came here when it's obvious the husband is the one who needs to repent, (and never came back once he figured out we're not agreeing with him 100%.)

I know quite a few SDA and not one of them believe that she is prophet. I have found that what you have said about Catholics is also true.

 

[GenJesus]

Do all SDA believe Ellen was a prophet? It sounds like the assumption is about the same thing as saying all Catholics believe in transubstantiation. It is part of the doctrine, but most Catholics don't believe it anyway.

There's supposed-to-believe and do-believe.

And why are we judging a wife who never came here when it's obvious the husband is the one who needs to repent, (and never came back once he figured out we're not agreeing with him 100%.)

What do i need to repent of? Taking down a framed FALSE prophet quote?

 

[santuzza]

I think you need a softer approach to your wife. It does sound to me as if she is being a bit condescending, but I also think you're being a bit forceful. My suggestion would be for you two to attend church together -- you go with her on Saturday, and she with you on Sunday. That way you can both learn about each other's church life and can have a calm, open discussion on the subject -- the point of which would be to draw her out of her cult.

Personally, I don't think it matters whether one goes to church on Saturday or Sunday, but there are other doctrinal issues with the SDA that make it a cult and therefore not compatible with biblical Christianity. Read up on it and make sure you have Scripture to back up your objections to her SDA beliefs.

 

[GenJesus]

I think you need a softer approach to your wife. It does sound to me as if she is being a bit condescending, but I also think you're being a bit forceful. My suggestion would be for you two to attend church together -- you go with her on Saturday, and she with you on Sunday. That way you can both learn about each other's church life and can have a calm, open discussion on the subject -- the point of which would be to draw her out of her cult.

Personally, I don't think it matters whether one goes to church on Saturday or Sunday, but there are other doctrinal issues with the SDA that make it a cult and therefore not compatible with biblical Christianity. Read up on it and make sure you have Scripture to back up your objections to her SDA beliefs.

1st I always appreciate anybodies genuine advise. lol she won't go to my church; ... my pastor said something somehow that she didn't like; something. And to let u know; I did read up on that scripture back up; as why I see her church as is in disobiedience; but thanx for that too.

 

[Miri]

If some doctrinal difference are the only thing wrong with your marriage,
then honestly I think you are blessed.

There are couples out there dealing with far worse.

I can only imagine that this is just the tip of the iceberg and that there are
other issues also, maybe the biggest one is lack of communication and
respect for each other.

Is it really worth throwing a marriage away because of this.

Maybe you might want to look at marriage counselling.

 

[GenJesus]

If some doctrinal difference are the only thing wrong with your marriage,
then honestly I think you are blessed.

There are couples out there dealing with far worse.

I can only imagine that this is just the tip of the iceberg and that there are
other issues also, maybe the biggest one is lack of communication and
respect for each other.

Is it really worth throwing a marriage away because of this.

Maybe you might want to look at marriage counselling.

I'm trying not to throw away this marriage. Every time I inadvertently say something; "wrong"; she accusses me of attitude. The very latest thing is the dumb joke concept of "bean dipping" as the young adults are calling it. I never knew about it till my Africa time with my armory guys. Its having somebody mess with my nipple; like a light switch; ... YES with my shirt and army top ON! My wife insists this means fooling around on her. She thinks this means she can fool around on me.

At my best conscience; i can say i didn't have my female colleage do anything SO CHEATING TERRIBLE; that my wife has anything to get upset about. I already told her Im not doing that again. And we are now trying to make ammends. GOD IN HEAVEN!

 

[NewWine]

ACTUALLY; somehow her friends see that I talk to Adventists and Sabbatarians, as they for some reason disagree with me doing so; which is nobodies business but my own. The framed Ellen qoute that I GENTLY took down safley; is unbiblical; there's perfectly NO reason it should be hanging up. Can I frame up a "Satanic" pentagram; with no attitudes from Adventists. Why not? Where is Ellen NOW? And don't tell me "heaven".

If ur judgement about what a "cult" is, differes; then that's ur business. She want's me to be the PERFECT husband. She's slammed me with more accusations in different areas, in this marriage, to suggest she has insecurity issues. With her; any possible communication; could be interpreted for attitude or disrespect.

So what you're really saying is your problems with your wife have absolutely nothing to do with her beliefs, but with the high standards she sets for you?
Y'all need to set down and have a conversation. Not a debate, not an argument, but a dialog, where you express your concerns about her expectations of you, and she expresses her concerns with things. Only through HONEST COMMUNICATION will y'all resolve your issues with each other to come to a livable peace.
Taking things off the walls, whether gently or forcefully, that she feels are nice or important would be the same as her boxing up your belonging and putting them into storage.....disrespectful. She's not following some cult, she's simply believing differently than you. Yes I know you believe the SDA are a cult, and that's fine, but my grandma told me once that when it comes to life, especially married life...you can be right or you can be happy but rarely can you be both, and dude....you nor your wife are right here.

 

[coby]

My dad had a kabbalah book. My mom threw it away when he didn't see it. A friend of her, her husband had an idol in the home. She threw it over and said it was an accident. But you may not lie. Bind that demon in Jesus' Name and kick it out of your house. Then either only the demon leaves or she leaves too. My ex was on drugs and had those occult WOW monsters. I prayed for him for salvation and had a bunch of pastors pray and I told the devil to leave, but then he left too.
My mom fasted and prayed for my dad 3 days. He stayed.
Have you prayed that God opens her eyes and bound the powers that blind her?

 

[NewWine]

I am going to try to be gentler here.....when you married this person, you CHOSE to become ONE with her. For Better or Worse, through sickness and health...so instead of calling her names (cultist) and hurting her (therefore hurting yourself because y'all are one), treat her with the same Love that Christ showed you in your dark times. Show her Christ living in you instead of trying to show her how she's wrong. God IS Love. Love is Patient and kind. It's gentle, doesn't hold a grudge, doesn't anger quickly. It overcomes ALL things. Be the Christ she needs to see to draw her to Him. Don't be the reason she wants nothing to do with you or your denomination/church. Be gentle with her. Love her through ALL instead of simply wanting to throw the towel in because you don't like how she is right now. Accept your responsibility for your actions. Accept her as she is, and show her the same mercy and grace you were shown by Christ. That is all you can do, in all honesty.

 

[Depleted]

The SDA is a cult because Ellen White claimed to have had visions of an angel giving her another gospel, which as we know from the Bible is Satan's modus operandi for creating false prophets. SDA is more comparable Islam or Mormonism than Christianity.

Really? Where should I send my two essays on what "wrong" should mean to you so you get how I'm always right and you are wrong? Mind if I display you over the Internet as the wrong one for all to see? Mind if I undecorate your office/living room/man cave because I personally object to how you decorate them?

Would I then annoy you?

I would hope so!

Now, tell me -- what does that annoyance turn into if I'm your spouse? Spouses are supposed to love each other and take care of each other, not treat the other one like a first grader being schooled by the master.

 

[Miri]

I'm trying not to throw away this marriage. Every time I inadvertently say something; "wrong"; she accusses me of attitude. The very latest thing is the dumb joke concept of "bean dipping" as the young adults are calling it. I never knew about it till my Africa time with my armory guys. Its having somebody mess with my nipple; like a light switch; ... YES with my shirt and army top ON! My wife insists this means fooling around on her. She thinks this means she can fool around on me.

At my best conscience; i can say i didn't have my female colleage do anything SO CHEATING TERRIBLE; that my wife has anything to get upset about. I already told her Im not doing that again. And we are now trying to make ammends. GOD IN HEAVEN!

It sounds like you both need to have a good long think about what
you want and where it has all gone wrong. There is an old saying that two
wrongs don't make a right. Often people get so caught up in fighting their
own battle and trying to justify themselves, that they can't even
remember what triggered the animosity in the first place.

You need to have a think about what you want, if you want the relationship to
continue then you will just have to suck it up, be the first to apologise and
let your wife know how much she means to you. Talk to her about marriage
counselling and give her time to think about it and what she wants.

Its time to call a truce and try to sort this out. One of you has to be the
bigger person to resolve this and as you have raised the question, then
guess what, it's gonna have to be you. But do it willingly not grudgingly.
Life is just too short to be arguing about the day of the week.

 

[Depleted]

I might like to think this could work; YET TOO MUCH has gone wrong. Yes; I just about HAVE washed my hands of her. I'll be leaving her; at least for a matter of months; and that does mean even she and I DO divorce, and if I can never meet a new person again for a very specific reason.
This morning her car keys were missing; and she blamed me, pretty much because I took down her Ellen White quote at her pantry. This last weekend at my NG armory; I had a female colleage "bean dip" me. Thats' as in to do my nipple area, like a light switch. My wife insists this is no different than cheating; which I completely disagree. And she insists that I gave her the right, as of now, to fool around on me. I didn't "fool around" on her; that's not cheating. And that's going to be last drills dumb joke; that I'm not doing again.

She now accuses me of calling her church, really what it is; a devil church.Too much is wrong with us anymore. I've concluded either I'm not fit to be married; or I'm not fit to be married to HER! She's giving me soooo many accusations over the years anyway. I'm about to tell her; "BYE!"

Great, so your ego is more important to you than your wife. This leads nowhere except she gets some sense of life apart from being the submissive to a dominatrix for a while before she may ultimately end up in hell. No concept of love at all, huh?

 

[Depleted]

I might like to think this could work; YET TOO MUCH has gone wrong. Yes; I just about HAVE washed my hands of her. I'll be leaving her; at least for a matter of months; and that does mean even she and I DO divorce, and if I can never meet a new person again for a very specific reason.
This morning her car keys were missing; and she blamed me, pretty much because I took down her Ellen White quote at her pantry. This last weekend at my NG armory; I had a female colleage "bean dip" me. Thats' as in to do my nipple area, like a light switch. My wife insists this is no different than cheating; which I completely disagree. And she insists that I gave her the right, as of now, to fool around on me. I didn't "fool around" on her; that's not cheating. And that's going to be last drills dumb joke; that I'm not doing again.

She now accuses me of calling her church, really what it is; a devil church.Too much is wrong with us anymore. I've concluded either I'm not fit to be married; or I'm not fit to be married to HER! She's giving me soooo many accusations over the years anyway. I'm about to tell her; "BYE!"

Hey, folks? Might want to google bean dip as a sexual act. I think this guy is a troll. A recent troll on this forum too.

 

[blue_ladybug]

I reported the post with the email addy. It was very foolish and stupid for him to post it for the ENTIRE world to see. Now the trolls will troll HIM. :/ lol

 

[GodIsSalvation]

Really? Where should I send my two essays on what "wrong" should mean to you so you get how I'm always right and you are wrong? Mind if I display you over the Internet as the wrong one for all to see? Mind if I undecorate your office/living room/man cave because I personally object to how you decorate them?

Would I then annoy you?

I would hope so!

Now, tell me -- what does that annoyance turn into if I'm your spouse? Spouses are supposed to love each other and take care of each other, not treat the other one like a first grader being schooled by the master.

I don't see guy as that controlling not by what he has said. I get sentiment of still wanting to try with her, I suppose I can only imagine, being the single guy but if I try to place myself in that situation I be taking that Ellen White stuff down too for sure. I get the sentiment, idk, maybe the virgin naiveté but I would avoid a divorce and try hard to convert her too at almost all costs. It's a hard thing though to ask someone else to do that though, plus having to live with and the spouse being a whole other religion and seeming by his words to not want to budge from that, that's very tough, so I cannot fault a guy if he just wants to leave either. Though yes, I know despite my naiveté I personally would still try to work something out, but then again part of that virgin naiveté is to try to not have them problems in the first place lol.

The "bean dip" thing did kinda throw me though, never heard that expression. I assume Sir Gen is a serious guy with serious problem, but aye I am limited all I can offer is advice and my own perspective. Don't go looking for no other women at this time. No playing with this co-worker or letting her play with you. Try to keep your own princess and bring her out of the cult or I find no fault in you departing and fleeing far from her and the community and the SDA cult connections in general. All the cults will fall one day, their day of reckoning cometh nigh soon too. Take comfort in Jesus and praise God.