Need advice please.

  • Thread starter Livingforchrist
  • Start date
  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#1
Hello everyone, my partner and I have been together for 6 years and we have 2 children. For the past few months I have been reading my bible and building a relationship with our Lord. I have been wanting to talk to everyone about God and leading my partner and children toward Christ. The issue is the other day I woke up with a feeling that I had to tell an old friend about Christ, because he really needs Jesus. I messaged him and told him how I have been reading the bible and how he should get to know Jesus, and he asks me if I can call him, so I do and he tells me how a few weeks ago a man spoke to him about God and gave him a bible, while at work and the man told him "I'll see you again next week" but it's been a few weeks and he never saw the man that gave him the bible again. He told me how he has been wanting to read it, and get closer to Jesus, but he didn't know how to begin, I offered to read him a few bible verses and email him a guide on how to begin reading it and offered my help if he ever needed help with understanding or something. I just don't know if I'm doing wrong, because my partner is jealous and wouldn't allow me to talk to him, because he is an old boyfriend, but I really do care about him, because we've known each other since we were children and his life has been tough and I know how much he needs Christ. Therefore, I don't know if I did wrong with contacting him to tell him about God or if I did the correct thing, because I know he needs God in his life. Sorry for the long post. And thank you in advance.
 

JFSurvivor

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2015
1,184
25
0
#2
Hmm...talk to your partner about this and explain that there are no romantic feelings for him anymore. Maybe your partner isn't quite secure in your relationship. Assure him of how much you love him and care for him. Maybe even get couples therapy. Just a thought.
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#3
Thank you for the advice, he probably wouldn't understand. Maybe couples therapy would be a good idea. Thank you again.
 

1joseph

Senior Member
Dec 14, 2014
590
12
18
#5
Are you married?
 

Dan58

Senior Member
Nov 13, 2013
1,991
338
83
#6

Your partner isn't comfortable with you seeing an old boyfriend that you really care about? Hmm, imagine that..

Its probably not a good idea for you to tutor old boyfriends. Just tell him to start reading the gospels and recommend a church or bible study that he can attend and learn.. Then I'd leave it alone.. If he's genuinely interested, he'll move forward without your help. jmo
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#7
Not yet, for one reason or another. But we are going to get married soon, I hope.
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#8
Thank you, your opinion is appreciated. I've just known him since we were children, nothing romantically going on.
 
G

Galahad

Guest
#9
Not yet, for one reason or another. But we are going to get married soon, I hope.
And you also wrote: "Thank you for the advice, he probably wouldn't understand. Maybe couples therapy would be a good idea. Thank you again."

You live with him, but not married. He's okay with it!
and
You are not certain why you two aren't married!
and
You don't know if you're going to get married to him.
and
You know he won't assist you with helping your former boyfriend with learning about Jesus. (Your current boyfriend could very easily offered to assist your former boyfriend. And he could've done that after he made a commitment to you.)

So with all this, what would you say to your former boyfriend that would convince him that living for Christ is far better and more joyful than not living for Christ?

LFC, I do not intend to be rude to you. If you really want to help your former friend and anyone else with the Bible and learning about Christ, you need to know that if living for Christ leads to "I hope we will be married" and to a jealous boyfriend, and to one who won't talk to you and help you with the Lord, then what can you say to your former boyfriend that would be of any meaning?

I hope this helps. I don't know all the conditions and history of your circumstances. I am only replying to what you wrote.

Best to you and your friends
 
Last edited:
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#10
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to reply, I know my life is not perfect, but I am trying to walk with The Lord. Ever since I started reading the bible and talking to Jesus, my life took a drastic change for the better and I know it was because Jesus is by my side. I want to share with my family and friends, what Jesus has done for me, even if as you have stated what meaning could I give to someone else's life about Jesus, if my life isn't in order.

When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance. (*Mark‬ *2‬:*17‬ KJV)
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
11,782
2,947
113
#11
One of the most important parts about walking with Jesus and following him is repenting of your sins.

You do know that living together with someone, not married, is sin, right?

I would not even worry about this other person. You need to evaluate what is going on in your own relationship. I think you need to move out, decide if you can live the rest of your life with a man who does not follow God. The bible tells us not to be yoked with unbelievers. If you were married, it would be a different story, but you are not.

I also think it is great you were reaching out to this old friend, but what kind of witness is it, if you are living in "sin?" Tell him to go to a church and find men who can support him in his walk with God.

As for you, please spend some serious time in prayer about your relationship. If you are not married, you should not be living with your "partner." Period.
 
G

Galahad

Guest
#12
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to reply, I know my life is not perfect, but I am trying to walk with The Lord. Ever since I started reading the bible and talking to Jesus, my life took a drastic change for the better and I know it was because Jesus is by my side. I want to share with my family and friends, what Jesus has done for me, even if as you have stated what meaning could I give to someone else's life about Jesus, if my life isn't in order.

When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance. (*Mark‬ *2‬:*17‬ KJV)
If you get the chance or the opportunity to assist your friend, share with him how much better your life is. Glad to hear it.

Understand that I was not throwing stones at you and hope you didn't interpret my reply as doing so.

The OP and the replies to others, seemed as if there was little thought or regard to such things as "living with my partner" or "he's jealous and he wouldn't allow me to talk to him" "Not married for one reason or another" and "I hope so". These are big issues, major decisions you have to make.

Your care and concern for your friend, that's most commendable. I failed to acknowledge that in my reply. I should have.

Perhaps you know of a married couple who would assist your friend. Or maybe a minister.

Write up an outline or just list scriptures with a few notes of your own, ask your boyfriend to read it. And then send it to your former friend.

Just some ideas. Hope they help.

Thank you.
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#13
Thank you for your reply, and yes I know it's a sin. I started reading the scripture and talking to Jesus a few months ago, and I have been living with my partner for a few years now. When I was catholic and believed I would obtain salvation by going to church once in a while. And now that I have read the gospel I see my faults and I want to correct them, most of you have probably been saved for a while now, but we must all start somewhere right? I don't want to make excuses for myself I know that my situation is incorrect, but I want to fix my faults and be right with The Lord.
 
G

Galahad

Guest
#14
If you get the chance or the opportunity to assist your friend, share with him how much better your life is. Glad to hear it.

Understand that I was not throwing stones at you and hope you didn't interpret my reply as doing so.

The OP and the replies to others, seemed as if there was little thought or regard to such things as "living with my partner" or "he's jealous and he wouldn't allow me to talk to him" "Not married for one reason or another" and "I hope so". These are big issues, major decisions you have to make.

Your care and concern for your friend, that's most commendable. I failed to acknowledge that in my reply. I should have.

Perhaps you know of a married couple who would assist your friend. Or maybe a minister.

Write up an outline or just list scriptures with a few notes of your own, ask your boyfriend to read it. And then send it to your former friend.

Just some ideas. Hope they help.

Thank you.

I almost edited my reply.

I was going to add that you send the letter "if your present boyfriend says it is fine."

You should be able to send it. Since your present boyfriend is not your husband, and since you serve the Lord, and since you believe your other friend needs to hear the truth, you should be able to send it.

If you were married, you would have to take that into consideration. Is your boyfriend a believer?
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#15
No, thank you! All the advice is welcoming. We are not to sugar coat the scripture. So I know my situation is not the best, but I do want to correct it. Thank you for your help and I hope you have a very blessed day. God Bless you :)
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#16
He grew up in a catholic household as did I, and for a few months I have opened my eyes to some truths and have been sharing the word of God with my boyfriend and he welcomes it and he believes and he wants our children to walk with The Lord, but he doesn't read the scripture on his own; I usually text him verses or show him the gospel on tv, but I want him to become more involved.
 
G

Galahad

Guest
#17
I never thought about this until my previous reply.

Suppose the government forbid you and all others from teaching the Bible?

I know. Your boyfriend ain't the government, but he's telling you not to teach.

"We ought to obey God rather than man."

Not suggesting you send it off with no regard toward your boyfriend. But he's not the determining factor.

Are you sure you want to be a relationship with your boyfriend? If he doesn't support you now, why would he later.

If he's opposed altogether of you even finding others who can help your friend . . .!
 
G

Galahad

Guest
#18
He grew up in a catholic household as did I, and for a few months I have opened my eyes to some truths and have been sharing the word of God with my boyfriend and he welcomes it and he believes and he wants our children to walk with The Lord, but he doesn't read the scripture on his own; I usually text him verses or show him the gospel on tv, but I want him to become more involved.

Okay. This is good.

I will pray. Hope somehow your friend is helped.

Continue with your walk no matter how difficult.
Continue to rely on God and His word.
You are blessing to those around you.
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#19
When are you considered a married couple in The Lord? Marriage by church or the law?
 
L

Livingforchrist

Guest
#20
Thank you so much for taking the time to write to me, I really appreciate it. He doesn't mind me telling friends and family about the gospel, he is just a little insecure and jealous. His father was really controlling with his mother when he was a child and he got affected from that, but I'm trying to help him. Thank you again, for you kind words. May God Bless you always.