Should I let go of a marriage my husband doesn’t want?

[Toyin]

My compassion goes out to you, but I'll like to say that as bad ad it may look, there's still room for victory on the matter. Let quickly say this that a lot in terms of the possibility to save your heart and marriage lies with you. I'm in transit, I'll come back soon to explain.

I am currently struggling with a major life decision. Do I keep trying to save a marriage my husband doesn’t want to be in or do I let go and get divorced. We have been married for 10 years now. He says we have grown into different people and I no longer make him happy. Nor does he think he will ever be happy in our marriage. Regardless if things are changed. He goes out every night and now does not come home. He still provides financially as he says he “feels bad” for hurting me. In the beginning I was angry and was ready to give up. But then I started really praying and decided I wanted to fight for my marriage. But how do you fight for a marriage your spouse doesn’t want? He is enjoying being single and not having to worry about anyone but himself. He has never had that as we have been together since we were 18. We have two small children and I think we should try to work it out. We attended marriage counseling last week and he has agreed to go back. But he says only because he thinks it’s the only way to get divorced peacefully. At this point I’m not sure what to do. He says he no longer loves me and just feels sorry for me because I still love him. I apologize for the long post. I’m just struggling with the decision to let him go and start the healing process or keep fighting. Has anyone else been in this situation? Any prayers are appreciated.

 

[Toyin]

I don't want to assume that your husband isn't a christian because of this issue, rather he may also be going through a crisis phase is his life. Meanwhile, you have an upperhand in getting a solution to this matter.
One, you need to realize that nobody has any power to change any other person apart from yourself, so if he will change, it's in his hand and God's hand. If God has your total surrender, perseverance and patience on the matter, you'll both give a glorious testimony soon.

The starting point to realize that the first experience of LIGHT came out of DARKNESS, so the solution to every problem lies right within the problem. While you cooperate with God in changing you to your best, maintain a fresh and regular fellowship with Him, insights to your current problem and the cause will start flooding your heart as revelation, follow up by God's recommended solution. Expect the unusual, so don't close your mind to His instructions, whatever it may be.

Please, from experience, don't adopt the attitude of begging him, sometimes it put men off in this kind of situation. Also, be relaxed, take care of him as well as the children as if there's no problem. Ask him constantly what you can do to make him come up to his best.

If he has not come to the point of physically abusing you or becoming violent, just maintain your word study and dialogue-driven prayer style. In order words, don't just prayer without waiting for direction on what to do.

In all your write up on this issue, you didn't mention what the Lord told you about the situation. Most of the time, we don't wait to listen to God's response when we pray on any matter. Our prayers, first and foremost changes us, and the reflection changes those with whom we have issues. Can you remember this scriptures; "If the way of a man pleases God, He'll make his enemies to be at peace with him".

I'll appreciate your response to these points/advice I've raised here.

Wish you a permanent victory, sooner than later.

 

[Toyin]

I don't want to assume that your husband isn't a christian because of this issue, rather he may also be going through a crisis phase is his life. Meanwhile, you have an upperhand in getting a solution to this matter.
One, you need to realize that nobody has any power to change any other person apart from yourself, so if he will change, it's in his hand and God's hand. If God has your total surrender, perseverance and patience on the matter, you'll both give a glorious testimony soon.

The starting point to realize that the first experience of LIGHT came out of DARKNESS, so the solution to every problem lies right within the problem. While you cooperate with God in changing you to your best, maintain a fresh and regular fellowship with Him, insights to your current problem and the cause will start flooding your heart as revelation, follow up by God's recommended solution. Expect the unusual, so don't close your mind to His instructions, whatever it may be.

Please, from experience, don't adopt the attitude of begging him, sometimes it put men off in this kind of situation. Also, be relaxed, take care of him as well as the children as if there's no problem. Ask him constantly what you can do to make him come up to his best.

If he has not come to the point of physically abusing you or becoming violent, just maintain your word study and dialogue-driven prayer style. In order words, don't just prayer without waiting for direction on what to do.

In all your write up on this issue, you didn't mention what the Lord told you about the situation. Most of the time, we don't wait to listen to God's response when we pray on any matter. Our prayers, first and foremost changes us, and the reflection changes those with whom we have issues. Can you remember this scriptures; "If the way of a man pleases God, He'll make his enemies to be at peace with him".

I'll appreciate your response to these points/advice I've raised here.

Wish you a permanent victory, sooner than later

 

[kim12345]

Don't give up