Trying to choose husband over parents
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I'd leave your husbands anger with himself. Disowning your parents because of his unwillingness to forgive them seems counter-productive. If hubby doesn't want to see your parents, that's fine, but its a negative influence to forbid you from maintaining a healthy relationship with them. Remember, your husband invaded your private text messages where your Dad expressed his feelings to you, so if your husband was minding his own business in the first place, there wouldn't be an issue. Its just sounds like since your parents didn't approve of how your husband was acting and treating you, so he is now using you to get back at them. Your father's apology wasn't good enough for him? Please.. Don't be a pawn used to punish your parents, they did nothing but express their opinion to you, and I suspect they were right? jmo
You should read my post about my father in-law. It's difficult dealing with in-laws. In the end my situation with my FIL and myself came to a happy middle. I spent Christmas with him and my wife's family, and things are on the positive. God answers prayers, this situation was heavy in my heart for awhile. There still isn't a perfect finish to it but that is something that I pray about.
Seems like most of the posts in this thread are simply advising to go with the spouse over the parents. But the elephant in the room is your husband's failure to forgive your parents for whatever it is that they did. (I'm guessing their infraction is fairly minor.) Perhaps you should tell your husband to put on his big boy pants and forgive them. His behavior seems rather childish if you ask me.
There is a difference between choosing your husband and being isolated from loved ones. Waiting for parents to be sincere doesn't sound mature to me. You dad reached out and attempted an apology. It sounds like you're spouse is unforgiving. You did choose your husband and you should but if he is trying to keep you from family, there may be some things that your husband needs to work through. I'm sorry he is questioning (and perhaps demanding?) your loyalty. Your parents may be in the wrong but to burn bridges is a bit of an extreme. I pray you can find a balance.
Sounds like this issue is one-sided. He is placing his hurt and fears as a higher priority than yours. This isn't about loyalty and this isn't about submitting This is just about him. Marriage is about your unity and equality. Not power and submission. If he knows this is hurting you but doesn't care that speaks volumes of his view of the relationship and your role. To me this is a big red flag. If he isn't temperamental, try to discuss the lack of balance in your relationship.
If your husband cannot see that this was an act of choosing your marriage already what more could prove it otherwise. Second your parents sound manipulative using scripture to get you to feel bad. Sounds like both your husband and parents are in the wrong but in different ways. Your parents shouldn't be shaming and trying to use scripture as a means to get what they want from you. Yet your husband shouldn't be questioning your commitment to your marriage either, and furthermore shouldn't demand you to disown your family. Much prayer for you
This has only been going on for about 2 months now so perhaps not enough time to say this won't be resolved but I'm starting to feel like the only way this marriage works is if I make my parents my enemy and side with my husband, but I don't agree with him. I'm actually trying to do that but it just makes me feel sad and isolated. My husband thinks I shouldn't be around them if they are against the marriage, but the only thing they are against is my unhappiness. All I even want at this point is for him to come around for like two days out of the year. Just some holidays. But he won't, and than I'm a bad wife if I want to see my parents on Christmas and leave him at home.