Woman taking a man's surname upon marriage

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SamIam

Guest
#21
Wow that's a really solid attitude, good on you.


And Grace I didn't realise there were legal/consent issues with having a different name from your kids...so do your kids still have your ex-husband's name? (Sorry to be probing - this topic interests me). If he passed away, wouldn't you change your kids' surnames to your maiden name instead of hyphenating yours? Thanks for your input by the way :)
ohh my gosh.... is that what all men want..... some woman thats just gonna bow at their feet and agree with everything they say! noooooo thank you!
 
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chelsers

Guest
#22
ohh my gosh.... is that what all men want..... some woman thats just gonna bow at their feet and agree with everything they say! noooooo thank you!
Thank you! Oh and I forgot to add that I'll marry someone that would be smart enough to change a strange name and not impose it on his kids :)
 

Sharp

Senior Member
May 5, 2009
2,565
20
38
#23
ohh my gosh.... is that what all men want..... some woman thats just gonna bow at their feet and agree with everything they say! noooooo thank you!

So Chelsers, and Sam (if you were a woman), if you met the perfect guy, and his surname was Nostril, but he refused to marry you unless you changed your surname to Nostril, would you refuse to marry him?
 
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chelsers

Guest
#24
So Chelsers, and Sam (if you were a woman), if you met the perfect guy, and his surname was Nostril, but he refused to marry you unless you changed your surname to Nostril, would you refuse to marry him?
He wouldn't be the perfect guy then...
 

Sharp

Senior Member
May 5, 2009
2,565
20
38
#25
Ok, Mr. Nostril is 99% perfect. The only thing wrong with him is his name. Wouldn't you live with being Mrs. Nostril if it meant you were with the BEST man in the world?
 
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chelsers

Guest
#26
Ok, Mr. Nostril is 99% perfect. The only thing wrong with him is his name. Wouldn't you live with being Mrs. Nostril if it meant you were with the BEST man in the world?
I'm thinking about the potential children with Mr. Nostril. Why would such a great guy subject his kids to that other than for some alpha male macho pride thing? I'm not even asking him to take my name I'm just saying "hey lets change it to something else less ridiculous." And since he had to put up with it, he should think yeah I don't want my kids to have to. Mr. Nostril is a selfish man!

I just laughed really hard writing that :)
 
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MusicalMe

Guest
#27
I had a friend who got her last name this way:

Her grandfather's surname was Unfried (German - sounds like "oon-freed"), but he grandmother thought it looked like "un-fried" so she asked him to drop the "I" and it became "Unfred."

Maybe Mr. Nostil could either drop a letter (Notril, or something) or you could just convince everyone the pronunciation is different. "Hi, I'm Mrs. 'No-Stree'..."
 

grace

Senior Member
Sep 8, 2006
1,064
11
0
51
#28
Wow that's a really solid attitude, good on you.


And Grace I didn't realise there were legal/consent issues with having a different name from your kids...so do your kids still have your ex-husband's name? (Sorry to be probing - this topic interests me). If he passed away, wouldn't you change your kids' surnames to your maiden name instead of hyphenating yours? Thanks for your input by the way :)
I don't mind you *probing* the issue as you put it...lol

Well, I kept his name too...lol As I have said in earlier posts, it makes things so much more difficult when you have a different last name as the children. I had the choice to change my name back to my maiden name...but opted not to due to my children. BUT...if there were no children, and he still wanted the divorce, I more than likely would have taken my maiden name back.
Further on....if he were to pass away, and I were to re-marry at that point...I do not think I would marry someone that would not want to legally adopt the children. We are a package deal :) (and upon that adoption they would legally take his name as I have...no hyphenating involved :))

Does that all make sense..??? lol

Just another reason divorce is a bad idea :( I truly fought for my marriage and contested it all the way through..they just make it so easy to break apart a family.
 
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SamIam

Guest
#29
So Chelsers, and Sam (if you were a woman), if you met the perfect guy, and his surname was Nostril, but he refused to marry you unless you changed your surname to Nostril, would you refuse to marry him?
If i was a woman... and i met a guy who was perfect for me and we really loved each other...... i would change my last name to whatever he wanted....
 
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missy2shoes

Guest
#30
ahhhhhhh if ya was a woman ;).....see there's the catch :p
 
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SamIam

Guest
#31
hahahahaha exactly and seeing how OBVIOUSLY im NOT!!! there would be noooo need for that
 
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collective

Guest
#32
my husband took my last name on and i stayed as my last mame, in the state of QLD he had to change it by depoll, why? his mother was or still is a prostitute andf sold him as a prostitute at a very young age and his father who was her client even though she was unsure if he was the father married him and he use to rape him, His father is dead now years ago from a drug overdose and my husband has nothing to do with his mother or brothers and hasnt seen them in years and doesnt want anything to do with them, so my last name has become his, i wouldve preferred to have my last name changed to my husbands for my life but it didnt work out that way
 
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nanabean

Guest
#33
I didn't take my hubby's surname when we got married....he still has it!!!!
 
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nanabean

Guest
#34
Ok hahah now I will be serious!!! I am honored to tell you I "took my hubby's surname" when we got married. I was and am in love with him and it is the best in the world to have the same name as he has....it helps make our family ....a family....if that makes sense?? 23 years and 2 children later, I wouldn't have it any other way, and I do pray that when my girls get married they don't hyphenate their names, they can just take THEIR new hubby's names!!! I do know a girl whose name consists of her first name, two middle names, a religous?? name, then her mom's maiden name hyphenated with her dad's surname....that to me is a bit..much. hahaa!
 
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cornerstone

Guest
#36
God called Adam and Eve, Adam Gen. 5:2 (Ithink that is the reference)
When you marry someone you are united as one- it honors the husband to take his name and shows a level of submission and honor to your relationship
It shows your children your commitment to him.
Why promote confusion--? Daddy won't take Daddy's name, why is that?
 
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BellaFlor

Guest
#37
I think one should take the husband's surename when marrying. Also because we become One in the flesh, and it is a way to honour him and God.
Also you move from your parents to him, so you're supposed being free from your parents and submissive to your husband.
 
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broken

Guest
#38
I am not aware of any biblical rule that requires a woman to take a man's surname. I believe this to be tradition. I do think not doing may indicate a certain degree of unwillingness to submit on the part of the woman, but I am speaking in broad terms. There are always exceptions. The long and the short - I see no requirement to do so in the bible.
 
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christiancollegegirl

Guest
#39
When I was engaged, not taking my fiancees name was never an option. I always assumed I would take his name. I did play around with the idea of hyphenatig it, but decided not to. I didn't get married after all, so I still have my original name.
 
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ClimbingUpward

Guest
#40
That's an interesting one.

I think that once married the woman should take on the man's surname, but I also understand some for not doing so. One of my friends for example, her partners surname is not one that she wishes to marry into and I can in a way understand why. His isn't really all that bad, but there are some pretty weird ones out there.

Hyphenated...that's just crazy. Why add more to your signature?

I don't think the husband should force her to take his name if she doesn't wish to. The Bible also says that husband and wife are equal, treat each other with respect.

The children usually do take on the husband's name. I haven't heard of any instances where the children have taken on the mother's name, but that doesn't mean it hasn't happened.

What's say, the husband and wife separate, and the mother gets full custody of the child/ren, and she has the child/ren go by her surname?