Worried and Confused.....

[Hava91]

The events, and the harrassment (random calls, midnight appearances at the house, damage to my moms car, broken beer bottles all over the driveway etc) and the child i now have to provide for and keep safe. MAYBE im just being over sensitive to that, But in my mind, the man that chose to force sex on me does not have any right to harrass me or the child or be involved in our lives. enough has been forced on me by him and i will NOT allow the rest of my life to be forced into any further contact with him.....i started this post trying to figure out what to pray for, and i really do appreciate the helpful answers...but ignorant responses that suggest that a rapist be allowed access to a child that is a product of his rape...i cant even begin to explain how enfuriating that is... i made mistakes in the situation, obviously starting with hanging out with sumone i shouldnt have trusted, but that doesnt give him right to ANYTHING.

 

[Hava91]

Is it any wonder why women never come out with their rape experiances to the media. or hardly ever report them. as much support as you can get from a few good people - the negative comments slam you down so much farther than you started. I wish people would do more research on the psychology of domestic violence and abuse....things change greatly in your mind. I'm sorry for psuedo-exploding via post. since deleting threads is not a capability of this site id like to request no further comments.....to explain everything would take a great deal of time and explainations that i dont know how to give....and i get the feeling the only comments that will come now are more questions.

 

[NinJaGGS]

This is a prayer for those who know not what to ask Our Heavenly Father for...

Prayer of St. Philaret of Moscow

Lord, I do not know what to beg of Thee;
Thou alone knowest what is needed for me.
Thou lovest me more than I know
how to love Thee.
O Father, give to Thy slave that for which I do
not even know how to beg.
I do not dare to ask for either a cross
or for consolation;
I am only standing before Thee
with my heart open to Thee.
Thou seest my needs, which I do not even know.
See and deal with me according to Thy mercy.
Purge and heal me, humble me and raise me;
I am in awe before Thee
and I am silent before Thy will
and Thine unfathomable ways for me.
I am bringing myself as a sacrifice to Thee;
teach me to pray.
Pray Thyself within me.
Amen.

My sincere condolences to you for this atrocity. Even in the horror of the situation God's mighty hand is still at work in your life. Having a child may become a great blessing and yield happiness and joy for you, one thing is certain, that this is not the end, but the beginning

 

[AnandaHya]

I apologize if I offended you, but your story is confusing and if you explained it to the police the same way you did to us then they would be confused as well.

I suggest you file one of these:

WomensLaw.org | Oregon: Stalking Protection Orders


its a protective order against stalkers. I should warn you though rather you like it or not the father does have rights to see their children.

You said he is banned from seeing his other kids and you may be able to build a case that his is an unfit father but you should prepare yourself if he actually thinks to try and obtain legal rights to see your son.

the first thing is to have a record. if he sends you letters, calls or makes any contact, record the time, date and message and save it in a file. If you have people with you, write down their names and that will begin building your case.

You mentioned that he damaged your mom's car. Save the repair bill costs. documentation is important in cases like this, especially if it involves children.

I'm glad to hear you kept him away from your little sister, though it still seems strange to take him on a trip with you.

You can't send mixed messages.


Anyway I'll keep you and your family in my prayers and stop bothering you now.

you can find contact info for some local support organizations on this page:

http://www.womenslaw.org/gethelp_state_type.php?type_name=State and Local Programs&state_code=OR

 

[RedTent]

Good for you, doing all you can to protect yourself..

You are part of the Lord’s family, He wants you protected and blessed.

Our Father has you in His care, He even sent His son for us. You are free to just experience His joy.

Galatians 5:22
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

May the Lord Bless and Keep you. You are in His hands, nothing could be better.

 

[niceguyJ]

I read this thread earlier, but needed some time to process it before I could respond. Some of this is going to be directed to Hava, but some of it is going to be directed to those who have replied, or might reply in the future.

About the questioning: A couple of the posts you made are a bit confusing in parts. I think I mostly get it now, but I'm not 100% sure. I don't need to be to say what I want to say though.
One thought I had is that you mentioned you're typing from a phone sometimes or maybe all the time? That might make it harder to get the typing and wording and such right. I could understand that. Plus, I don't think this would be an easy thing to talk about to begin with.

There is a history of people coming on CC and making up all kinds of lies and stories to get attention, etc. So I think some are just trying to make sure that you and your story are legit. Others are just trying to get the full picture here. Try not to take that too personally. If you don't want to give anymore details, you certainly don't have to.
I would just encourage you to stick around and you'll lose that "new girl" tag before you know it. I've seen some of your posts here before this thread, and I appreciated reading what you had to say. You seem like a nice, intelligent girl.

When someone goes through what Hava has, it's going to take them some time to think more clearly.. Like she said up there, things can change in your mind. So for anyone questioning her decision to take that guy along on the trip after what happened, keep that in mind. She even said she was suicidal. How're you going to expect someone to make good/right decisions in that mindset? The farther she gets away from this, the more clearly she's going to see things. So please lets try to be understanding.

She can't change the past. I think it would be much more beneficial to focus on the present here.

Hava, I know you requested no more replies be made in the thread. I mean no disrespect to you by making this one. I just think there is some good here, and more could possibly come. If not, you do have the option of deleting it from your subscribed threads list, or just ignoring the thread.
I'm glad you're clinging to God. He is certainly going to see you through this. I know it's not going to be easy, but there is nothing that you can't handle with His help. I hope and pray He blesses you in ways you never even thought possible.

 

[Hava91]

I wasn't going to check this thread again, but something made me, and thank you....i don't know what else to say... I'm sorry for being confusing. thank you for understanding

 

[william54]

I am confused. Who started this thread? The 13 year old or the 20 year old,Hava91?

hello sherman is my name 24 my age can you ples come on skype william.sherman54

 

[xtinaz]

Dont underestimate the power of our God He works ALL things for good for those who love him Romans 8

Surrender and praise - what an amazing testimony you have to share for thousands of woman in the same predicament. xo