Just to Vent

May the Good Lord bless and guide you,
May He solve every problem with ease
May you never step wrong or falter
May you love and be strong in giving
May you heal and be forgiven
May be well and prosperous too.
May you love Jesus to bless and guide you
And may your blessed mother intercede for you.
May you understand and solve each problem
May you be taken kindly
May each be blessed by your presence
And may Gods light shine to illuminate the way.
For many are poor, forsaken and have no help and suffer.
May God heal them and help them too.
Amen.

Often opportunities pass by and you grapple with them when you catch them. But you get no sleep because you feel insecure and unsatisfied.
You doubt yourself but you realize it's not the worst. Fleeting moments draw your attention but it's never enough to pace you. But an angel carries you through the night letting you know things will be alright.
Sometimes things don't go the way you want and you keep fighting with yourself.
But sooner or later, you learn to be sure of God's love and that He is good and merciful.

Riches and treasures
Often one feels happy about life,
Not envious or treacherous
But how would one feel without riches or treasures?
I guess maybe relieved
Maybe grieved
Maybe forsaken
Maybe aggravated.
It puzzles me so
Why it grieves someone to give so little
When God is loving, merciful and giving
Trust in Him and may it yield
Treasures greater than any other for you and your loved ones.

Along the way
The friends I made
Knew me well
But a time comes when we must take over make our sole decisions and move forward
But there was one such boy who always stuck to himself.
He would love to help out and make jokes but mostly stayed away.
Often I would wonder what was bothering him but with due course I realized each has his cross to carry and it’s easy to say a lot of bad in frustration but it is better not to judge.
When we were partners at school, it was like talking with a wall and I used to remember who do you love from BSB to while away hours.
Well whatever it was, I hope he found his true path and is doing well. In the end he was nice enough to me and I wish him well.

The Elephant and the Ant
Acting up is hard to do,
When times are tough and demanding
But repressing will take its toll
And one must express what one is going through.
Sometimes faith seeps in
And tolerance seems low
So it is confusing on how to behave
But needs must be met,
And one can only hope and pray.
Like the the elephant can trample the ant
And the ant bite the elephant,
May we see the benefits of not overestimating our problems
And underestimating the strength, love, light, experience, understanding, and grace needed to solve them.

"non-fictional"

Ah, how the light comes through!
The darkness of night dissolves.
Images cast were merely illusions.
Messages conveyed were something else.
And now the day ushers in reason and understanding.

Ah, how the gold-and-blue splashes in like a fantasy, like heaven seeking earth!
The picture is clear. The darkness is gone.

Bedazzled, like a bad dream ruined by greater reality,
the questioning is answered. The questionable is revealed.

Uncharted waters learn their name.
The lost are found.

God is Alive.


[h=2]John 8:12[/h]
Chapter Parallel Compare


12 When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

Verse reference: NIV (https://www.biblestudytools.com/topical-verses/life-bible-verses/)

"Another plea, January '18"
--1/24/2018

Disclaimer: This was written as a prayer request, but it ends like a poem, so I placed the following in the "Just to Vent" thread. It is real. There is no allegory. It is a prayer, request, goal, and poem. It is my heart on January 2018. Thanks for those who will respect the message shared.

I pray that you help me to be really present with each person I meet. I know some people are distractions,
but there are many who are divinely sent. Help me to help these individuals, families, groups. It is not
that I hold the answers, or that I possess the skills, or that I am a good example. But I desire to
be really present, listening to whomever needs someone else to hear.

I think of "Horacio," and how his mother passed away shortly after he suffered a break-up.
I think of how busy I am and how he reaches out, beyond his pride, and how he signals for help.
But then how little I have contributed to offering comfort, other than words.
And my words are empty, filled with intentions... but often lacking true compassion.
I mean, I need to act with compassion, not just act like I have it.

Lord, I pray that you help me to be gracious whenever corrected. Help me not to be more foolish than I have been.
Rather, continue to correct my thoughts-- BEFORE-- unwise or sinful choices are said or made. Otherwise,
keep me quiet, like that "Thumper" saying goes, "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all" (Disney's Bambi). Yes, God, as your word says, "Even a fool, when quiet, appears wise." Therefore, do what you must-- in me.

Lord, I pray also for perseverance in that which is good or holy. Help me not to whine, complain, or fall away from enduring for the Hope I have in Christ and the Body of Christ (in You). Help me to find more and more reasons to praise you with sincerity and truth, love and peace. And to limit my complaints to you, or as advocacy for justice for others (interceding/praying/etc).

God, I confess my need for you is always greater than my reputation, words, and past success.
And it is Because of You, that I am at least this far in life. But I have so far to go, or so it feels.
And while I am not seeking to attain by my own strength, I can find times of doing just that.
And it is never for the Good. Rather, it might be said to be done for You-- when it is really self-deceit at work.

So, Lord, the real issue here is Deceit and Discipline. If I am deceived, blind to what is Your Will, thinking something evil is good-- then please open my eyes or save me from a more dangerous result (for self or others). And if I am lacking in obeying what You have said, or will Say, even in the area of faith-- I ask that you change this about me.

God, I want to love you more.
I need this, always.
And if I am going to present in this world,
I want to real, not fake.
I want to be listening, not rushing.
I want to help other endure, even as I am enduring...
with Hope, Joy, Faith, Love.

i admit my doubts.
i admit my faults.
i admit my desires.

Lord, we all need Your Will.
We need You today.

In Jesus' name, your will be done.
Amen.

"Another plea, January '18"
--1/24/2018

Disclaimer: This was written as a prayer request, but it ends like a poem, so I placed the following in the "Just to Vent" thread. It is real. There is no allegory. It is a prayer, request, goal, and poem. It is my heart on January 2018. Thanks for those who will respect the message shared.

I pray that you help me to be really present with each person I meet. I know some people are distractions,
but there are many who are divinely sent. Help me to help these individuals, families, groups. It is not
that I hold the answers, or that I possess the skills, or that I am a good example. But I desire to
be really present, listening to whomever needs someone else to hear.

I think of "Horacio," and how his mother passed away shortly after he suffered a break-up.
I think of how busy I am and how he reaches out, beyond his pride, and how he signals for help.
But then how little I have contributed to offering comfort, other than words.
And my words are empty, filled with intentions... but often lacking true compassion.
I mean, I need to act with compassion, not just act like I have it.

Lord, I pray that you help me to be gracious whenever corrected. Help me not to be more foolish than I have been.
Rather, continue to correct my thoughts-- BEFORE-- unwise or sinful choices are said or made. Otherwise,
keep me quiet, like that "Thumper" saying goes, "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all" (Disney's Bambi). Yes, God, as your word says, "Even a fool, when quiet, appears wise." Therefore, do what you must-- in me.

Lord, I pray also for perseverance in that which is good or holy. Help me not to whine, complain, or fall away from enduring for the Hope I have in Christ and the Body of Christ (in You). Help me to find more and more reasons to praise you with sincerity and truth, love and peace. And to limit my complaints to you, or as advocacy for justice for others (interceding/praying/etc).

God, I confess my need for you is always greater than my reputation, words, and past success.
And it is Because of You, that I am at least this far in life. But I have so far to go, or so it feels.
And while I am not seeking to attain by my own strength, I can find times of doing just that.
And it is never for the Good. Rather, it might be said to be done for You-- when it is really self-deceit at work.

So, Lord, the real issue here is Deceit and Discipline. If I am deceived, blind to what is Your Will, thinking something evil is good-- then please open my eyes or save me from a more dangerous result (for self or others). And if I am lacking in obeying what You have said, or will Say, even in the area of faith-- I ask that you change this about me.

God, I want to love you more.
I need this, always.
And if I am going to present in this world,
I want to real, not fake.
I want to be listening, not rushing.
I want to help other endure, even as I am enduring...
with Hope, Joy, Faith, Love.

i admit my doubts.
i admit my faults.
i admit my desires.

Lord, we all need Your Will.
We need You today.

In Jesus' name, your will be done.
Amen.

EDIT to the above:

God, I want to love you more.
I need this, always.
And if I am going to be present in this world,
then I want to be real, not fake.
I want to be listening, not rushing.
I want to help others endure, even as I am enduring...
with Hope, Joy, Faith, Love.
Yes,
i admit my doubts.
i admit my faults.
i admit my desires.

And,
Lord, we all need Your Will.
We need You today.

In Jesus' name, Your will be done.
Amen.

My One True Love
Beautiful eyes
And a great voice
Thanks to you
For being so nice.
Sometimes we cry
And fight a lot.
But we always realize
That blind we’re not.
Always keep me close,
In your heart
And pray to Jesus,
That we will never part.
All good things are His
Who is all good,
Praise, thank and follow Him,
We always should.

Even though things aren’t going so well in my life, God is still carrying on loving us.
I wished for things but I realize he has a greater purpose in mind.
Sometimes I feel depressed that I don’t have or I don’t know things but it is all for the better just to trust Him.
At times I feel silly and out of place but serving him just makes the world a better place.
We might not see it at first but we have to hope and pray in the Lord I guess.
Also sometimes things could be a lot worse, we have to appreciate what we have I guess.
At times I develop a temper and a apathy but I think God understands.
He knows we are just children to be carried on His shoulders to gently scold and correct and rejoice when we are good.

Thank you Lord for Your helping hand,
Please also help the less fortunate
And help us to be good children
Forgive our sins and have mercy on us.
We will always love you forever and ever.
Amen

Time flies
Time flies when your not with me
But remains when you’re close
I miss you when you’re away
But like to spend time with you.
Like the moon needs the stars,
I need you in my life.
But I miss the whispers of light you
Let fly ever so full of care.
Please help me and help us,
Be good and loving children Lord.
Give us good hearts and
Conquer all the evil.
Serve the weak, suffering and downtrodden,
And keep everyone close to you
All the time,
For your love sake,
Amen.

A Poem To Let Go Of The Anger & Upset.

I came here to spread joy,
I now am upset, near depressed.
I shared my heart, I was happy to,
The enemy thinks he's won.
The enemy is wrong!


ABBA Father, I call to YOU!
Help me LORD to be still,
And to know that YOU are GOD!
Fill me with YOUR peace,
Which surpasses all understanding.

I said my what was in my heart,
my passion is Love!
Love for YOUR Precious innocent creations.
I know that YOU understand this.
My Father, ABBA Father,
my GOD! xxx

Amen & Amen! <><<

Love,

Bella.

As-is





needs work... oh, well...

"Lenses"

I was hit.
Then someone drove off.
Then I was blind.
I learned to deal with it.
I was seen.
But I cannot make sense of my vision.
Someone frames.
Someone questions.
Someone leaves without answers.
Church supplies a place for conversation,
if not convenience.
The pastor points to the Word for direction,
to be resilient.
Someone requests.
Someone shares.
Someone prays.
God answers.
Amen?

Note:
The inspired story is simple.

New glasses were needed.
I went to church.
The pastor addressed some questions.
And God gave me "new" insight--
even as I waited to get newly framed prescription glasses.

Fun fact: the temporary glasses for sunlight were all black, except for the inside of the frames...
which were white...
question marks.

The pastor was preaching on ASK God and shared how even as his own daughter faces heart complications, he's decided to follow Jesus. He asking God for wisdom, healing, His Will. He has faith God can do a great work. And yet even as he had recent news of his daughter's health-- he opened by asking for prayer for others and turning the congregation to Scripture. Thereafter, but before prayer groups, I noticed the white question marks on the side of my frames.

What this says to me:
Sometimes we focus on the questions as something to be answered in a certain way...
but there are times when God wants to use the questions as part of the solution.
Most people saw flimsy glasses, or temporary glasses. I felt blind. But God knows
how my Sight is already being improved... Now, I wonder What's next
??_
__l


!Please pray for the pastor's faith and his daughter's heart (organ)!

Thanks. --IDEA

A rambling: take 29.
Again, unedited
likely not a poem.

Just letting some strangers out
Just then, a friend comes my way.
But before he enters, there is a solemn statement.
"She's gone."

Having been in their 80s, this was not huge news.
But it was worth knowing, learning,
that the other half was now in a different place.

Then he continued,
"she's in a nursing home."

Still stunned, shocked at how he missed her and how I missed the couple in their entirety,
I feverishly pitched, "Maybe I can swing by someday."
But my schedule did not look like I'd make it.

Fast-forward...
Today, someday, a few days later, I missed my turn because of a sweetheart story on the radio.

I was a was thirty minutes early, so I figured, "Hey, maybe I can make it to see D!"
Abut then i was met by traffic, one-lane, what-a-pain, slow-me-down-if-not-mow-me-down traffic.
And so time was pressing, as i pulled into the vacant spot of the lot, to see "Dot."

I was eager to grab my supplies, as I started improvising a comforting gift of encouragement.
I prayed, Lord, use this. And, no joke, I was awestruck by the fact that my friend was also
pulling in, greeting me, leading me to the right doors. (in this case, they were really the doors located to the right of the building.)

And then I was moved by the "daughter" and her own child and the love of the more-than-4 family.
I listened to some of the updates, I briefly listened to them figure out costs and procedures.
But the lasting impression is how they all exhibited peace in uncertainty. And how they loved reading the scriptures in two cards given (no, not mine).


Anyways, just as I opened the door for the one not so long ago,
my friends had invited me to join an impromptu celebration.

As if not cool enough, I then made it to my appointment on time.
...ironically, my timing was, you could say, right on the dot.

To God be the glory.
He used my error for His witness.

Oh. and what was shared on the radio was just as significant; proving worth a missed exit.

My God
My heart belongs to thee
O Lord of lords.
My souls strives to please thee.
My life is in thy hands
And my whole world too.
My desires and aspirations
Are to serve thee.
My sorrow is being separate
From thee.
My displeasure is displeasing thee.
My help is thee,
My Friend and Savior too.
I look to thee,
I love thee,
And need thee.
Please help thy child be a good girl,
And never displease thee,
And to be good to my brothers and sisters,
And all of your creation.
Amen

My Umbrella

Lord many times,
There’s rain in my life,
And I’m not prepared.
Temptations and weakness,
Ruin my outlook on being true to you.
Please show me the way,
Day by day,
To love you more closely,
Obey You more dearly,
And keep your creation in my heart more fondly,
So that I may be a drop in the ocean of Your love,
That pleases you.
Whenever I turn from You,
Lord, I’m sorry,
Please help me return and surrender to you with everything.
Thank you for your blessings and goodness.
I will always love you, my Strength, my Savior,
Forever and ever.
Amen.

Someone owes me,
or so I am tempted to feel.
But, Lord, I am someone who owes.

During this time of Easter,
many will chide those who celebrate the cross and resurrection,
mocking believers, even if in the unsaid corridors of the heart.

But they misunderstand; my greatest debt is covered by these events.
And while they pity apparent delusion, they are equally poor, needing forgiveness.

And while I want to hold my anger over one's deceit,
the Bible says that the human heart is self-deceived; that is, if not led by a truth-revealing God.

Therefore, knowing how the Lord has shown me my Fault and His Forgiveness,
I choose to overlook what offends me, entrusting it to God Almighty.

Prayer:
Lord, help me to overcome evil with godliness.
And where there is sin or any hint of it today, do what you will in me.
I ask this is Jesus' name, amen.

Happy Easter to you and your families.

Prayer to Risen Jesus
Light that shone and shaped my life,
Led to Christian love and faith
Made the sick, sinners, old and young, glad,
Saved us from sin and set us free.
God of all and Christ Almighty,
Make us good,
Bless us with wisdom to know right from wrong,
To do all things according to Your will,
Help us be good like You,
And keep all the poor and unfortunate close to you,
Bless us all and help us be good.
Bless all the souls may they all rejoice in Heaven,
With all Your people.
Bless all your creation,
May they rejoice in Heaven too.

Late, under one tar-sodden sky,
a wayfaring figure stepped into found light.
The dark's tear in seams brought day into night.
Revealing a climb up pit-fallen heights.

Slight, past the hours on watch,
two strode together while befuddled in thought.
They sloshed through the oil, clothes were covered a lot.
No water to wash in; but, hey, there was Dawn-- ..not.

................
Which path to choose,
which car to drive;
which streets to avoid to stay alive?
When lanes are busy,
then on which side should one reside?
Or Is it safe to weave; moreover, is it wise?
Or is it better to walk than ride?
Man, how does anyone not collide?
With all of the factors that are quick to hit,
run-you-over, and hide!
I guess the answer is to stay inside.
But did you not hear about how kids are starting to fly?
Talk about getting high!
There's less time to hear them.
or to see them.
Forget about the weekend cruise.
Now it is the diverless that snags the views,
today's teen is app-chatting while drone-shooting
global news.
Yay, more options from which to choose!
And yet I am still looking for some right-fit shoes.
Wait, what if that's the a clue.
I need a driverless, flying, drone-type shoe--
to capture the speed of Nike,
a versatile triple-threat.
and I need the surpassing greatness of an underdog who wins the mega match.
But what good is it to have the right idea,
the right capabilities?
If just doing less seems like so much more?
Still, that is the answer.
Stronger than steel--
like superman-- but real.
I need to be still.
This does not mean slacking in what's conducive.
Rather, I need to be attentive to what's Spoken.
Automated replies, bots, and whatnots--
They are not the cream of the crop--

Okay,
Okay,
Whenever I'm Called, I'll stop trying and choosing.

God, wherever you want me, help me in what you want me to be doing.

-----
First reflection is inspired by a dead fan that started working... It inspired the first part. The second part was inspired by equally lifeless humor... not. The second reflection was me writing without a road-map. And look where it got us!

Finally,
I hope your decisions and actions are to the glory of God, and not for the praises of man-- including oneself.
Additionally, I am no authority on the subjects mentioned. So who cares what I "hope."

--IDEA
July 10 2018