Dating apps?

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ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
1,311
113
30
Arizona
#22
An interesting thing too is that with some sites it can actually be the opposite problem. I was on one for a while that was called christian dating for free, and I got INUNDATED with messages constantly. Most from people were from other countries looking for a wife from the states I guess?? There were also many who would totally ignore my things I was looking for and NOT looking for in my profile. (Probably hadn't read it at all most likely.)
 
L

LittleMermaid

Guest
#23
I don't think it's wrong at all. If you feel comfortable then go for it! I've never tried it myself because I was hoping for a relationship to start off on its own. I don't have anyone in mind but I want to be friends with a guy and then we both fall deeply, madly in love with each other! Because that's totally realistic, right? :unsure::geek:
But seriously, if I keep getting old and no one comes along, I might try the online dating thing.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
11,620
4,203
113
#24
No not for me. This was a couple of years ago so they didnt have APPS then.
I tried...christian single, that was terrible, and cos it was free, all sorts of weirdos, hunting down christian women.
The other one was findsomeone, it wasnt christian though people could say they were and that was meant to be local, but had two dates and then gave up, cos got lots of harassing messages that put me off.

Maybe if I persisted I might have had better experiences but you dont when you go out with someone who has a criminal record and then has to go to rehab and steals your eftpos card....

God are you trying to tell me something??

I think there was one other one i cant remember the name of and it was populated by catholics and missionaries you know the super churchy people. There would be no way I'd be a good match for them.


So a no, but my cousin in canada did meet their other half on one called christian cafe and they married and had a family and its been 17 years so...maybe the online matchmakers in canada are better.

I saw a movie called Christian Mingle in which the heroine PRETENDED to be a christian ...and THEN found God after she met her match. But the guy didnt suspect she was pretending? It was quite a funny movie but...I dont think it works the other way round it would be a completely different movie and possibly a horror one if it was the guy pretending and the girl who was the christian.
 

Princesse

Active member
Feb 16, 2020
259
123
43
#26
I have never used an app or dating site. But if I did it would be a service whose cost and vetting would weed out the dross. There is no way I would subject myself to random messages from every person who called themselves a Christian. That isn’t a wise use of time.

Oftentimes you get what you pay for. When services are free or too affordable you attract a demographic that wouldn’t bother if you raised the price. I see the same in business courses. The quality of participants and their contribution significantly improves as costs increase.

You want prospects whose sincerity and readiness are evident. That doesn’t guarantee perfection. But it does suppose you’re engaging with a suitor committed to finding a companion. Not a window shopper.

Raise the needle and the haystack shrinks.
 

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
Dec 8, 2014
540
129
43
#27
I have never used an app or dating site. But if I did it would be a service whose cost and vetting would weed out the dross. There is no way I would subject myself to random messages from every person who called themselves a Christian. That isn’t a wise use of time.

Oftentimes you get what you pay for. When services are free or too affordable you attract a demographic that wouldn’t bother if you raised the price. I see the same in business courses. The quality of participants and their contribution significantly improves as costs increase.

You want prospects whose sincerity and readiness are evident. That doesn’t guarantee perfection. But it does suppose you’re engaging with a suitor committed to finding a companion. Not a window shopper.

Raise the needle and the haystack shrinks.
Really? that is so true, you know that is probably the wisest thing I have ever heard regarding online dating. Yeah, I know, I wish I had that advice when I was younger, probably would have saved me a lot of time, money and headaches.
 

Princesse

Active member
Feb 16, 2020
259
123
43
#28
Really? that is so true, you know that is probably the wisest thing I have ever heard regarding online dating. Yeah, I know, I wish I had that advice when I was younger, probably would have saved me a lot of time, money and headaches.
We’ve all encountered talkers of every stripe and others whose actions and investment demonstrate their commitment and seriousness. And in this medium, you have no ability to substantiate their claims without time and discernment. Anyone can say they’re a believer. Character becomes the litmus through which you gauge their faith.

The bigger problem is the absence of the appropriate scrutiny in the discussion. You must consider his suitability as a companion and if he’s addressing the qualities you need in a healthy relationship. When there’s too much intimacy we’re moving from discernment and allowing our emotions to take the reins.

You have to do your homework beforehand to understand the climate you’re dealing with and the challenges Christian men are facing. What is the consensus? What are single men emphasizing? What is their struggle? You learn to speak their language to address the nitty gritty truths which go unuttered.

When you lead with those subjects you gain greater insight into him and will elicit a better response. If he senses you get him and your demeanor isn’t abrasive he’ll open up. You can’t go under the hood without understanding what you’re looking for.

Many men are lonely. Misunderstood. And yearning for someone who believes in them. They feel unwanted. Unneeded. And invisible.

That’s an easy fix.

But the caveat is recognizing the pearl (you) comes in many guises. You have to understand your nature to recognize those who’d value you because they’re looking for the same and so are you. If you know the problem you can understand the remedy needed and your suitability for the job.

You won’t fit every man and nor will he. You’ll both resonate with certain types and less so with others. And that’s the patch you pick from. You won’t value the jewel if you don’t recognize its luster and know its identity. Otherwise it’s just a funny rock.

That works for me. But it isn’t the only way. :)
 

oksana123

New member
Feb 16, 2020
23
17
3
#29
I think it depends on the person. I've had some good experiences. I met a good people online and got to know them but things didn't work out because I realized we're too different. But I personally know several people who met online and are still married so I think it works for some people.
 

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
Dec 8, 2014
540
129
43
#30
We’ve all encountered talkers of every stripe and others whose actions and investment demonstrate their commitment and seriousness. And in this medium, you have no ability to substantiate their claims without time and discernment. Anyone can say they’re a believer. Character becomes the litmus through which you gauge their faith.

The bigger problem is the absence of the appropriate scrutiny in the discussion. You must consider his suitability as a companion and if he’s addressing the qualities you need in a healthy relationship. When there’s too much intimacy we’re moving from discernment and allowing our emotions to take the reins.

You have to do your homework beforehand to understand the climate you’re dealing with and the challenges Christian men are facing. What is the consensus? What are single men emphasizing? What is their struggle? You learn to speak their language to address the nitty gritty truths which go unuttered.

When you lead with those subjects you gain greater insight into him and will elicit a better response. If he senses you get him and your demeanor isn’t abrasive he’ll open up. You can’t go under the hood without understanding what you’re looking for.

Many men are lonely. Misunderstood. And yearning for someone who believes in them. They feel unwanted. Unneeded. And invisible.

That’s an easy fix.

But the caveat is recognizing the pearl (you) comes in many guises. You have to understand your nature to recognize those who’d value you because they’re looking for the same and so are you. If you know the problem you can understand the remedy needed and your suitability for the job.

You won’t fit every man and nor will he. You’ll both resonate with certain types and less so with others. And that’s the patch you pick from. You won’t value the jewel if you don’t recognize its luster and know its identity. Otherwise it’s just a funny rock.

That works for me. But it isn’t the only way. :)
Amen.