1. Are you male? If so, move on to question 2. If not, fold this form into a crane and give it to someone who is.
2. Are you rich? If so, go to the next question. if not, fold this form into a paper airplane and fly it to someone who is.
3. Are you handsome? If so, move on to the next question. If not. put this form in an envelope and mail it to someone who is.
4. Can you tolerate my terrible singing 24 hours a day?
5. Do you mind that I only shave my legs once a month?
If you answered yes to each of these questions, run to the nearest shoe store and buy me a hamburger.