engagement proposal confusion...engaged but not proposed to..yet suprised??

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J0Y

J0Y

Senior Member
#21
Mar 7, 2009
509
6
18
#21
hmmm, interesting thread.....
I am a lover of surprises!!! (good ones lol) So the idea of talking about the details of marriage between me and a guy would be like "putting the cart before the horse." I mean, sure, the marriage topic would be raised at some point quite casually, kinda like 'if we ever got married ......' but as for having our lives mapped out before he has proposed....no! LOL. Call me old fashioned....but it just doesnt sit right to me. However, bearing in mind that all girls and guys are different so therefore, different strokes for different folks!
 
L

Leilaii425

Guest
#22
#22
I want it all to be a big surprise!! like.. We've been dating for two months BAM.... WILL YOU MARRY ME!!!!

THAT IS A BAD SURPRISE.


 
K

kiwi_OT

Guest
#23
#23
It seriously hurt my head reading that conversation of yours.. Your right it makes no sense.. Sounds like a really confusing way of doing it.
Though I can understand why she wanted to not state they were officially engaged til he had done the whole shebang properly. I think women hold too much at stake for the men to get it right. A lot of women want the perfect proposal, they want to control the circumstances in which it happens, its all about them - apparently.
Personally I could not do that.. If a guy wants to propse to me - go ahead, so long as its imaginative and makes me laugh and smile Im happy. Though in reality engaged couples should focus more on the marriage bit and not the ring/wedding/dress/colours/inlaw stress lol
 
M

Matthew

Guest
#24
#24
I've always thought the reason the proposal is such a treasured memory is because it is a surprise, possibly the best surprise a woman will ever get depending on how the man goes about it, so I don't understand how it would still mean something having known it was coming.

I would never commit to marriage in a conversation with my partner, I would deliberatly avoid a specific conversation on the topic so that my proposal was as unique and special a moment as I could make it, to me having that conversation is like sneaking a look at your christmas present, you may still want it but it means so much less than it would have.
 
K

kiwi_OT

Guest
#25
#25
missy2shoes said:
Hey good stuff :).....I guess the appeal for some women is getting to choose the ring they want before hand.....in the movies when the guy surprises them with a ring and the girl goes....'OH I LOVEEEEEE it!!!!'......I've often wondered if she actually does or if she really thinks it looks hideous and makes her finger look fat :p
Click to expand...
YES!! I completely agree with this! The trick is guys is to ask their mums. That way your garrenteed to know its what she wants unless of course their not close to their mums.
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#26
May 23, 2009
16,682
5,596
113
#26
I've been laughing so hard at these posts because... well... they're just all so true... I guess nowadays it seems as if the word "proposal" really means "stage production to make public announcement that includes huge, honkin' ring in order to impress the public with information the couple and everyone else has known about for weeks/months/years."
 
C

ChristopherMichael

Guest
#27
#27
Sounds like the guy was being a wuss. Probably didn't want to risk rejection, or maybe he just doesn't care about her too much. If you care about your girl, you'll treat her right! Part of that is going about marriage the right way, so she feels special and not ashamed at all about doing things out of order. If a girl loves a guy, sometimes she'll make a lot of compromises that she says she's OK with, but let her down inside. She probably feels that way about her engagement.

- Topher
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#28
#28
seoulsearch said:
I've been laughing so hard at these posts because... well... they're just all so true... I guess nowadays it seems as if the word "proposal" really means "stage production to make public announcement that includes huge, honkin' ring in order to impress the public with information the couple and everyone else has known about for weeks/months/years."
Click to expand...
It's like announcing a surprise party to a person who's having a birthday, then demanding they act surprised when they walk through the door.
 
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