Good Christian Guys

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living4him95

Guest
#1
Ahh! It is so hard for me to find a good, Christian guy to date. Every guy I've ever met and even wanted to or have come close to dating is just like the rest of the non-christian guys I know. They lie, cheat, and steal just like anyone else would. I can't find anyone who loves me for me and not someone who wants to use me and lie to me. I'm starting to give up the male species. What to do? What to do?
 
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sportygirl

Guest
#2
Well don't give up, thats for sure! There are good christian guys out there, yes there are the bad ones as well, ive dated two of those, along iwth that everyone makes mistakes even the good christian guys. (the Same is true for christian girls to) Your also young, in high school or middle school (even college sometimes) guys arent mature yet, and some arent true christians they go to youth group because of their parents or out of habit but arent necessarily strong in their faith. I would say pray about it and just focus on being guys friends for a while, developing a friendship is important and helps you weed out the "bad" guys before things get to serious. The further you get into high school and than college the more likely you are to meet hose christian guys that are true christians, and not just in name.

Dating isnt necessarily a priority in high school, or even college, yes dating is fun. But patience and trust in God is important and you'll be thanful you did, or at least thats true from my experience. I didnt have my first real date till I was 18, first real boyfriend at 19. And am just now at almost 21 learning what a real relationship is, and all of those weren't.
 
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Lalilo

Guest
#3
Patience is a virtue I wish I had developed sooner. Because the pace of life in the develop world has speed up we have grown accustom to thing happening when we want them to happen. Somehow I don't thing God rushes for anything or anyone.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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#4
Ahh! It is so hard for me to find a good, Christian guy to date. Every guy I've ever met and even wanted to or have come close to dating is just like the rest of the non-christian guys I know. They lie, cheat, and steal just like anyone else would. I can't find anyone who loves me for me and not someone who wants to use me and lie to me. I'm starting to give up the male species. What to do? What to do?
Hey i saw you in chat today. i hope you are feeling better! Pray for protection when things seem to be going badly. It really works. Take care :)
 

jangel

Senior Member
May 12, 2010
487
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#5
Just so funny for me, we people are always looking for something to fill the void that we have in ourselves , even though we know that only God can fill it we still cry for something, we may know Him but we never really learn how to trust Him. We are so concern to meet our partner, to be right for that person.
I wonder if God will talk to us, I think He will say… Do you think I like you to be my bride? ugh…that hurts most!:( Anyway...

It’s because we are surrounded with non Christian people, and most of our time is spent with them. I never dated any Christian guys yet, but so far the non Christian guys that I’m with are responsible and nice.
The problem is, there’s nothing they can do than to bring you to bars… movie theatre most of the times…treat you to watch a game…go to this romantic place…got to the point where it bores me really. I’m still waiting for someone who will ask you out but surprisingly will bring you to the church and will tell you… alright, here we are , lets join the prayer meeting tonight!... or the fellowship meeting…that would really be so funny but that guy would really knocked me off.:D

But seeing you’re 14, I was in my junior high at that time, girl you still have a lot of things to discover in this silly world, don’t rush on things. I would say, I never had any experience with guys at all, till I started working.
Teen days are scary but at the same time fun for me…a lot of things we are not allowed to do, need to be home before the night came. tsk ..tsk…
My sister had her 1st bf at age 18 , she was in sophomore in college , but when my dad knew it…it’s all over.
My dad is like this ,… as long as you're living in my roof, you have to follow me…but I understand why my dad was like that, and it paid off…be someone that they can be proud of also. Enjoy your teen years without thinking of having relationships, am sure you’ll appreciate it more than worrying to find someone in your life.:)
 

Crypto

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2009
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#6
You're 14! Why give your heart to immature boys who will just hurt you and scar you emotionally for life?
 
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Matthew

Guest
#7
I'm starting to give up the male species. What to do? What to do?
With all due respect I'll make the point that at 14 years old you will not have had any real contact with the male species in dating terms, but rather the subset known as boys, the two are very different. ;)

At 14 years old you cannot expect mature behaviour in a relationship from a boy or from yourself, you shouldn't even be 'looking for love', and quite frankly the behaviour you've described is very much the norm at that age....for both genders.
 
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living4him95

Guest
#8
Guys, I'm much more mature than you know. I've experienced things most adults haven't experienced. I can understand the whole "not dating" thing. But, as jangel said I guess I just need something to fill that void in my life.
 
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Matthew

Guest
#9
Guys, I'm much more mature than you know. I've experienced things most adults haven't experienced.
Experiences do not equal maturity.....they equal knowledge.....and knowledge doesn't equal wisdom.....so the value of experience alone is relatively minor.

An adult could have experienced much less and be a lot more mature than a teenager who has experienced a lot, it's more about personality than anything else and at 14 your personality is still developing...no matter what you think or say.

Real maturity is in recognising and accepting these facts and embracing your life as it is, not reaching for what is quite naturally beyond you.
 

Crypto

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2009
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#10
Experiences do not equal maturity.....they equal knowledge.....and knowledge doesn't equal wisdom.....so the value of experience alone is relatively minor.

An adult could have experienced much less and be a lot more mature than a teenager who has experienced a lot, it's more about personality than anything else and at 14 your personality is still developing...no matter what you think or say.

Real maturity is in recognising and accepting these facts and embracing your life as it is, not reaching for what is quite naturally beyond you.
Totally right. Maturity comes through life as a whole, not experiences.
 
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sportygirl

Guest
#11
Guys, I'm much more mature than you know. I've experienced things most adults haven't experienced. I can understand the whole "not dating" thing. But, as jangel said I guess I just need something to fill that void in my life.
You may be mature but that doesnt mean your ready to date, and even if you are the other people your age arent. I was just talking to my friend about a 14 year old dating an 18 year old. Please dont become that girl. I agree with something to fill that void and that void should be filled by God. I would recommend reading Authentic Beauty it is a fantastic book, and shows how god can fill your life in those areas.
 
Jul 8, 2010
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#12
im sorry at 14 youre simply too young to be dating in my mind. Too young, too immature regardless of your personal opinion, and no real idea what you really want in life, much less what you really need.
 
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Mery30

Guest
#13
Just wait on the Lord =)
 

eugenius

Senior Member
Jul 17, 2009
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#14
I have nearly given up on the female species for the same reason that you have nearly given up on the male species. Perhaps the problem is not male or female. The problem is most people in teens and 20s in general, and modern culture.
 

AsifinPassing

Senior Member
Jul 13, 2010
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#15
Ahh! It is so hard for me to find a good, Christian guy to date. Every guy I've ever met and even wanted to or have come close to dating is just like the rest of the non-christian guys I know. They lie, cheat, and steal just like anyone else would. I can't find anyone who loves me for me and not someone who wants to use me and lie to me. I'm starting to give up the male species. What to do? What to do?
I'm very sorry that this has been the experience in your life. I would like to tell you that there are good guys out there who never do those things, which is possible, but the semi-harsh reality is that Christian or not, we are all broken and sinful. Paul says we all sin and fall short of the glory of God, but it's okay, because through Christ we can be changed to go on to perfection.

Now, all that being said, I'd like to encourage you not to give up on pretty much anything. Giving up is generally not good...

Pray and seek God as to these things in your life. He's the One that gives you love, peace, truth, fulfillment, and all these other things everyone is looking for but seem to have trouble finding.

However, if you're like me or others that have come to this understanding, yet still have the desire for a spouse, continue to put God first, and I'm sure if in His plan, you will find a good Christian man later on.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#16
Your 14. You've been looking for what.. 1 year?? Wait till you get to be my age.. then you can ask where are they
 
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asamanthinketh

Guest
#20
Well, in my experience the sad reality is that no guys may never change into what you expect or what the Lord wants. but you have a lifetime to work at it.

But you're life matters. So, enjoy it, and know that guys do see behind appearances, but their are hard decisions in life