OH WHATEVER, Nod!!
You apparently have eyes that are so stunning no one can believe they're real (uh, that reminds me of the time a girl ASKED ME IF I HAD BREAST IMPLANTS... no joke... but um... not because I have anything stunningly unnatural-looking, I don't think!!!)
And THEN, you claim to have bad hair... you probably wake up every morning and look like you've had it professionally blown-out and set by a Hollywood hairstylist...
No need for false modesty here, Nod--you can flaunt away.
*Rounds up Dread and makes plans to ambush Nod for being so enviably perfect.*