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May I use the example of Ruth -
She didnt harrass, stalk or nag Boaz to ask her out, but she did put herself in front of him so to speak. The dude was a lovely caring Godly business man who had only ever seen her grubby and working hard in the fields. He saw her awesome character and commended it but didnt see anything more til she got some female advice, got dolled up and put herself in his way and proposed that he propose to her. I agree that men are the ones who should pursue but man oh man do they need some help! They cant do it on their own! If they could the female race would be figured out and we know thats not going to happen any time soon.
So, give them a hand, drop a few hints until he either says clearly "Ok I get it, wanna go for coffee?" or "Im sorry, Im not interested." If he says neither then hes not too bright or hes a coward whose trying to avoid your point and you shouldnt bother.
To answer your other question about casual dating - I think you got it mixed up. The type of casual dating godly christians frown upon is the dating where the intent of the date is purely for your own selfishness (casual sex usually follows after), the casual date you described is what we call the first date as what it should be in the first place. A time to guard your heart but be curious about the other person and casually get to know them in a friendly non scary environment (preferably with other people around you for support and mutual space).
Hope that helps
She didnt harrass, stalk or nag Boaz to ask her out, but she did put herself in front of him so to speak. The dude was a lovely caring Godly business man who had only ever seen her grubby and working hard in the fields. He saw her awesome character and commended it but didnt see anything more til she got some female advice, got dolled up and put herself in his way and proposed that he propose to her. I agree that men are the ones who should pursue but man oh man do they need some help! They cant do it on their own! If they could the female race would be figured out and we know thats not going to happen any time soon.
So, give them a hand, drop a few hints until he either says clearly "Ok I get it, wanna go for coffee?" or "Im sorry, Im not interested." If he says neither then hes not too bright or hes a coward whose trying to avoid your point and you shouldnt bother.
To answer your other question about casual dating - I think you got it mixed up. The type of casual dating godly christians frown upon is the dating where the intent of the date is purely for your own selfishness (casual sex usually follows after), the casual date you described is what we call the first date as what it should be in the first place. A time to guard your heart but be curious about the other person and casually get to know them in a friendly non scary environment (preferably with other people around you for support and mutual space).
Hope that helps