PLOT TWIST...

[AsifinPassing]

"Please pay attention to your flight attendants and on-board screens for a brief instructional video of the safety procedures used on this flight."

Thinking his PA had cut off and that the video was playing, the Captain began grumbling to ground control.

"What do you mean I have no co-pilot for this trip?! This is against regulations, and where are we supposed to land for refueling?! More than half of the ports along our route are covered in ice from blizzards right now!"

With uncomfortable silence and alarm having filled the cabin, Janice (one of the flight attendants) decided to reassure everyone by...

 

[GodIsSalvation]

As Janice the stewardess was handing out packets of peanuts suddenly fighter jets came screaming across the sky out of nowhere and surrounded the airplane. A steely voice entered the airplane demanding it to land. Janice reassured the panicked passengers as the plane rerouted.

The plane landed safely in Rio de Janeiro. Noble the lowly gardner looked out the window and saw Brazilian stormtroopers amassing outside on the runway.

"Well maybe we can catch a connecting flight to the Himalayas to help Sir Tintin this way" Lynx's voice pondered in Noble's mind.

"I wouldn't be so sure" Noble whispered discreetly to his furry friend in the guise of thermal gloves. "Brazil has recently been conquered by a dictator named Oditador. To make matters worse their new dictator, Oditador, has gone missing just after his wedding night and the place is in a sudden panic and on high alert. This doesn't look good."

"Maybe you could turn them into scarves and hats." Lynx laughed.

"It don't work like that..." Noble began but before he could finish his thought the Brazilian military stormtroopers of the new regime of Oditador the dictator entered the plane.......

 

[Lynx]

When suddenly... Tintin woke up.

What? Of course it was all a dream. That's one of the oldest plot twist devices in existence and nobody has used it one single time yet in this thread. The whole story to this point was all a dream Tintin was having.

 

[GodIsSalvation]

When suddenly... Tintin woke up.

What? Of course it was all a dream. That's one of the oldest plot twist devices in existence and nobody has used it one single time yet in this thread. The whole story to this point was all a dream Tintin was having.

Relieved at thinking it was all a dream Tintin walked downstairs as he would any other normal day. Except something startled him. A kindly old Nepalese man was waiting for him, and the house was not his house at all. One good twist deserving another and the twist in the plot to Dallas-spoil the plotline was foiled. The hero's sudden amnesia!

"We found you passed out on the side of the road and decided to bring you in. You were sick with a fever and out of it for days but praise Jesus the fever broke last night and you are all better now." The kindly old man said in perfect English.

"W-where am I?" Tintin blurted out.

"You're in Nepal. I'm sorry I don't know much about you. What's your name?" the old man smiled back.

"Oh..er.. I'm Tintin, nice to meet ya." Tintin smiled back. "Now why am I in Nepal?" Tintin struggled to remember having slight amnesia from his fever.

"Heh heh" the old man chuckled. "You were saying something about saving the world and something about some type of flower in your sleep. You seem just a good hearted man, perhaps you are looking for something?"

"Oh yea the rare blue flower said to grow in Himalaya needed to restore peace to the world." Tintin brightly exclaimed and remembered, but then sighed "but then the blue flower I was looking for doesn't grow in the Himalayas, there was a blue flower, but it was the wrong blue flower ."

"Well don't worry young Tintin, I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for." The old man patted him on his shoulder reassuringly.

"Thanks. Say what was you name?" Tintin asked the old man.

"Oh, my name is Jack." the old man smiled.

 

[Lynx]

"Jack?" said Tintin.

"Yes, I'm Jack Black. I came here to retire. I've had enough excitement for several lifetimes. Now I just want some peace and quiet to meditate on life."

Suddenly...

 

[Abing]

Bahaha this is getting good. Suddenly... (I'll cut the scene here because...)

Meanwhile in NYC, the land of the superheroes and earth-savers, people are celebrating and thanking Roh and Lynx for saving the world from the pony aliens.

Poor Tintin had no idea what was going on. If only Jack Black had internet and/or tv, or even a phone! But his inner peace mantra required him to cut all access to the real world.

EDIT: Yeah well the plot twist here is no plot twist.

 

[crosstweed]

Meanwhile in Kansas, a farmer ploughed a twisted plot...

 

[Siberian_Khatru]

Meanwhile in Kansas, a farmer ploughed a twisted plot...

Until his band mates needed him for a show - for you see, he was no farm boy at heart, but a "wayward son" that could carry on no longer.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Then came the rain the farmer ran to find shelter then stumbled into some kind of a portal and in a blink of an eye he found himself staring at the Eiffel tower...

 

[Roh_Chris]

Then came the rain the farmer ran to find shelter then stumbled into some kind of a portal and in a blink of an eye he found himself staring at the Eiffel tower...

But this was not the Eiffel tower that we know of, for in this portal, everything is the opposite of its original on earth. So, the farmer found himself staring at a tower that did not even reach up to his ankles!

 

[GodIsSalvation]

Meanwhile back in World 1 Brazil, Noble the gardner and the passengers from the flight had been debriefed by the Brazilian stormtrooper army that all flight in and out of Brazil would be suspended until the dictator Oditador was located. Until then the passengers would be confined to the airport terminal and would be given a free flight to the destination of their choice once plotline conflicts were resolved. So Noble kicked back in an uncomfortable chair and watched the news. He saw on the news the celebrations in New York City after the recent defeat of nefarious space ponies and saw the Mayor of New York presenting Roh and Lynx with a medal.

"Wait how can you be here and be there at the same time Lynx?" Noble whispered to his thermal gloves.

"Oh therrre are many Lynx, yes, purrrrr, many Lynx. That one is my brotherrrr Lynx." Lynx purred.

"Wait so what's your name?" Noble pondered.

"Oh, purr-purr, I am Links." the lynx purred telepathically.

"So you're all named Lynx?" Noble asked misinterpreting the response.

"No, I'm Links, he's Lynx, then therrrre's my brotherrrs Linx, Linqs, Leenks, Lingks. Lyncks....."

"Okay okay, I get it." Noble began.

Suddenly... on the tv screen a pillar of light shot down covering the Empire State Building. A bright flash also encompassed Rio de Janeiro startling the airport terminal and making everyone duck to the ground. After a moment every slowly started to rise. Looking outside a pillar of light had encompassed the famous Christ the Redeemer statue and it was growing and shrinking rapidly over and over.

"What is happening?" Links' voice asked.

"The Narrators, they have opened an alternative world, but their plotlines are too unstable. Now all major setting points in World 1 and World 2 are connecting. If they don't close this plot hole soon World 1 and World 2 will merge." Noble said grimly.

"What happens if they merrrge?" Links questioned purring.

"I don't know, could mean anything, maybe the worlds will cancel each other out or maybe it means a lot more plot twists, but it probably doesn't mean anything good. We have to get out of this terminal first and foremost though." Noble explained and looked around thinking of a plot twist to escape from the terminal.

 

[crosstweed]

Meanwhile back in World 1 Brazil, Noble the gardner and the passengers from the flight had been debriefed by the Brazilian stormtrooper army that all flight in and out of Brazil would be suspended until the dictator Oditador was located. Until then the passengers would be confined to the airport terminal and would be given a free flight to the destination of their choice once plotline conflicts were resolved. So Noble kicked back in an uncomfortable chair and watched the news. He saw on the news the celebrations in New York City after the recent defeat of nefarious space ponies and saw the Mayor of New York presenting Roh and Lynx with a medal.

"Wait how can you be here and be there at the same time Lynx?" Noble whispered to his thermal gloves.

"Oh therrre are many Lynx, yes, purrrrr, many Lynx. That one is my brotherrrr Lynx." Lynx purred.

"Wait so what's your name?" Noble pondered.

"Oh, purr-purr, I am Links." the lynx purred telepathically.

"So you're all named Lynx?" Noble asked misinterpreting the response.

"No, I'm Links, he's Lynx, then therrrre's my brotherrrs Linx, Linqs, Leenks, Lingks. Lyncks....."

"Okay okay, I get it." Noble began.

Suddenly... on the tv screen a pillar of light shot down covering the Empire State Building. A bright flash also encompassed Rio de Janeiro startling the airport terminal and making everyone duck to the ground. After a moment every slowly started to rise. Looking outside a pillar of light had encompassed the famous Christ the Redeemer statue and it was growing and shrinking rapidly over and over.

"What is happening?" Links' voice asked.

"The Narrators, they have opened an alternative world, but their plotlines are too unstable. Now all major setting points in World 1 and World 2 are connecting. If they don't close this plot hole soon World 1 and World 2 will merge." Noble said grimly.

"What happens if they merrrge?" Links questioned purring.

"I don't know, could mean anything, maybe the worlds will cancel each other out or maybe it means a lot more plot twists, but it probably doesn't mean anything good. We have to get out of this terminal first and foremost though." Noble explained and looked around thinking of a plot twist to escape from the terminal.

Noble quite suddenly contracted a case of Terminal Illness, probably brought on by that Airport McDonald's sammich he ate earlier...

 

[Born_Again]

Noble quite suddenly contracted a case of Terminal Illness, probably brought on by that Airport McDonald's sammich he ate earlier...

He described the feeling as intestinal lightning.

 

[Lynx]

So he drank some white lightning to counteract it (killed off the intestinal bugs, y'know) and staggered away happily.

Unfortunately felines of all kinds find alcohol extremely unpleasant. So Lynx was none too pleased when Noble spilled some of the stuff on his gloves. Not to mention Noble's breath, which was nowhere near noble.

 

[Roh_Chris]

So he drank some white lightning to counteract it (killed off the intestinal bugs, y'know) and staggered away happily.

Unfortunately felines of all kinds find alcohol extremely unpleasant. So Lynx was none too pleased when Noble spilled some of the stuff on his gloves. Not to mention Noble's breath, which was nowhere near noble.

And so Noble staggered forward and it seemed that for those few hours he had forgotten about the struggles of Tintin.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Savannah, a secret meeting was in progress. The great evil warlord sat upon her high throne and peered over her crooked nose as her minions hatched up plots to conquer the world. Little did she know that they were not minions, but millions of ants crawling in and out of their anthills.

 

[GodIsSalvation]

The evil warlord sorceress of the Savannah, Malkia-chungu, cackled in glee at her ant colony. Using her infernal magic she transported the colony to a nearby spire of light connecting Worlds 1 and 2. Using her diabolical sorceries she twisted the power of the cable of light between the worlds to make the ants grow in size varying between that of a small dog to a man. The spire of light connecting the two worlds glowed red at the tainting of its energy. The defiled cable of light flickered and then burst causing an earthquake and leaving a crater where the spire of light once touched the ground. The sorceress laughed vilely and casting a bewitchment over her giant ant army set out on her nefarious plan to conquer the world.

At the same time in New York City Roh and Lynx were looking up at the Empire State Building enveloped in a spire of light and pondering what it all meant and what plot twist would be in store for them next?

Find out next time on PLOT TWIST...

 

[Lynx]

Unfortunately for the evil genius, the moon was not made of cheddar cheese (sorry Dr. Doolittle) but instead was filled with a strong insecticide. And magic, an unstable power source if there ever was one, somehow teleported the resized ants right into the center of the moon, killing them all.

But it was just as well, because Dr. Dimension and his horde of animated coconuts were trying to take over the world too. If too many tried to take over the world there wouldn't be enough world to take over.

 

[GodIsSalvation]

Malkia-chungu the evil sorceress flew into a rage seeing her ant army destroyed so easily by the evil Dr. Dimension. The two began to battle furiously high in the air destroying mountains in their wake. Realizing that she could not overpower the evil doctor, she used her powers to turn the animated coconuts on their master. Dr. Dimension laughed having anticipated the sorceress might try something along those lines. He opened a dimensional portal to Page 50 of the topic and began casting the coconuts therein. Suddenly Malkia-chungu seized her opportunity and pushed Dr. Dimension through his own portal and sealed it, trapping the evil doctor until Page 50 of the plotline could be achieved.

"Well done, but now I have a surprise for you. For I see you are not here on page 50. The most beautiful woman will prevail over the world, and a man named Noble shall defeat you." Doctor Dimension's ethereal voice entered the sorceress' mind.

"Thou fool, the Narrators have made it so no character can kill me off!" The haughty Malkia-chungu boasted.

"You shall see." Dr. Dimension laughed and his voice faded away.

Misinterpreting the Doctor's foreshadowing and now paranoid the evil sorceress Malkia-chungu set out to find the fairest damsel in all the land to steal her beauty so that she could rule the world and to find the man named Noble to pre-empt the plotline prophesy.


MEANWHILE back in New York City Lynx was chasing his tail and Roh was still starring at the Empire State Building wondering why their plotlines have not been advanced.

 

[Lynx]

Roh should have joined Lynx in chasing his tail. Don't knock it till you've tried it.

Phoebe and Her Unicorn Comic Strip, January 16, 2016 on GoComics.com

 

[crosstweed]

Malkia-chungu decided the simplest and most straightforward way to find the fairest damsel in the land was to try Googling it. To her dismay, Googling "fairest damsel in all the land" only turned up image results of the most horrifyingly anemic and pale women, or pictures of young women with terrible sunburn, or vampires which was much worse. Malkia-chungu was forced to rethink her strategy.

MEANWHILE, IN AN ISOLATED PART OF THE HIMALAYAS...
Jack Black checked the pantry and to his chagrin discovered he was fresh out of Krispy Kreme mini doughnut holes.
"Alright," he grumbled to Tintin. "Grocery store run. Stay here and hold down the fort while I go gets me some more puffy glazed deliciousness."